Parents, do you have any advice on how I can stay sane with all the incidences that my kids surprise me with?

Question

I have a 17 1/2 year old and a 13 year old boys, I am just so constantly worried that something is going to happen to them - how do you do it?

Answer 1

no this is not a big problem,their approaching their teenagehood and their world around them,life will teach them what is good and bad.

Answer 2

I think it's darned hard. Teenage boys have been compared to hand grenades with the pins pulled out, and based on my experiences that isn't a bad analogy.

I don't have any simple answers, other than simultaneously keeping an eye on them and trying to have faith that you've brought them up well, so eventually this period will be over and they'll turn out well. Don't lie to yourself or be blind to what they're doing, but also don't be paranoid or confuse acting out or rebellion or just plain stupid stuff with their being bad kids.

It's a real balancing act trying to treat your kids with respect and yet knowing full well that they're capable of getting into some real scrapes. Sometimes it's even hard to evaluate how serious the long-term consequences of these scrapes will be.

I'm sure others will write you with some better, more solid advice, but I'll leave you with some concrete examples of young men - friends of mine - who turned their parents' hair white and turned out okay.

Guy #1: Was kicked out of his mother's house for huffing and laziness. He's now a multimillionaire and supports an extended family.

Guy #2: Wore long dresses and had multiple piercings in high school as a form of social protest. Experimented with blowing things up with dynamite. He's now a safety officer with a major science lab and has settled down with a wife and is a pillar of the community.

Guy #3: Was slouchy, morose, wore clothes that were falling apart, and failed many classes in high school. He's now earning a six-figure salary, put a nephew through college, and has helped many friends and family members through rough times.

These were all guys that had people convinced that they were complete and utter losers when they were kids, yet they all turned out to be very successful and, more importantly, they're good people.

Hang in there and have faith that you're a good person and you're raising your kids right. Most of the time it gets better.

Answer 3

Well tell them they are only alound to have sex when they are married and teach them the rules of life and say that "i dont want you to make the same mistake as.......... did" or wait till they have done something wrong and then tell them how bad it is and if it does not work i am a conciler so contact me at [e-mail] or [e-mail] and i will give you sme good advice and ill speak to your children on msn or something because we may live i really diffrent places ok and dont worry i wontcharge you anthing ok i am just giving a freind a hellping hand
from Leanne

Answer 4

You just need to talk to them. Make sure they understand what's right and what's wrong and if they do something wrong-don't let them get away with it!!! Show them that for every action there are consequences. It doesn't matter if your older son is 17 or 7 - if he does something stupid you have to make sure he understands and realizes that he shouldn't have done it and if it's something that puts him in danger you should make sure he won't do it again! It's only yours (and their fathers) responsibility to put these kids in the right track, so they can have a happy and successful life when they become adults!

Answer 5

beat em once in a while to remind em who mom is.... haha, kidding! take em out on a date sometime to maybe a pizza restaurant or the movies. Remind them you love them and want them to feel like they are the most important people to you in the world. Maybe have your husband or a relative hint to them that a cheap, but thoughtful present would be nice from them once in a while.
Also, call them more often just to have casual conversations. If they think you are more friend than parent, you can keep tabs with what they are up to.

Answer 6

I drink. No, seriously, I pray and trust in the goodness of the world. It is so easy to get completely freaked out by the worries of the world. It can make a momma CRAZY! I also talk about things with my hubby or a fellow mommy. Just talking about the worries can make them less scary.

Answer 7

My kids are young yet, 18 months and 6 months, but when they hit those ages I will be freaking out myself! I even worry about how to handle their first sleepover at a friends house, LOL. A pager or cell phone are nice because you can check in on them at will. Good luck mom!

Answer 8

Laugh becuse if you don't you will develope a medical condition. Believe it or not you will actually miss this in a few years. Sick huh? Sort of like forgetting the childbirth pains. All worth it but hard to live through sometimes.

Answer 9

Stay on them, make sure they are where they say they are and TRUST THE LORD. Check their room for drugs and if you find other things keep those to yourself. You may want to get drug tests from the pharmacy. Keep reminding them about the long term bad effects of drugs. Remind them that one moment of pleasure can ruin the rest of their life. Love them and fill their minds with the word of God.

Remember, our motto, IN GOD WE TRUST.

Answer 10

Sit down and make deals with them like if you stay out of trouble for a whole month ill give each of you 25.00 andmake it longer but stay the same price.

Answer 11

just be there if they ask for advice which they seldom do, because when you are a teenager you know everthing. I wish all my problems would have happened when iwas 17 and knew everything, just pray alot