Home schoolers more mature?

Question

I see a lot of people on here say that home schoolers are more mature then public/private school kids. Public/private schooled children are so immature. Home schoolers are so much better.

And a while ago someone posted something about how kids are "growing up to fast" and becoming "little adults".

If a home schooled child is 12 years of age and he/she acts more mature then average 12 year olds, then wouldn't that home schooled child be considered a "little adult"?

Is home schooling promoting children to grow up to fast? Become little adults?

In my opinion I think some home schooling parents are trying to teach their children grow up to fast and act like mature little adults. Instead of letting the kid be a kid.

And I'm gonna say this again so people wont get mad, SOME HOME SCHOOLING PARENTS, NOT ALL.

Answer 1

I appreciate the last sentence that you wrote "some homeschooling parents, not all". I completely understand that you are tactfully making a generalization. But, allow me to slightly rephrase the sentence, so that it is true.

In respect to Homeschoolers growing up too fast and becoming 'little adults'....it is "FEW homeschooling parents, not most." That is a correct statement.

Go ask a college professor what they think of the homeschool students that they've had...they'll give you better answers. You will probably find that they say "Oh, my homeschool students make sure they come to every class! They never skip. They contribute to the class. They hand in work on time. And seem to be focused and aren't afraid to ask for help if they need it."
Every college professor that I've had has always said their homeschool students were a joy to teach, and there was never a problem with 'fitting' in.

If elementary and middle school 'homeschoolers' are growing up too fast by having manners, focusing on school, doing their chores, and relating to people their age and beyond....what is wrong with that?


And let me say that calling homeschoolers 'social retards' (a reference to someone else who answered this questions) is very crass. Someone should know that the word 'retard' is very degrading and not 'politically correct' (which is what every public school tries to be). So whoever it was certainly didn't learn in their public school that we don't use the word 'retard' as there are people who really do have mental handicaps...

And yes, I know homeschooled kids who were nuts about the Backstreet Boys, believed in Santa, and wanted to have the latest shoe fashion. The difference was that their focus wasn't deftly set on those things...they knew what their priorities were....that is never a bad thing at any age.

And as with any group of people...there will always be those who don't fit into any mold....those usually go on to invent amazing things that society needs. Thank goodness for them. If they were out socializing in bars and singles groups all the time, we might not have the telephone or our precious computers!
Homeschoolers are all different, but they do understand not to lump mass people groups together and make cut-and-dry statements. Such as "public schoolers are all, shallow, unfocused, drug using, sexually active students...but will be perfect in college"........homeschoolers understand that that isn't true! But for some reason, public educated people feel that they can make judgements about homeschooled students...and it's okay.

FOCUS is the key...and if you can have FOCUS and be in public school...more power to you and good luck! If you want your kids to be homeschooled and have FOCUS.....good luck..it's not an easy job at all...but usually worth it.

Homeschooling isn't a walk in the park. It is hard work on the parents. But alot of times it pays off.

But as humans...lets all try to stop making judgements about groups of people...you'd think proper 'socialization' would have taught the majority that by now.

Answer 2

Home schoolers are educated more strict and discipline than their public and private school counterparts.

You think your parents gonna give you some slack if they were given the opportunity to educate you? I was given a more strict and discipline education from my mother than my teacher at school, up to the point I cry. And the education or torture if you prefered don't stop at the ring of a bell.


And yes, home schoolers tend to be more mature. That's why in the past people grown up much faster, since they learn in their homes. A 14 years old should be a young adult, not a kid.

The problem arise if the teacher forced things, but that could happen in any kind of education.



As for kids doing 'grown up' stuff.

That's because they are still kids, they are doing those things because they want to grown up but are denied the right to do so.

The result? Not a girl, not a woman, just one confused female.

Answer 3

Well, think about it: The minority of home schoolers who are not socialized stick out like sore thumbs. They are the ones who cant look you in the eye without stuttering, and usually just look 'off' for some reason. The majority of home schoolers are walking among us as normal people. They are socialized, smart, well dressed, well read, and get along with the general public. The minority is what you see right away. The majority you dont see, unless to comment on something positive they did. Public schoolers assume that these exemplary examples of society are public schooled just like them, and never ask to find out different. The minority is all they see. Understandable, but extremely short sighted.

Answer 4

Ok here is what I think. I think when people say kids are growing up to fast they mean they are dressing like a teenage at 7 and dressing 21 at 15. They are dating earlier, having sex earlier, they are getting pregnant at 12. Today I took my kids to see Santa and I saw a little girl who was like 6 putting on lipstick for her picture.

These are things the kids aren't really ready for. Decisions they aren't ready to make because they don't have the maturity or experience to anticipate the consequences. Or the responsibility and skills to deal with the consequences.

This is one reason some parents homeschool. They want their kids to be kids as long as they can. I like that my 8 year old still believes in Santa and chooses what he watches on TV or does with his free time because it is what he likes and not what his friends tell him is cool. He likes to look nice when he goes places but doesn't worry about wearing a Tigger Tshirt to play. He can be 8. Not try to be 18.

When people say homeschool kids are more mature. I would say of course not all, but by mature, they mean responsible. Homeschool kids have parents who are home. They are interested. They work with their kids on learing chores to become self sufficient. They work on study skills and independent study. They have a better chance to grow up to be responsible and mature.

Unfortunatley a lot of public school kids start off in daycare at 6 in the morning, spend all day at school, go back to daycare until 6. They go home have dinner, do homework and go to bed. Their parents feel guilty and so over indulge, giving them more money and objects. By middle school they come home to an empty house, no supervison. So they raise themselves. No example to follow, no correction of poor behavior. So they handle situations they are not ready for under the instruction of their peers and are therefore less responsible and mature. Also by spending most of their time with people their own age and maturity they don't get as much of a chance to learn how to deal with people of different ages and experiences.

Of course this is not all public schoolers or all home schoolers. It is a generalization based on the best and the worse, but since that is what people on here seem to be focusing on it is the best explanation I can give.

Thanks for the question. Merry Christmas

Answer 5

I am homeschooled, we are more mature, I have been amazed at how shallow and immature some of my "Friends" that go to public schools are! They put so many empty things before education. At this age education needs to be the most important part of our lives. My friends because she distracts herself with many other things only gets C's I have never gotten a single B on a report card or mid term or anything. Now homeschooled I have steady overall grade consisting of A+'s and plain old A's, I have other things then school of course, I play soccer and ride horses and play acoustic guitar. Education is my main though. I know what college I am going to go to, I am going for a Scholarship, I want to be an Architect and teach riding lessons on the side. What kind of 13 year old girl even considers worrying about getting a boyfriend? That's just so astonishing that someone as young as I would even consider a boyfriend. Anyway, yes homeschooled kids are more mature and learn more. They can work longer since they are home, they can do extra work! That is my favorite, when I am bored I either call my friends play my guitar or do more school. : ) Oh and I am fully socialized, my mom gets compliments all the time. My manners on the phone, my soccer coach said that I have the best Character out off all the kids he has ever worked with. My mom started crying, people have complimented me on my people skills. I have had a job before, I took care of 22 horses, I fed, groomed, cleaned and all for these horses every morning at 7:30. My boss said that I had the best work ethic then anyone that has ever worked for her. I have been homeschooled since the middle of 3rd grade, one of the other answers was very insulting to me. I am not a "Social Retard". Why you would say that is beyond me. That's not nice to say. That was rude, I have great social skills and I don't need someone that doesn't know me to tell me that Homeschooled kids are "Social Retards". I know everything that goes on in public schools, it's wrong, inappropriate, distracting and sad. I was in school for 4 years. Young elementry and it was traumatic things that happened to me. My sister isn't completly right in the mind and she got picked on all the time, that's wrong. I would stick up for her but for doing the right thing I was treated wrong. Homeschooling is a much better route to go. Those of you who said it wasn't you need to do your research before you answer. I am a grade ahead of all my friends. I am supposed to be in 7th, I am in 8th. Hope this helped some of you to understand. My parents don't want a break from us and I don't want one from them, but when it comes the time for me to leave, I can do it. I already go on Youth Trips.

Answer 6

There's a difference between maturity and growing up too fast.

Being able to reason better about things, especially during the teen years, is a sign of maturity. Being able to make wise choices is a sign of maturity.

Wearing skimpy clothes at the age of 9 and dating at 11 is growing up too fast. Acting at 14 like what they think is adult behaviour--having sex, drinking, doing drugs--is growing up too fast. Heck, I've heard of two teen girls (16 and 18) recently who are pregnant and darn proud of it. They haven't even finished school. That is growing up too fast.

It seems you've taken people's comments about homeschoolers *tending* to be more mature personally, as evidenced by your perception of "home schoolers are so much better". The comment is an observation, not a general judgment against public schooled kids. I've taught in the schools and there are some wonderfully mature kids. However, there are certain behaviours that are more prevalent in schools than among homeschoolers--in my experience. My dh, also a teacher, has noticed the same.

ADDED:
I thought more about how I see homeschooled teens as often more mature than their public schooled counterparts. It really comes down to where their focus is. Public schooled teens tend to be more focused on their peers--being like them, dressing like them, impressing them, spending as much time as they can with them, being focused on things like music and such with them, etc. Homeschooled teens I've met have a different focus, for the most part: they are much more themselves than being who they think they need to be to fit in.

But not only that, simply because the culture around them is different, their interests just aren't in the same areas. People tend to become what is around them, and this goes for adults as well. If an adult finds himself working somewhere where people swear a lot or have negative attitudes, the adult has a great chance of starting to swear and adopting a negative attitude. There is plenty of literature and studies out there for adults and about adults that shows that we are not as impervious to these things as we think we might be. Kids are much more likely to adopt what's around them than we are.

Answer 7

See the issue with home schooling your children is they do not get the normal socialization that they should. The reason they mature fatser is because they are around adults all day long and never learn how to develop relationships with their peers. Public schools may not be the best environment but it is set up to give a child a well rounded education which includes socialization with peers, this will be imporatnt in the future since it is these relationships will build relationships outside of school. So as a parent you have to weight the decision teach my kids to be smart and miss out on adapting them socially or giving up some of that refinement for socialization and a more well rounded child?

Answer 8

Some parents do make their kids grow up too fast. However, maturity isn't something you can really push on someone. It has to happen.

Most cases the 12 year old just has a few more responsibilities so is a little more adult is all.

Answer 9

not really. homeschooling is really a way to help with lots of stuff:

get rid of bullies:

when you are homeschooled, your child won't get beat up by bullies.

get the right education:

sometimes a school might just make your child learn what THEY want your child to leanr. homeschooling lets the parents teach their children what the parents want them to learn.

go on more field trips:

you cna learn more as a homeschooler cause at public school you have only so much time to learn a subject. in homeschool you can learn about flowers for five hours if your parents let you.

no stress:

you don't have to wake up at 6 am to get up, showered, dressed, and eat b4 school if you are homeschooled.

that is just some of the many things i want to point out.

Answer 10

Nahh...every homeschooled kid I know still acts like a kid. Except having great manners, that is. They bust loose when they get to the park and they know how to play. They still say "awww mom, do I have to?" when it comes to doing school work and chores. Now, the trend in public schools for many is to dress above their years and do things they have no business doing, like smoking and drinking.

I feel like kids grow up too fast when they are under the influence of other kids that are growing up too fast.

Like you, I'm saying some, not all....okay?