Right now all he does is lashes out (hits, kicks, bits) at the kids in his preschool room and the director of the facility when he is put in the office for "time out". He will, for no reason at all, walk up and hit other kids. Yesterday there was a little girl playing with the play microwave, my son was not playing with her, he walked up to her and intentionally slammed her fingers in the door of the play microwave. Is it too much of a school environment or is does it seem too borring for him? I cant figure him out.
2006-12-21 08:41:37 · 7 answers · asked by ktbug995 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
He does talk really well. He just cant communicate well. I will tell him that he is being mean to the kids at school and he will say "my truck is red". Or I will ask him why he hits he will say "because i'm happy".
2006-12-21 08:53:58 · update #1
My husband and I(his father) DO NOT fight, never have. He is an only child. He has an uncle with aspergers disorder (he cant control his actions). We are currently seeing a behavior specialist.
2006-12-21 09:10:35 · update #2
He is currently grounded from his toys and tv. We made him stop watching tv shows or games that have any aggression long ago.
2006-12-21 09:13:15 · update #3
Lead by example. Be very descriptive in expressing your emotions to him. "Mommy is very angry with you for hitting." or "Good job putting away your toys. Mommy is very happy" Because toddlers can't reason well, a good thing to do would be to teach him to understand his emotions. Have anyone who spend time with him do the same. Remember when you were teaching colors? You referred to EVERYTHING by it's color? It's the same theory. Explain every emotion. Ask him if he's mad, sad, happy... repetition is key. Pretty soon he'll pick up on it and will be able to identify how he's feeling. I'm doing this with my 2 1/2 year old son right now and it's working good. he'll say "Isaac's mad!" and I'll ask "Are you mad because......" Just knowing I understand and validate his emotions seem to calm him down. He still has the occasional outburst, but no nothing like it was before.
Good luck with your tot.. It will all work out for you :)
2006-12-21 10:44:26 · answer #1 · answered by ♥ BuffaloGirl ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you need to ask yourself where he is learning this kind of behavior these type of actions are too complex for a three year old to concoct on their own, is there a lot of fighting at home? is there a Lot of inappropriate TV viewing going on is he learning it from siblings if so then you as a parent might be able to (eventually) correct his behavior but don't kid yourself it AIN'T GONNA BE EASY!!!! or fast i seriously think you should make it your mission to educate yourself on the matter both through books/video and professionals, this is not the place because the good answers just don't come fast enough for such a serious problem and without a lot of education on such a problem you won't have the means to decide which answers to follow it would be trial and error and i believe your child deserves and requires a far more direct and proven approach.
Best of luck Tom AL USA
2006-12-21 17:06:12 · answer #2 · answered by whizbang 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter went through a really bad mean streak when she was 3 1/2. But, it was only happening at day care. I talked to her, spanked her and punished her. But, it wasn't until I told her that everything she does to a child at school I was going to do back to her - then she stopped it. It made her think about how she makes others feel. When I tried to explain that to her - she didn't want to hear me. But, when it became reality my message was loud and clear.
BTW - that boy doesn't need a screening - he is playing games with you by not answering the question. He is much smarter than you think. I do believe it is spanking time. Talk first, spank and then talk again.
2006-12-21 17:12:32 · answer #3 · answered by Amber 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's apparently 'angry' about something -grounding DOES NOT FLY --you have to remove what is most near & dear to him-it's tough love -but i have seen it work-as for the toys give him blocks to build-bang -smash whatever-and maybe 'boxing gloves 'with the whole 'boxing kit' you can get them cheap for young kids -possibly a good way for him to deal with the 'lashing out' when he statrs-simply tell him to 'put on the gloves'-and you guys put your's on too-but with not punches -hugs and 'mommy-cooties'-he will break-and get to the heart of the matter-good luck
2006-12-21 18:16:41 · answer #4 · answered by barely40lookingatmy80s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he could use an old fashion butt whippin. He's 3 can't he talk. He is just being down right mean and that should be stopped before he gets older or he'll be cussing you when he's about 10 yrs old.
2006-12-21 16:46:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
He needs to learn that what hurts others also hurts him. If he hits, swat his butt. If he kicks, swat his butt (don't kick him back..that's a little extreme). If he bites, bite him back.
Until he realizes that things that hurt others hurt him too he's just going to continue to do it. His teachers who are putting him in "time out" aren't doing anything for this situation. What kind of punishment is time out anyway? He smashes a little girls fingers in a microwave and all he has to do is sit in the principle's office for a few minutes? That's not going to teach him a THING.
2006-12-21 16:46:00 · answer #6 · answered by CelebrateMeHome 6 · 2⤊ 4⤋
Get him evaluated by a child psychologist. He's a little young for a formal diagnosis, but they will give you more reasoned input than anyone here will.
2006-12-21 16:44:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋