I feel like I've failed and I'm angry at myself. All anyone ever does is "get through it" but as soon as you do, something else pops up. Will it get better? How can I learn to accept the things I can't change and move on?
2006-12-21 16:29:38 · 3 answers · asked by Sarah 4 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Try these books: First read "Learned Optimism" -- I think that will help you a lot. Then you can read "What You Can Change and What You Can't" if you have a specific problem that he addresses. They're both by Martin Seligman, MD
You can also try a seminar by a place called Landmark Education. It's three days for the basic seminar, and five days for the advanced, and it costs money, but I think you'll find that it's well worth it.
2006-12-22 06:37:38 · answer #1 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say that you feel you've failed, so a big first step is to NOT see yourself as a failure. Beating up on yourself can only make things seem worse and it can set you up for self-defeating behaviors. Life is full of ups and downs and although the down times can be really tough, they can also be good opportunites for learning and growing.
It may take a lot of practice to start seeing life in a more positive light, but it is possible. As soon as you start to say things that are self-defeating such as "I'm a failure" or something like that, replace it with a more positive thought such as "everyone makes mistakes" or "I'm just having a bad day today". Believe me, just taking this simple step can have a big impact on how you see yourself and those around you.
There is some truth to "getting through" a difficult time, but the key is how you get through it. Getting through these times in positive ways is what's important. Such things as replacing judgemental thoughts, being with friends who are supportive, taking good care of yourself, doing things that you enjoy and reaching out to help others can go a long way in improving your outlook. Also, if things just get to be way too hard for you there's no shame in seeking professional help from a therapist.
Good luck and be good to yourself...things will get better
2006-12-25 14:19:47 · answer #2 · answered by mountaingirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every time one door closes another opens, you are merely on a journey. Learn from the difficulties that you may prosper in the end.
2006-12-23 00:43:57 · answer #3 · answered by tamara.knsley@sbcglobal.net 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋