My guy is 51, enjoys watchin net porn, does not have physical probs, says he is attracted to me....but no sex?

Question

What is wrong with this picture? I am dumbfounded.

Everything is in proper working order down below. He enjoys watching naughtiness. He says he finds me attractive. Yet, we seldom make love. He is 51.

We have lived together 5 months, dated online for over a year. I suspect he is using me for a roof.....he wasn't very happy where he was before. What do you think?

Answer 1

Tell him to screw you or get out.

Answer 2

Your guy is 51, watches porn, doesn't have physical problems but you seldom make love. Well, you obviously met online and dated online, which confuses me how do you date someone online? That should have been your first clue, he must be pretty cheap if he dated you online. Right? Anotherwords he didn't take you out in the real world to a real restaurant or real movie right? It was all done on line. So you both probably cybered one another too. Cheap sex. So it shouldn't be any wonder to you that he lives his life online and not in reality. Porn, something he can't have online. But he must be getting satisfied somewhere? After all he met you online, how do you know he hasn't met someone else online? Something to consider. His age shouldn't have anything to do with his libido. He sounds like he is just addicted to porn. And the time he wastes watching that you both could be making love. If you don't like what he is doing, then either talk to him about it, if things don't change, he can leave. It's your roof!

Answer 3

well you have two options. 1. BREAK UP WITH HIM!! he's obviously not taking your feelings into consideration. if you think he's using you for a roof, he very well might be. always be cautious with internet relationships. and 2. try doing some of the positions with him. maybe if you re-enact some sex scenes, you'll excite him and he'll drop his porn habit. maybe he forgot that he had a beautiful woman next to him, and he DOESN'T NEED porn anymore. if you want to work on it, remind him he's got the real thing, instead of a dirty Kleenex.

i think you should break up with him. if he's into the porn thing, he still has a healthy sex drive. there's no reason why you guys aren't going at it like maniacs. but at 51, he should has his **** together, especially by now. he's still livin a boy-ish lifestyle, and you what you really need is a man.

good luck!

Answer 4

Since you are wanting more sex than he's offering, it's interesting that you haven't asked him for it, and, if he says/acts 'no', asked him ~ in a clear moment when he's loving and you can listen caringly ~ what's up. There could be any number of reasons, and they may or may not have anything to do with you or the relationship. For example, perhaps he doesn't enjoy sex? Perhaps he's afraid of sex with you because his mind associates sex acts with some disastrous experience with another person? (In which case self-stimulation with porn can feel "safe".)

If the problem seems to be outwith his awareness, you could consider a counsellor -- couple counselling*, him alone, or yourself alone are all available. If you feel true love together, it would be a sadness if difficulties with sex alone lead to a break- up.


* also called psychotherapy, especially in the States.

Answer 5

He must be fine as a person in other regards as you haven't complained about them. Instead of being diplomatic and trying to answer this question by adding up the small signals you detect, why not ask him straight? A lot of people are able to tackle the diplomatic approach and wriggle away, but not many can avoid it when you give it to them straight.

Hey [name],
Do you actually find me attractive and enjoy spending time with me? Or am I merely providing you with a good roof over your head?

Answer 6

Whether he's a perv or not, sex is a huge part of a relationship. Part of finding that special someone is finding someone with a similar libido. Or at least someone willing to sympathize with your needs and be willing to compromise. I think you should be asking yourself if this is something you can do; a relationship you can do. What if it turns out that he's not a perv and just aging a bit and with it went his libido? Then you are faced with no sex, and nothing to blame it on. Are you going to be able to be happy in this relationship without your needs being met? Or at least met half way? If not, I say let it go while you aren't too attached and find someone who's willing to love you AND your body.

Answer 7

I'm 41 and kind of did the same thing.

I only make love and get intimate with a woman when its serious and most things are doing fine, call me stupid, but I don't like making love unless I feel great about the relationship (most men can make love to a dirty rag)

sorry to say, kick him to the curb or make him come clean.

Answer 8

is it the shown fact that they are youthful it quite is bothering you or the shown fact that its porn era. he's a guy. any form of porn is going to be good adequate for him. y dont u attempt observing it with him. somewhat him watch it than certainly performing on this is lots extra suitable. plus ur no longer broken products. being a mom is the terrific blessing a woman can ask for.

Answer 9

I just can't believe you have asked this question, when the answer is right in your face!!
He watches porn! 'Says" he finds you attractive!!
But rarely any sex between you !!! DDAAAAAAA',
Hell yes, he's using you.
Get the perverted 'BUM' out of there, and find someone who
'really' finds you attractive.
He's so hung up on (what he can't have) in those porn shows,
his morbid world revolves around it
You are worth more than that 'BUM'...

Answer 10

I think he's using you. He watches porn all the time yet won't touch you sexually? That's an insult. I wouldn't waste too much time on this guy. There's better out there - trust me.

Answer 11

The internet is an addiction.
Its not you, but if he doesn't pay you attention, then like a bad date, drop his sorry ***. Give him a choice, you or porn. Which will be there when he loses his hands?