My ex and I broke up because I thought he was verbally abusive. During fights he would swear at me call me names like ***** or c@#$ and slut, whore etc. He is VERY sorry and says it would never happen again but I dont think that a person who thinks its okay to say stuff like that really gets it.
Anyone have any opinions about this?
Guys.....have you spoken to awoman you say you love that way?
BTW it was totally uncalled for. There was never a fight that occured that would warrent it. One night he went offon melike that because I was looking out the window of a restaurant we were at and he thought I was thinking of someone else. I was watching the traffic.
2006-12-21 13:23:35 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Oh, no. His angry reaction because he thought you were THINKING of someone else is a real problem. He obviously has control issues and is verbally abusive. This will only get worse if he thinks he can get away with it. Dump him now, it is absolutely unacceptable to allow someone to treat you that way. Abusers are always "really sorry after." That's how they maintain control--through emotional manipulation. Next, you'll be "staring" at the guy behind the counter and "thinking of cheating on him" or some other crazy thing. GET OUT NOW!!
2006-12-21 13:27:46 · answer #1 · answered by rainchaser77 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would drop him in a New York minute. He is a creep who has little or no respect for you and I would bet he would eventually escalate things from verbal abuse to physical abuse. No person deserves that type of treatment. I have been married 38 years and have never spoken to my wife like that even during and argument. There is just no way he can justify that behavior, outside of being mentally challenged than my response to that would be seek counseling but don't come back.
You sound like a pretty intelligent woman, and there are plenty of good guys out there that have been taught to respect not only women but themselves in the process of growing up that would be a much better match than this infantile low life.
Even if you have to endure the holidays without this guy you will find that you may enjoy them better by being free of this slug. One thing to remember if the guy you are with cannot love himself than he is not prepared to love you, and the young man you have talked about has issues you cannot solve.
2006-12-21 13:33:43 · answer #2 · answered by John E 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband is a truck driver and has the proverbial trucker's mouth... he will swear without even realizing it... However, it sounds to me that this boy's problem isn't so much swearing as it is being abusive and controlling... My first husband never swore but was emotionally and physically abusive and did things such as what you noted (with the window at the restaurant). Good thing you got out while you did...count your blessings and consider it was a learning experience.
2006-12-21 13:27:25 · answer #3 · answered by aligal8 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good for you for getting out of that relationship. It sounds like he has some major issues like jealousy. The person who is verbally abusive like that, along with being insecure and overly jealous, is more likely to become physically abusive later on.
You did yourself a tremedous favour by breaking up with him. I just hope that the next girl he dates has enough sense to do what you did and end it before it gets out of hand.
2006-12-21 13:28:03 · answer #4 · answered by Ashlee S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ive been through that before. abuse is such a horible thing for anyone to go through even women. love is never meant to be like that at all especially a relationship.it's (for me) a good thing that you broken up becuase it couldve evolved into physical abuse and being there before it is a terrifying and life threatning exsperience.but do you still have feelings for him? if so think carefully and ask yourself do i really need him?.but this is a merly an opinion i cant run your life nor know what you really want or need. godbless
2006-12-21 13:43:13 · answer #5 · answered by christina bedingfield 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's the language, per se, that is the problem. You can be verbally abusive without using slang words. It's the fact that he's verbally abusive that sucks. Why would you want to stay with someone who treats you like that? Bail!
2006-12-21 13:26:40 · answer #6 · answered by yodadoe 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
omg, don't take him back, he sounds like a lunatic. he needs some anger management classes.
i would never let a man talk to me that way.
girl, you need to have some more respect for yourself. you only gave him permission to hurt you like that with those words and if you take him back you are only going to hurt yourself again.
My boyfriend would NEVER talk to a woman like that, even if he was angry. NEVER. It's disrespectful and just a glimpse that he is capable of other forms of abuse.
Just stay away from him and pray that another girl is not affected by his abuse.
2006-12-21 13:27:26 · answer #7 · answered by Nikki 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Once abusive always abusive. If it happened repeatedly as I think it did from what you wrote above then you are better off without him. Don't go back to him if he says "it will never happen again" because it will over and over and over.
2006-12-21 13:25:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't ever talk to a woman like that, whether it was my girlfriend/wife or otherwise. I do swear around girls sometimes if I know they are comfortable with it (like in jokes and stuff,) but I wouldn't ever curse them like that. It's super low class.
I don't think you should put up with it.
2006-12-21 13:26:45 · answer #9 · answered by Elvis W 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Having an argument is one that, but that kind of stuff is over the line. Give him his walking papers. Let him abuse someone else. You don't need that crap. There are better "men" out there....trust me.
2006-12-21 13:25:41 · answer #10 · answered by QueenChristine 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋