I need to know if I need to report this. Was what happened to me rape?

Question

I'm 18 and a freshman in college at Ohio State and I was a virgin until two weeks ago. I was at a house party and I was drinking (I know I know I shouldn't have been.) Anyhow this guy started making out with me and one thing led to another and before I knew it we were in a dark bedroom in the back of the house and he was on top of me. I tried to get away and struggled for a bit but he was bigger than me so I couldn't. I wanted to scream out for him to stop but I didn't. When he was inside me it hurt so much I can't even describe. When it was over I was crying and he just left the room. I feel like this scrumbag ruined my life. I was saving myself for marriage. Now all I think about is that I want to die.

I found out who he was. He's a star player on our football team. If I report this it will make the news. Maybe even national news becuase I've been told he's really, really good and a lot of people across the country know who he his.

I just don't know what to do.

Answer 1

I'll pass on your question.

But you signed up here to ask about this and chose the name boob girl?

Readers, draw your own conclusions.

Answer 2

You could talk to the police about it. They could give you some direction. It sounds like he probably put something into your drink if you were unable to speak. The problem is that it's too late to prove it now. If he did put something into your drink, then yes, he definately did rape you. If not and you never said no, it probably wouldn't hold water in court. However, I still think you should report him because if he did this to you, he will probably do it again. And even if you can't convict him, it will stay on his record. That way if/when he does it again to some other poor girl, it will be on his record. That may be the very thing that puts him where he belongs. I know it's hard, but if you feel like he raped you, you need to report it in order to save someone else from going though this again. Please do all women a favor and report this. Also, there is a rape hotline, look in the blue pages of your phone book and call them. They can give you some suport. Good Luck!

Answer 3

You need to report this guy to the police. This was rape. It was not your fault. You did nothing wrong. This guy invaded your body in the worst possible way. Just because you were drinking does not give him a free pass to have sex with you. I know it's scary, because you probably feel like no one will believe you, especially since this guy is a star athlete, but he can't get away with this behavior. You're probably feeling pretty powerless right now, but you have the power to fight back by reporting this guy. If you have any friends or know any witnesses who were at the party, it will help a lot. They can help substantiate your story. If the case is publicized, it's possible other women will come forward (I'm hoping this guy isn't a serial rapist, but I wouldn't put anything past someone this disgusting).
You also need to make sure you take care of yourself. I know it's difficult, but if he didn't use a condom, you need to get yourself checked for STDs and make sure you aren't pregnant. You should also talk to a therapist and/or call a rape hotline [phone]-HOPE is a free, confidential, 24-hour hotline you can call). If you have someone at your church you can talk to, like a youth pastor, that will help you cope as well. I'm so sorry this happened to you, and I hope this guy goes down in flames. I know it seems impossible now, but you will feel better with time. Don't be ashamed of your emotions, or if it takes a lot of time for you to feel any better. Do what you need to do for yourself.

Answer 4

I am so sorry this happened to you! First of all drinking or drunk or not. No, means no! There are no exceptions to this rule. You need to contact the rape crisis hot line and talk with someone. Unfortunately, you have waited to long to have a rape test kit performed and all evidence on your body is gone. However, I would definitely call the Rape Crisis Hot line listed in the yellow pages and speak with a counselor. Then make a decision. I don't care who he is, he must abide by values and morals of respect for all. God Bless you, Please talk to someone a trained counselor regarding this. You will be best served speaking with a trained professional. I would not worry in the least about who he is how many people know him, how popular he is. Wrong is Wrong. God bless****

Answer 5

I agree with the other comments that you didn't consent and he went on anyway, which is rape. I have been married for almost 3 years and my wife and I have discussed this and even when married, if a woman says no, stop, or attemps to leave or push a man away thats what it means, no. Ask yourself, if your car was rear-ended, would you call the police? A crime is a crime and needs to be handled as such. I wish you the best in dealing with this.

Answer 6

It is normal for you to feel that way, but No is NO. If he had sex against your will then you have just defined the term RAPE. It'll probably be put down to a lesser charge in the end, but he violated you, and that should not be taken for granted. Hopefully there won't be a next time, but if it comes up open your mouth and scream the house party down!!!

Answer 7

In my opinion, you were raped. I am so sorry for what happened to you. He's a jerk, and deserves jail time. Unfortunately, the world we live in places jocks above the rest of us. I don't know if I'd report it if I were you or not, to be honest. maybe there's someone you trust that you could talk to about it? Be extremely careful who you talk to though, until you decide what it is you want to do. But, don't let him win - he didn't ruin your life! He took something that wasn't his to take, and yes, it changed you, but the core of you, the person you are remains the same. do what you need to do to heal yourself and move on with your life. The best way to win is to be a success in whatever path you take!

Good luck!

Answer 8

REPORT IT! It does not matter if he is the star player or the water boy. Try to find as many people as you can who were at the party to defend you. If it was a star player, your going to be in a uphill battle. The team will try to keep it quiet. They will support him and call you a liar. Athletes get special treatment. Report it and expose this dirtbag.

Answer 9

You need to talk to the police and tell them exactly what you typed here. Try talking to a woman officer and she will be able to advise you on how to handle this. It sounds like rape to me, but unless you made it perfectly clear to him that you wanted to stop,it could be considered consentual sex. I dont know for sure. But please talk to someone even if its your mom, sister, cousin, counseler. Because if you dont talk about this it will stay inside you and eat you alive to the point where you really will destroy your life. I know you were saving yourself for marriage and this is terrible. That stupid guy should be shot. I'm so angry because what gives men the right to do these things? I believe that if you talk to someone and take the proper steps to heal your soul, you will still have a beautiful and productive life. If you let it ruin you, your life will be miserable. Please talk to the police and get help from someone with the ablility to help you. Best of luck to you, and my heart is with you.

Answer 10

Did you ever say stop or no? cause it sounds to me like it is kinda mixed as if there were a little struggle but you gave in, and you never said stop or noould it be you wanted it, but now you wish it didnt happen cause you were drunk. Shouldnt be drinking, and you would have had a clearer head. Now ruin his life cause you were drunk, maybe since you didnt say no, he thought you were ok with it. Only you know the truth!

Answer 11

Hmm..this is tough..if i were you i would def. report this, but there is a problem i believe. You might not even do much by reporting it probably, because if you didnt scream or really try and stop him, he might of thought you were enjoying it. But unless he saw u crying he should have known you weren't joking..anyways i'd say go ahead and report it!