Chuck Norris Jokes 7
Pee Wee Herman got arrested for masturbating in public. The same day, Chuck Norris got an award for masturbating in public.
Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris. Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die.
If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the **** down
Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always.
A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
Chuck Norris never cries, because of this when he’s sad he roundhouse kicks himself and it makes him feel better since he knows he is the only one who can survive the roundhouse.
Chuck Norris does not procreate, he breeds
Chuck Norris’ sperm is so energetic that when he busts… Well, I’ll leave the rest up to your imagination.
When asked what type of vehicle he drives, Chuck Norris responded slyly with “Don’t you mean what kind of vehicle drives me?”
Chuck Norris’ evil twin brother, Richard Simmons, once approached Chuck with the hope of reconciliation, but at the sight of Richard’s curly, well kept hair, Chuck Norris became so enraged that he turned green with hate and ripped Richard Simmons arms and legs off. This action was the origin of the Marvel Comic badass, The Incredible Hulk.
Chuck Norris doesn’t worry about changing his clock twice a year for daylight savings time. The sun rises and sets when Chuck tells it to
2006-12-22 07:36:33 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
weren't these funny like 6 months ago?
2006-12-22 07:38:45 · answer #1 · answered by Sgt. Pepper 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If Chuck Norris were to jump into a lake, Chuck Norris would not get wet, the water would become... Chuck Norrised!
Chuck Norris eats a Rubix cube and craps it out solved!
Chuck Norris devours rocks and poops lightning bolts!
2006-12-22 07:43:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his father
Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer, however, he's never cried
Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg
2006-12-22 08:01:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
You're copying that from something in print arn't ya? Well punk arn't ya? Chuck Norris is ginger, Clint Eastwood would bang him out any day.
2006-12-22 07:40:41 · answer #4 · answered by mizzsquitz 3 · 0⤊ 4⤋
Wow....how long did it take you to come up with those?!?! lol. Funny, dude!!!
2006-12-22 07:42:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
whos chuck norris?? sounds like an evil guy....
2006-12-22 07:39:27 · answer #6 · answered by kim 4 · 2⤊ 5⤋
LOL. Some were so dumb it made me laugh.=]
2006-12-22 07:40:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i happen to deeply respect chuck norris and that offends me to see that kind of blaspheme
2006-12-22 07:46:38 · answer #8 · answered by LA Baby 2 · 1⤊ 6⤋
there old but still kool anywayz.
2006-12-22 07:44:36 · answer #9 · answered by funmzire 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you need to get out more! NOW!
2006-12-22 07:41:11 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ME♥ 6 · 0⤊ 3⤋