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I'm 13. My mom thinks I'm to young to date. Before you either A) say HELL NO or B) close the screen, consider this:
dating at this age is not DATING. A boyfriend is someone you go to the school dance with, a guy who you have feelings for who makes you feel good around. There's a guy who I like who likes me back who I was with. My mom found out and completely flipped out. She says she loves me and is trying to protect me, but I feel like 13 is the right age to have the beginning of a relationship as to gain experience for when I'm older. So, honestly: is it all right to 'date' at 13?

2006-12-22 02:37:40 · 12 answers · asked by cowgirl91 3 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

*sigh* I am NOT going to lose my virginity. I'm not a whore, thanks. I am talking about going to the movies with friends and a group of guys, hanging out a boyfriend, etc.

2006-12-22 02:44:16 · update #1

In case some people aren't getting this, the terms date and boyfriend are used as lightly as possible in lack of another word.

2006-12-22 02:46:56 · update #2

12 answers

cowgirl91 -
You did not tell us how old the boy is, so we're to assume he is the same age as you.

At 13, I'm guessing that you are in 7th or 8th grade.
I fondly recall that magical age when I wanted to go out with girls.
There were the school-sponsored dances, the birthday and holiday parties and group movie outings.
All those were chaperoned with adults nearby.

The best times were those holiday parties where my girlfriend and I could sneak away for a few quick kisses.

I think that all that is fine.
And from what little information you provided, it sounds okay to me.
Of course, if I was your dad, I'd probably feel very protective, too.
Cut your mom some slack.
She does have your best interest in mind.
You need to work to earn her trust by letting her know that you aren't planning to have sex or participate in harmful activities with this guy.

You might make it a point that if and when you go out with him, you do it with a group of friends.
Why?
Because no matter how nice this boy might be, you really don't know what hurtful or harmful things could happen to you.
NO ONE knows.
Always, always be careful and don't get yourself into a situation where you get hurt.
Listen to your mom, ask her if she's had bad experiences when she was younger.
Learn from her experiences.

I know that you believe you are mature enough to handle situations, but when girls twice your age find themselves getting attacked by their boyfriends, then you have to reconsider how vulnerable you really are.

2006-12-22 02:54:47 · answer #1 · answered by docscholl 6 · 0 0

When I was 13, it was group dates only. School dances and groups of kids going out was okay. Not just you and the guy you like. I am speaking from a mom's point of view now and I know she is just trying to protect you. You may think this dating is a period of just getting to know each other, but your mom may be afraid that it goes further than that. That's why she says no.

2006-12-22 02:41:28 · answer #2 · answered by momofmodi 4 · 1 0

I am a mom and I think at 13 it would be ok to go to a school dance with a boy. Ofcourse I would be that annoying mom who chaprones the dance to make sure my little girl is ok. Us Moms and Dads can't always help how controling we seem to be. We want to protect our childern. If your comfortable with your mom being at the next school dance perhaps she will let you go with this boy.

Childern don't always understand why parents do what they do. For instance, when I was 18 (legal age, yet living at home) I went out with some friends. I was running late coming home and my Dad had called the police on me. I wasn't doing anything wrong except being late. It was quite embarrassing when they pulled me over and told me I should get home, because my Daddy was looking for me.

He also would make me give him the full name of the person I was going to be with, their parents name, number, address and the licencse plate number. I never understood why he was so over protective all I could see was it was embarrassing. I understand now he was trying to let me have fun but trying to protect me as much as he could.

I told you this because I know that you probably don't want to let your mom be at the dance. Once Mom see's what is going on at the dance and you show her everything is ok little by little she will get used to the idea of letting you have some freedom.

As far as gaining experience for when your older, what do you mean by that? I hope you mean hanging out and nothing more. If you said this to your mom it probably made no sense to her. There is no experience to gain at 13 as far as dating. (This is a Mom's Perspective), (The way she see's it.)

Good luck and ask your Mom if she could champrone the dance so you can go with this boy.

2006-12-22 02:59:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Honestly speaking, i think it should be O.K for you to date as soon as you feel that you're ready. My brother had a girlfriend in kindergarten, so i don't see why you can't date at 13, i had a g.f when i was 12, so it all depends on a bunch of different specifications. But in the long run I'd say yeah, you should be able to date at 13.

2006-12-22 02:45:55 · answer #4 · answered by Corinthius99 1 · 0 0

why would you want to lock yourself into something? i think that's what your mom is against. so you decide to have a "boyfriend" but you would like to go to the dance with someone else, another boy that you're interested in being friends with. Now you have to deal with angst, broken hearts, anger, betrayal, and all that junk. having a boyfriend also implies going alone on dates, etc. it is someone you are interested in for a mate, not just a friend. It's okay for two people to have an understanding at your age, that you like each other, and if you're going to the dance likely to ask each other first, etc, but to commit yourself so firmly isn't really a great idea.

2006-12-22 02:44:40 · answer #5 · answered by smm 6 · 0 0

okay i started having boifriends when i was in like the first grade, but they didnt mean anything. kinda like what you are talking about. the thing is that when you start getting involved with guys, you have to understand a few things about them. they can be very sneeky.i guess she is just trying to make sure that you do not make any mistakes that you will not be able to handle right now. i know you are prolly thinking omg i wont make any of those mistakes!! but you have to think about the fact that most of the teenage girls that get pregnant didnt plan on it.i know that is kind of an "extreme" example!lol
so i guess you have a couple of options:
1.lie to your mom and date anyway
2.change your perspective and obey your moms wishes
3.talk to her and see if maybe you can work things out.

2006-12-22 02:54:31 · answer #6 · answered by summer girl 3 · 0 0

It's ok for you to date at 13. You're a teenager. Besides, you could always use the whole "responsibility" thing as an excuse. Have fun!!!

2006-12-22 02:40:56 · answer #7 · answered by Greg S 1 · 0 0

my mom isn't going to let me date until i'm like 14 but honestly i think 13 is a great age

2006-12-22 02:40:20 · answer #8 · answered by , 4 · 0 0

it quite is is unquestionably healthful for a woman to try this through fact ladies what mature adult adult males for some reason i went for a youthful guy through fact he made me giggle yet than i observed he replaced into as mature as a 3year previous boy so i dumped him. If this guy makes you satisfied its completely fantastic.

2016-10-15 10:44:48 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

Yeah,why not?If u feel ure mature enough,go for it.Remember that u are still a child and don't forget to have fun.

2006-12-22 02:42:05 · answer #10 · answered by n 5 · 0 0

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