Is this the wrong way to go?

Question

I really think my gf has mental issues. Seriously. Stemming from some sort of childhood trauma (unfortunately, which is why I have been so patient so far) but she has me at wits end now. She holds me at arms length, won't let me go but won't let me near, either. Enter my conundrum. If I am right, this woman is a serious threat to herself if I do tell her I am leaving for good (based on what I have been reading and the assumptions I have been making, which have had to be made b/c I can't get her to tell me anything!) So, I am contemplating calling her best friend and asking her simply if she knows if my gf knows what is going on w/ her, and if not telling her about what I am thinking and also telling her to keep an eye on her for me b/c I can't do it anymore. Is there really any other option?

Answer 1

Yes! There is another option! You have got to tell her what you've noticed about her behavior. Ask her why. Ask what you can do to help. If she doesn't want to talk, and doesn't want to change, then really ask yourself if this is the girl you want to spend the rest of your life with...

But, do not call her best friend. Don't involve other people (friends, family, etc.) around you in your romantic relationship problems, if your not willing to discuss it with her first. It leads to disaster.