I'm horribly confused and I just need some advice. My boyfriend of a year and nearly a month comes at me with something I never expected. I thought that we were so happy. Basically, he told me that he wants to be with me but he feels like our relationship isn't special, it's just a routine. I don't feel that way and that's what makes it so hard. So we broke up. The next day he calls me back to tell me that he wants to date me again and it was just a mistake. Then he calls back again to tell me he's afraid our relationship won't work right now if we get back together. He wants to be single and he wants both of us to see what it's like to not have each other. He wants us to miss each other so we won't take things for granted the next time around. So now, we're still best friends. I'm scared that he'll fall out of love with me and find someone new while we're taking this break or w/e it is. He obviously confused, so what can I do to raise the chances of us getting back together again?
2006-12-22 04:27:15 · 9 answers · asked by Bella Rosa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You have to value yourself more than others will or wont. it seems that he is confused. You need to give him time alone to get things in his head straightened out. You have to understand that if he isnt sure that he wants to be with you, there is another that will be 100% sure. You need someone that is 100% sure that he wants you, if not it will lead to your heartbreak later on. I think you would be better off alone than with someone who is only half committed to you. In love there is something very important you must do. You have to seperate your mind from your heart. Your mind knows that being with someone who isnt sure he wants to be with you is a bad thing and that you might get hurt down the line. Therefore your mind knows the decision you have to make, give him time and space. If he really is yours he wont go anywhere. Your heart might not like the decision your mind makes but it is the best thing for you. You need to learn to seperate the two even if your heart might not agree most of the time. Good luck.
2006-12-22 04:36:20 · answer #1 · answered by Nyana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound young. I'm going to tell you straight. Move on and don't look back. First of all, if he loved you, he wouldn't have to be so unsure. You were together a year and one month (nearly), isn't that time enough to know whether your relationship is routine and/or special? I have always felt that when it's right it feels right. In a relationship of over 6 mos chances are that you are going to get into a routine. He is jerking you around and you are letting him. Move on, sister girl and fast. In time you will meet someone and it will be good. Word of advice: Men will treat you based on how you ALLOW them to treat you. Take care of you and it will be alright. :o)
2006-12-22 12:47:36 · answer #2 · answered by Delight 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he keeps u in this suspense, while he tries to decide, he wants to take a break cause he is interested in someone else, and wants to try it out. he didn't consider the relationship that special, cause he has someone else more special, but isn't sure about it so he keeps u there just in case it doesn't work out for them. he is giving u AL kinds of reasons that just aren't specific. he already has found someone else, and hasn't got the courage to tell u the truth. he wants to be without u because he has someone else, but wants the option of returning at any time he chooses if it doesn't work out. not exactly fair to u to treat u this way.get rid of him before he breaks your heart over and over again, as he is not trustworthy and he is a cheater.
2006-12-22 12:38:12 · answer #3 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that all you can do is tell him how you feel and see if he comes back to you. Give him time to think things through and make sure that he really wants to be with you. You can not force someone to love you so just hope and wish for the best and give him time.
2006-12-22 12:33:21 · answer #4 · answered by Mystic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As you state, you are confused. And, that is because your boyfriend is confused. Take time in this relationship rather than rushing into things. There are a lot of other guys out there if this does not work out.
2006-12-22 12:31:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hate to tell you this but he's not in love with you by any definition in my dictionary. Are you really certain you want a whiffle ball for a boy friend? My first thought is that you aren't confused. You know EXACTLY what's going on and don't like it one bit and I couldn't blame you at all. Whiffle balls don't grow up to be stable and solid things.
2006-12-22 12:36:06 · answer #6 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think the best thing that you can do now is act normal around him and still be there for him....just dont act like u realy need him and want to get bac k with him, trust me, i went through the same stuff..i know how u feel..
the most important thing is BE YOURSELF!!
good luck!
and merry christmas
2006-12-22 12:31:31 · answer #7 · answered by billy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't push him, it will drive him farther away. give him some time and if he wants you he'll come back. in the meantime go out with someone else....he may not like that and come crawling back real quick
2006-12-22 12:37:11 · answer #8 · answered by Buster 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as the old saying says if u love something set it free if it comes back it was meant to be. good luck
2006-12-22 12:30:58 · answer #9 · answered by Miss Crickett 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋