Does Anyone Understand the way I'm feeling? Give me some feed back please!!?

Question

just got in touch with dad and relatives last year my 2 aunts came 2 see last summer my dad didn't come yet i haven't seen my dad in 10 years (long story) now i'm 18 he has 2 other kids and at first i was excited but now i feel as if i don't belong and i never talk to any of them because i feel akward calling at first i was a little jealous because i feel he's more of their father than mine since he's with them and knows them i'm the odd one out. i don't even care 2 see them i just lost interest over time. i just feel alone and i'm not close with my mother and i have a little sis by her so it's as if i'm by myself and have noone my dad's sisters and i are close but there r times i still feel like something is missing i see them but i don't see me fitting i even felt something inside when my aunt said she saw my brother and sister the other day cause i honestly don't care and i can't help the way i feel i know it's wrong but i feel the need to keep my distant wtih my dad and them

when he left me and my mom in jamaica he met the woman that he has kids with now him and my mom were never married we just lost contact when i was nine because of a telephone call that my dad says my mom ran up when she called and tlked 2 his grandmother. he hung up and the next time she called the number was blocked and then we moved out the state so thats how the lost of contact happened but since i've found him he hasn't come to see me once

i'm only distant with my dad and my younger brother and sister my aunts r fine with me i have no prblms with them

Answer 1

Why would you expect to feel close to a man who abandoned you 10 years ago, and was a father to 2 other children, rather than you? Of course you feel left out-- you have been left out since you were 8 years old. You don't want to get close to your "dad" because he ditched you when you were a kid and don't want to open yourself up to more pain.
I think what you're feeling, given the situation, is perfectly normal. I can't imagine wanting to get close to them either, they're basically strangers.
It's not "wrong" to want to keep your distance-- after all, isn't that what your dad did for the last 10 years? He was wrong then, not you now.

Answer 2

I feel for you but you are the only one who can change the situation and your feelings. I'm not making excuses for your Dad but maybe he feels guilty for running out on you yet creating a second family. With his second family he has a chance to get it right this time since he didn't do it right with you. You might need to take the initiative and go see him. If nothing comes of it then don't feel bad or unlovable or anything like that. He just might not be able to overcome his guilt but then again it could be a good start for a realtionship. The main thing is that you see yourself as a wonderful, loving and lovable person. Good luck to you!

Answer 3

i know how you feel my parents divorced when i was 2. im 16 i didnt know my dad until i was 10. now that i live with him im the middle child the only girl and my dad doesnt want to have any thing to do with me my mom doesnt stay in touch like she used to and my 24 year old sis is out there some where and im stuck here with that empty feeling. but how i get through all of this is by having friends especially 2 of them whos family is my family

Answer 4

Try not to be upset, your dad has made a decision, and has been keeping his actions for the pass 10 years.

I think, he knows his actions are wrong, so does his sisters. Your aunt (his sis) still talks to you, as they know, the pain you're going through.

Although they don't mean a thing to you, try to be nice to them, as they are the only people who are linked to your dad, hopefully someday, your dad will come to his senses, just be patient.

Answer 5

I understand..my mom and dad divorced when i was 11 and he had other kids with 2 other women. But through my teenage years I always felt like something was missing...and I needed a father figure in my life...then I begin to cry out and ask God why..Why did my father leave us and abandon us(his family) for another woman? God, I need a father figure in my life... Then I begin to open up the bible and the book opened up to the scripture that said .."I will be a Father to the Fatherless"... when I saw that I begin to cry, because it was God speaking to me and it spoke directly to my heart. So I began to seek God, and turn to Him. Looking to Him as my only Father that will never let me down. The Father that I always longed for.

Throughout our life we can't control the decisions other people make, but we can control the decisions we make. Forgive your dad, seek God and ask God to be that Father Figure you're missing in your life. He loves you unconditionally and He will never turn His back on You. He is Faithful....Ask Him(Jesus Christ) into your heart this very hour....you can read pray this prayer on my myspace page: http://www.myspace.com/godannointedme2

God Bless You...You can never go wrong with trusting your heart to Jesus Christ.

Answer 6

Why dont u talk to your aunts maybe they could help u understand.