It was just a few minutes ago. I was listening to the Trans-Siberian Orchestra when my gramps waddled in sheepishly and attempted to get me in a headlock. I squawked in pure terror at the hideous sight of his bare lard barrels. He seemed to be gallavanting in slow motion around me, mumbling his native tongue under his breath in a sinister manner, while I was staring, mouth agape, watching his soiled and unsanitary lard crevices bobbing up and down. You see, he isn't due for his annual bath until December 28th. Anyway, I exuberantly stood up and told him he must vacate the premises. He did not heed my request, so I located my tranquilizer gun and shot him in the liver. He began to sway uncontrollably and flew down the stairs, his gastrointestinal tract seemed to wave at me as he passed by my range of vision. I quivered slightly as I watched the eyesore of a corpse soar down the staircase. I wandered down after him, and found his futile remains draped across the mahogany staircase. It was then that the realization of my actions sunk in. What should I do about my gramps?
2006-12-21 08:26:09 · 9 answers · asked by Reginalda 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Pickle him and cut him up into little pieces and throw the pieces in the ceiling fan to see what kind of distance gramps can get!!
2006-12-21 08:41:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow! that was harsh but necessary. leave a red and green ticket on his head and santa will take him away and refurbish him. He should be back in time for his annual headlock and bath. only do not shoot him next time. nice writing.
2006-12-21 16:30:39 · answer #2 · answered by ConstElation 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perform some experiments on the interactions between human tissues and nitroglycerine.
2006-12-21 16:32:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call the morgue and a firetruck with a big hose. When he blows it's gonna be nasty.
2006-12-21 16:35:38 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Bury him in the back yard; next to Grandma.
2006-12-21 16:40:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You seem to have a very active imagination - be creative!!! Christmas dinner is one solution.....
2006-12-21 16:29:02 · answer #6 · answered by YDoncha_Blowme 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I thought i had seen the stupidest question a few day's ago but this top's it.This is not even funny.Please don't waste our time with this stupidity!!!!!!!!!!
2006-12-21 16:31:36 · answer #7 · answered by flossie mae 5 · 0⤊ 4⤋
Wow....this is like Deja Vu....
2006-12-21 16:29:19 · answer #8 · answered by Samurai Jack 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
WRITE A FICTION BOOK YOU WOULD MAKE MILLIONS
2006-12-21 16:30:44 · answer #9 · answered by *PEACE BEGINS WITH A SMILE* 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋