Is there any way to make someone understand??

Question

I have inlaws that I HATE!!
My husband seems to think it is his job to help them out financially when they are in trouble!
How to I make him realize that it is not his responsibility and make him stand up to his dad and tell him that he needs to get a job instead of always complaining about it to us?
I have only been married 6 months and I hate his dad so so much he is such an asshole! does any else relate to me ?

I knew this before I got married but it seems to be getting worse!
One day I am just gonna blow my top off and tell him what I think of him and his strange ways
is it so wrong to stand up for myself and my beliefs and the way I was brought up?

Answer 1

I can't relate to you, but I can tell you this. everyone has different family dynamics based on their upbringing. You need to have respect and patience for how your husband feels his family operates. These are his folks, so it is his decision. Don't wedge yourself in between it, no good will come of it.

Answer 2

i think your anger is going in the wrong direction. you are blaming your inlaws - but, just stop and think, are you mad at them, or your husband for listening to them? he has been brought up by your inlaws, probably to think that family is the most important thing, and that since they raised him, he is supposed to be there for their every need. if this is the case, you have to open up with your husband, tell him they brought him into this world to be independent when he was young, and now that is a grown man they want his help. that is not the way life goes - yes, they raised him, loved him and did the best they could - but, also love means that when you go out on your own and start your own family, that's where your responsibility really lies. i'm sure that is what his father wanted when he was young -and it's not fair of him to expect his son to take care of his financial needs - his father is not feeble, or that old, and has the intelligence to go out and look for a job, any job, to make ends meet. that his son has the same responsibilities now that he did and he should not be putting more pressure on his son to meet his needs. just because you have a child, it's not to make your life easier as you grow older but to be proud of the person you created and make him go out on his own to raise his own family. that is just the way life is supposed to be. if you father in law, was really disabled, i could see trying to help him, but as long as he a capable man, he should be taking care of himself and his family and let his son do the same with the family he has created. good luck.

Answer 3

tell your hubby that you will no longer tolerate free loaders...that you don't like to see lazy people take advantage of your good nature...you work hard for your stuff.. The negative energy you get from them is draining you ...they are like vampires draining the life out of you..that you guys need a life of your own...your newlyweds for gods sake....6 months!!!! OMG.......You want to stay married....I think you guys need to MOVE!!!! good luck.....don't matter what these other people say....your not married to the family...your married the son...does not mean you have to support everybody....

Answer 4

It' Christmas, why don't you try to bethankful for all the blessings in your life? One day you could be on the other end, in need of some help.

Answer 5

OBOY --SOUNDS LIKE A SIMILAR ISSUE THAT I HAVE --NEVER MARRIED BUT FATHERED 2 KIDS AND DEAL WITH GRANDPARENTS OFTEN --MITE NEED TO GET A DIVIORCE DUE TO THE STRESS IN THE RELATIONSHIP

Answer 6

no matter what you do your going to be the ***** taht separated the family. let him realize who he should put first, since you put him first.

Answer 7

ha ha. dumb azz. you should of known this before you got married, I'll bet one thousand dollars your marriage will fail.

Answer 8

No can't say I can......sorry babe