Do other people's comments about you bother you a lot?

Question

My cousin is really one poor soul. She has scoliosis,and currently she's wearing a brace. However lots of people laugh or keep staring at her because of her brace. She's really growing to hate the brace that has brought her kinda..lots of shame. Does she really need to care so much about what people say about her?

Answer 1

There's nothing shameful or degrading about a brace. It has brought her freedoms that would have been impossible 100 years ago. She should not hate the brace which is helping her.

She did not choose scoliosis, she did nothing wrong. If people laugh or comment they are pieces of sh*t. She could hate them, but really, why bother?

Your cousin may wear the brace but those morons are the cripples. Once she realizes that regardless of the brace she towers over them in things that really matter, their comments will be utterly meaningless. You have to help her get to that point.

Answer 2

The reality is that she is human and all humans have feelings. It is normal for her to get hurt when people make fun of her, anyone would be. I get upset when I go out and people make fun of the way I dress and there are days when I just want to dissapear. However, the important thing is that if she is a good person, then people shouldn't think of her as "the girl with the brace." If they still give her funny looks then she shouldn't be embarrassed but she should feel sorry for those people. They have such low self-esteem that they need to put others down to make themselves feel superior. There is nothing wrong with wearing a brace, we all have our flaws and that's what makes us unique. Let your cousin know that if those people are rude then she wouldn't ever want to be friends with such superficial people. If they can't see her for who she really is, then they're not worth it. I hope this helps you and I hope your cousin stays well.

Happy Holidays to you and your family.

Answer 3

she doesn't but it gets old and hurts even if you "don't care" what people say. IE....I am 29 and my daughter is 1.5....I look very young and could pass for about 17-18. I constantly get comments from strangers about how I'm such a "young mom" and then people shake their heads or say something mean. Happens at least once a day or once every other day. Yes, I do try to pass it off as just people are being rude or mean spirited but it does hurt after awhile. I had a cashier at a store talk about me to her customers the other day and then the 3 of them proceeded to give me dirty looks continuously and just stare very blatently. I had gotten about 5 comments that day from various rude individuals so that kind of did it and so I reported the cashier to the manager and she got written up.

Re: your cousin, I hope that her scoliosis improves but in terms of people saying things or whatsoever...she's either going to have to develop a tough skin and ignore it or learn to say something back to them.

I hope you and yours have a great holiday....

Answer 4

Only under the worst of confluent circumstances am i ever caught off guard by criticism from others or slander for that part .
Please tell your cousin not to stand in their shadows of the blind and ignorant ... I once knew a beautiful girl in a similar brace but her brother was overly protective and would not even allow me to converse with her so the heart can I know from experience see beyond a brace to the attractive beauty of the whole person. I had to remain a distant admirer.
Peace out and enjoy the holidays

Answer 5

I have scoliosis too. I dont wear a brace though as my curvature isnt increasing.. im thankful for that simply because the brace is quite uncomfi more than embarrassing.. newy.. i think its normal for ppl to look at ur cousin because think logically, they dont know why shes wearing the brace! in fact most of them may b thinking tht she had an accident of some sort... and as for those who laugh at her, i think u shud rlly not bother bout tht... no one who is mature enuf would seriously laugh at that...so perhaps instead u shud find new places to chill at.
being effected by peoples comments is something one has to sort out for themselves... and a more logical approach to such things is always better! i.e. those who know ur cousin wouldnt judge her because of her brace! and those who mock her or pity her, perhaps dont know her at all! so she rlly has nothing to lose..! n dont call her a "poor soul"...

Answer 6

People can be cruel. She needs to ignore the rude people that
do such stupid things. I know from experience how those odd
stares can affect your own feelings about yourself. I've used a
cane to help me walk for over ten years now and am 46 now.
I've had people that came up to me and ask why I use a cane at
my age. I was told that I was to young to be using a cane, so why
was I using it. I would try and explain my situation at first and feel
like I was at fault somehow. I have learned to answer in a quick
and simple way. I just tell them that I have to have it to walk. The
people that just stare, I simply smile and go on my way. If they
laugh or snicker about my situation, I have the satisfaction of knowing that they are handicapped too. We just can't see their
type of handicap with our eyes but we know that it is there all the
same. Tell your cousin to love herself and overlook those that are
missing in the brain department. She could laugh right back as if she could see just how damaged they really are.

Answer 7

No, she should not care so much.
Children tend to tease those who are different. I think it's because everybody feelds self-conscious, and they want to draw attention away from themselves by focusing it onto someone else.
There are actually many people who have scoliosis (I can name at least two among my acquaintances) so it's not that uncommon. When your cousin gets a little older and her associates get a little older, people won't make a big deal about it.
It can be hurtful now, but as your cousin you can support her and assure her that you care about her no matter what her physical condition. This question proves that.

Answer 8

everybody cares to some degree, and im guessing shes younger so being in school doesnt help the situtation much either. i would stress to her that being made fun of for the brace now is better than being made fun of for looking like shes always leaning over to see something later (hopefully that will make her laugh). as long as she has good friends to stand up for her when she cant for herself she should be fine.

Answer 9

I think everyone cares about what others think about them, otherwise you wouldn't be able to keep your job, or keep out of serious trouble. Poeple follow rules, and rules are made by people, and to avoid someone judging you negatively and saying your breaking the rules, you conform becuase your worried about what others with power may think. And power comes in many forms. Everyone conforms on some level.

Put yourself in her shoes, if people called you names all the time because they think you look funny, at some point it will bother you. In fact, everyone has been in that situation at some point in there lives. All one can do is take time to try and overcome it.

Answer 10

Oh f them! Tell her to keep her head up! Everyone gets talked about and laughed at. It sucks that she has had health problems, and its unfortunate that some people are jerks. This will make her a stronger person in the long run.