My husband and I are staying with his mother to save some money. It is ok I guess we don't get along and I am pregnant due any day. Well anyways how the hell do I keep her from just walking in our room? We have no privacy. Its ridiculous I am really starting to get pissed off. She is the type of person that freaks out over everything. So if I go mention to her I would appreciate if you stop walking in our room and start knocking she would probably start yell and freakin out. We will have enough money to move out by the end of January. We have plenty of money we just want to put a big down payment on a house so we decided to stay here for a little while. How do I go about in fixing my problem. Need advise thanks....
2006-12-21 18:10:31 · 17 answers · asked by I_Can_Help 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
He works all the time and he knows his mom freaks out over nothing so he doesn't want to talk to her. He avoids her as much as he can. I am the one that has to sit with her every day while he works 13 hours a day.
2006-12-21 18:15:28 · update #1
There is no Lock. We tried to buy on but the doors are funny and they don't fit. And she said she doesn't want up messing with her stuff. To make it fit.
2006-12-21 18:17:13 · update #2
Lock the bedroom door...
2006-12-21 18:15:58 · answer #1 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I couldn't help you if this was a common area in the house because of the fact that it is her house, however you are entitled to privacy. If you can't get it in your bedroom then you're not getting it period. Out of respect to your spouse, I would talk to him about it and be more aggressive about the issue.It takes a man to look after the best interests of his family. The fcat that this is his mother should make it that much easier to confront. There are a number of things that people do in private (change of clothes, sleep with minimal clothes,sex,etc. You don't have to justify your desires for privacy. It's a common courtesy. Tell him or her that you appreciate her generosity, but you need your privacy because it makes you feel uncfotable. tell her that you were so reluctant to confront the issue with her because you didn't want to offend and disrupt the living atmosphere, but not doing so would contribute to just that. Be assertive if you decided to talk with her, but let him know in advance or give him a shot first. It would be a great idea for both of you to be present so you both can witness what was said and what wasn't.
2006-12-22 03:37:46 · answer #2 · answered by vince 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It would be easier to move now before you have your baby. Find a small place for a few months while looking for a place to buy. You both would benefit by being responsible for yourself.
If you look at it realistically, you will want to be in your own place with privacy.
Otherwise buy a old fashioned simple hook latch. It comes in two parts. One is an eyelet and the other hooks into the eyelet. Just screw eyelet into the door jam and the hook piece into the door.
They probably cost no more than a dollar or so. Buy a bunch and hide some in case she removes it you can just keep putting one on.
2006-12-22 03:29:20 · answer #3 · answered by DeeJay 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with ?asked. Talk to her women to women. Tell her that u need ur space since u r carrying her hrand child & if she keeps this up just tell her the stress u r under is NOT good for her grandchild. Ask her if she want's something to happen. Also talk to ur husband & tell him that he has to talk to his mother because this is not helping u w/ ur pregnancy. U the pregnancy card w/ them both! Tell him that he is a man & going to be a father so why can't he like one. Ur hermones r only going to last so long so have at it but do it nicely don't make ur self go in to labor!! If ur hasband asks just blame talking to his mother on hermones! Maybe he is waiting for u to make the first move. Hope this helps!! Besides EVERYONE KNOW THAT PREGNANT WOMEN ARE MOODY USE IT TO UR ADVANTAGE!!
My sister had bascally the same problem w/ her mother in law till she had enough & laid in to her. Her mother in law actually took the door off the hinges so THEY had NO privacy!! After my sister talked to her (her husband didn't want to speak to his mom either) mother in law she appolygied & put the door on the hinges again. Now they get along great!! Golld luck!!
2006-12-22 02:37:30 · answer #4 · answered by Missy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can ask her (note the word 'ask' and not TELL her)to be a little more considerate and to respect you and your husband's privacy while you are staying in her house. Let her know that you are already uncomfortable being there because you are not in your OWN home, and that as difficult as that is in itself, her walking into your room with no notice is annoying and disrespect. Make sure you don't say this when you are already upset, or irritated.....God Bless, and Congratulations on your 'soon to be' new born baby!!
2006-12-22 02:19:28 · answer #5 · answered by Monique 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Can you be patient for a little while longer?Could you ask your mother-in-law for privacy?You have a right to privacy. TELL HERPolitelythat you are having a nap because you are pregnant and need lots of rest before the baby is due.Failing that you and your husband will need to sit down with his mother and set down guidelines.
2006-12-22 03:00:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm paraphrasing here, but there's a saying about "two women living in the same house"...in a nutshell, it's not easy. Especially if they're two grown women.
You must remember that you are in HER house. Even though that is the case, she should still knock. That's common courtesy. If anyone should say something to her, it should be your husband. You should be taking it easy...remember you're due any day now. Just think...you'll be in your own house soon. Keep your eyes on the prize! lol
P.S. Congrats on the baby!!
2006-12-22 02:17:09 · answer #7 · answered by Prodigalchild 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
When you want privacy put a chair or something harder to move in front of the door so she hits it when she tries to open it. At least that way you will have a little warning.
Best advice, move as soon as possible.
2006-12-22 02:37:33 · answer #8 · answered by T 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know the obvious answer, and you have the ability to change the situation.
As long as you're staying there, you can continue to expect the same thing to continue on.
So, with that in mind, you don't have the right to complain. You're an imposition on her, and if you're married, pregnant and have plenty of money, then you're freeloaders. Grow up and act like adults by living on your own, regardless of how much you want to put down on a house.
2006-12-22 02:17:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
I would kindly ask her to knock first because you like your privacy at times.
Tell her you understand it's her home but it's your room right now and you don't want her walking in while you are dressing, you are uncomfortable with this.
Good luck!
2006-12-22 03:08:29 · answer #10 · answered by LC 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Her house, her rules. I don't agree with her walking into your room without knocking, however. I'd suck it up and tough it out for another month. We can endure almost anything for a month. If you speak up - the tension will get worse and it may be an even longer month. Congrat's on baby...
2006-12-22 02:14:26 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋