Ok so my friend is aware that I am very attracted to him, but we made a deal that we could date other people, but we could not be intimate with them, only with each other. I agreed to this kind of reluctantly because I would not like to deceive someone I am with, but I still want to be with my friend. We live about 9 hours apart and this is the reason for the "dating other people" but I just worry that something will happen that will break us apart forever. Was this a good decision to date other people for a while until we can be together more often?
2006-12-22 13:22:18 · 12 answers · asked by crazydaisies86 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
We do talk everyday, but I still am not convinced that he wants to only be with me like I only want to be with him.
2006-12-22 13:24:01 · update #1
He is aware that I like him and he does like me...I do plan to move closer to him once I have my degree.
2006-12-22 13:26:30 · update #2
I am 20 years old and he is 26
2006-12-22 13:29:15 · update #3
Honestly, I'm not even sure if I should be intimate (even though I want to be) with him because I am afraid that I will get hurt. I don't like putting myself in extremely vulnerable positions like that because I unfortunately get too attached.
2006-12-22 13:59:49 · update #4
"true love is hard to find" Toots and the Maytals
"if its real, it will grow" Little Richard
we are human, its normal to want to scratch an itch sometimes
be safe
2006-12-22 13:25:57 · answer #1 · answered by kurticus1024 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ohhh. Thats a hard one. Okay, here is my deal. I have never really been able to date one guy if I am in love with another, so even if you do get into another relationship, you probably wont be happy because you'll only be thinking about the distance guy. Secondly, communication is huge. Let this guy know that you like him and that you arent interested in dating other people. Your cool with not dating him now, but maybe he could hold off for you or something. If he really is a good friend, he will understand you point of view. now, here is part two. Make sure that he isnt just messing with your head. My friend said he loved me and flirted with me and had a huge attraction, but ended up loving someone else and just using me for the side. It really really hurt me. You would want that to happen to you either. Other than that, trust your instinks. If it gets too stressful, get over him I suppose. I nice cup of hot chocolate and a good book always seems to make things better. Best of luck.
2006-12-22 13:28:41 · answer #2 · answered by missy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds kinda shady.
I had a long distance relationship but we lived 5 hours apart. There has to be effort. I drove to see her every weekend or every other weekend. He should do this as well, or you, if you want this relationship to actually work.
As for the whole "date others don't get intimate"..... he's kidding himself. He may think that is possible, as you may, but is totally not possible. One of you are going to date someone and kiss them then that leads to more, etc etc.
Is he serious? If he suggested that, I doubt it. But maybe he was just trying to be fair. Talk it over with him, find out if he truely likes you. Tell him in no certain terms that you are not going to date anyone else cause you can't see yourself even dating anyone else but him, even if not intimate. Ask him if he agrees to the same. If he does not, it is not worth the effort.
Sorry not trying to be mean, being realistic.
2006-12-22 13:29:18 · answer #3 · answered by abe_perkins81 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know from experience that long distance relationships are hard. Mine didn't work but I was dating a sailor. I think that if some how you can keep talking to him (I know how expensive long distance phone calls are) and stay friends that would be wonderful. My ex is based in San Diego, California and I live in North Carolina. Way long distance. I flew out there twice but then I was in a really bad car accident and I have metal in my jaw bones so I set off metal detector's. I wish you the best of luck with your situation and Merry Christmas!
2006-12-22 13:33:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Long distance relationships are very difficult. My husband and I were long distance friends for 2 years. We were strictly platonic until he moved to my state. Then it was on!!!! But, my advice is to date whomever you please. The deal about intimacy is unfair. If you all can not fully committ to one another, then don't do it at all. Whatever is meant to be, will be.
2006-12-22 13:28:35 · answer #5 · answered by So lyrical 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well first of all how old r u?? u shouldn't be having long distance relationships its not healthy, because u should be able to get to know other ppl and not be sticking to a person 9 hours away! live and learn and get to know other ppl!
2006-12-22 13:27:02 · answer #6 · answered by broughttogetherbydestiny 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's not fair to take relationship into your own hands and that distance in between should be used to deepe your love to each other not cheat on each other so next time u couples meet up make it warmer or a bedtime would be good (not being rude)
2006-12-22 13:26:22 · answer #7 · answered by net lover 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first ask the person to go out with you then if they say yes brake up with the other guy if they say no just say good I all ready have one then walk,and then tell your boyfriend you guys need to spend more time together.I'm a counselor I should know.
2006-12-22 13:35:05 · answer #8 · answered by cheetahs360 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Long Distance relationships never work out, im sorry to say this but forget about him,
If you a girl and reads this, could you answer my question:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20061222180738AAB014d&pa=FYd1D2bwHTHwIrxuF.M9RLdiuC2JiftP9TWR96OJZA4ylQ--&paid=asked&msgr_status=
2006-12-22 13:24:40 · answer #9 · answered by Diaz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stupid deal that you made with your friend, if you want to date him, date him
2006-12-22 13:24:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋