My daughter is in the "no" stage and the "I do it." stage. Sometimes we need to get out the door and she simply can't figure out how to get those pants on. She holds on to them and won't let me help her. I feel bad physically overpowering her, like a bully. How have you convinced your toddler to let you help them get dressed?
2006-12-21 14:52:44 · 15 answers · asked by katherinernilson 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
If i'm not in a hurry I let my daughter dress herself. I like to let her imagination and style run free. But if I'm in a hurry, I explain to her that we gotta go and now is not the time. Sometimes she'll cry because she doesnt get to wear what she wants, but its not like she's going to hold it against you forever. She has to understand that she is entitled to her opinion, but you have the overall say. Sometimes, if she wont let me dress her, I start walking to the door. She then lets me do it.
2006-12-21 15:01:12 · answer #1 · answered by Laurellamags 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Distract her by letting her "help" you do it. If she's got a competitive spirit, make it a race. See if she can sing her favorite song before you get the pants on.
Try pretending there is a train outside your house waiting for you to take you wherever you are going. Tell her you'll need to help her put on her pants so you don't miss the train. Then the whole way there, you can pretend you're going for a train ride. She can even drive!
Tell an impromptu story about how a little girl once had a pair of magic pants. Show her how the magic pants danced and flew and even started talking! (She'll have to hand over the pants for this!) Then tell her how the magic pants found a little girl who was just so much fun that she wanted to be worn by her right away. Make the pants walk over and talk to her as she puts them on. "Hello little girl. Will you wear me? Can you put your leg in here?"
Just a few ideas--hope these helped! And don't worry--in a year or 2 when they are still asking for your help in getting dressed, you'll miss the "do-it-myself" phase!
2006-12-21 19:33:31 · answer #2 · answered by MountainChick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh goodness, it's hard isn't it? It's actually a good thing she's trying. It's normal!
Give yourself PLENTY of time to get them ready. I've started letting my son go into the closet and pick out his clothes, or I ask him would you rather wear choice A or B?
Also, I let him have a go at trying to put them on and I walk away. I just say, come and get Mommy if you need some help hon. 2 mins later, he asks me for help and I show him to do it.
At the occasions that doesn't work, I bribe. I say we're running late, Mommy has to help you and once we get into the car I'll give you (insert your reward.) I know food as a reward isn't the best, but it works well for us. We have those 100 calorie packs of cookies, and I'll dump a few in a bag for him and he RUNS out of the door for the car.
Good luck!
2006-12-21 23:13:52 · answer #3 · answered by avalonlee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe try setting a timer? When the timer goes off, if she's not dressed then it's time for help?
Or, if you know you're in a hurry, when you hand her the clothes say, "Let's do it together! You do your shirt and I'll do your pants."
Make a game of it. Ask her is she can jump/hop/slither into her clothes with you.
Count as you do it and see how quickly the two of you can do it. Can you beat the number you got to last time?
2006-12-21 15:04:20 · answer #4 · answered by momma2mingbu 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Basically I started getting ready a lot sooner than needed for just those occasions, which gave my daughter time to dress herself...there were no major hassles that way and we both got out the door and to whatever we had to do on time.
2006-12-21 16:28:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard because you don't want to send them mixed signals. I know how you feel. Sometimes you want to let them do it themselves. But other times you need to rush and you can't let them do it themselves.
I would always try to allow extra time when getting dressed. Try to make a chart where your daughter does not get frustrated if you need to help her. Then she gets a sticker on her chart. Once she gets 10 stickers, she can pick a prize or something special that's small. It's good to teach her patience and also to listen to you, while also allowing her to be independent.
2006-12-21 14:59:40 · answer #6 · answered by ReeberKaseyMarcus 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes your child just has to accept that you are the mommy and she has to do what you say like it or not. This kind of will power struggle is just beginning and won't get any easier as she gets older. Take it form one who knows, the terrible twos are nothing compared to the teen years. So do your best to get control now or you will have none at all in the teen years.
2006-12-21 15:02:35 · answer #7 · answered by Country girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Toddlers are dawdlers... I just had to get her started early so she was ready to go when I was. My 4 year old is now in the "I pick it out Mom" phase, so we're back to being late sometimes. The more she does it, the better she gets at it and the quicker she will be. Just get her started earlier and avoid the fight.
2006-12-21 15:05:08 · answer #8 · answered by ihave5katz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Today, we are late, and Mommy must put your pants on. When we get home, Mommy will let you practice putting your own pants on."
Stick to it. Let her try on every pair she owns and put on a fashion show. And if there is time before leaving, let her try to dress her self. With my son, my routine started with giving him his clothes. Then I'd let him work on it while I dressed, got the diaper bag together, and got everything ready to go. By the time I was ready, he was either done or ready to accept help.
2006-12-21 16:13:11 · answer #9 · answered by imjustasteph 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make it a game... "how fast can mommy get your pants on... hurry hurry help mommy get you dressed... put your leg in here... hurry hurry..."... when its a game it isn't you overpowering her... its fun lets do it again... she doesn't go into the no thing and you can get her dressed quick with little or no fuss
2006-12-21 15:03:22 · answer #10 · answered by auntbea 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋