a few weeks ago i asked about my daughter.
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AiibNuWQMx9ye.PH6i9rsbUgBgx.?qid=20061201155634AAlvumP
now its gotten worse she has moved in with him and his family she said my house does not feel like home with out him there. she said she wants to get on with her life and be growen up she is only 17 she told me that she didnt want to see me on a night time only in the day when he is at work. ive told her not to ask me for money or for a lift any where.ive told her if she is old enough to move out she is old enough to fend for herself. but i have told her im always her day and night if she needs me.
im worried now that ive been to harsh on her.
2006-12-21 02:09:39 · 17 answers · asked by kjw 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Maybe a little harsh to her. U need to talk to her and tell her that u will always be there to back up for her. So that way she knows where to go if anything and knows she can be safe. There has to be a reason why she moved out and plus its an experience at that age everyone now wants freedom! Good luck with her!
2006-12-21 02:19:09 · answer #1 · answered by smile114 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its called tough love, it works, and you did the right thing. As for the harshness, again you are correct-its a harsh world out here, with more boundary's in different situations, in all sorts of places, than you would get at home. She is very lucky to have a mum like you...so many don't care nowaday's. She will thank you for this harshness later on in her life.
2006-12-21 13:44:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have done exactly the right thing. If she thinks she is old enough to fend for herself then let her go and do it and see how damned hard it is. All I will suggest is that you take up any offer of when she can see you even if it is during the day as if things go wrong she will need to know you support her, whatever her decision.
2006-12-21 02:45:41 · answer #3 · answered by Bagpuss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you've been harsh, if she wants to behave like a grown up it does mean not relying on your parents for handouts and standing on your own two feet... maybe she'll find out the grass isn't always greener and being an adult can be hard.
However, do emphasise to her you'll always be there for her and that you love her etc. She'll realise in time how much that is worth. Good luck.
2006-12-21 02:16:27 · answer #4 · answered by Miss J 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The more you are going to show negative feelings for her boyfriend the more she is going to resent you,Ive been through the same thing tell her you dont except the relationship but you are there for her,its tough but she will find out for herself what a lowlife loser he is and only then will she realise, there will be heartache and tears but as her mum dont say I told you so ,bite your tongue and be there for her,ask her round for lunch show her what a cosy warm homely house she has left behind.
2006-12-21 08:00:43 · answer #5 · answered by candyfloss 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she has emotional issues and needs to feel like she is wanted by someone. My brothers girlfriend said her mum threw her out just to let her stay with him because she is so desperate for him to love her.
Try sitting her down and telling hr how much you love her and you don't want her to do what she's doing because you need her. Don't tell her not to do it, ask. And don't make her feel guilty. Just say you are worried that this will take her away from you and you would never want that.
2006-12-21 06:59:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you have made her face up to reality and not live in a dream world she will soon see how much she still needs you when they start to get on each others nerves etc and will come running back all you can do is be there for her when she does and don't tell her i told you so
2006-12-21 02:30:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When she realises that she cant to it without you she will be back. I was like that with my girlfriend when i was 16, but i soon realised i could not manage and i went crawling back. Life is hard.
Trust me, she will be back, bide your time.
As for the harsh bit, maybe you were slightly harsh, buts its tough love.
2006-12-21 02:16:43 · answer #8 · answered by Starbucks27 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its called tough love. There comes a point when you have to let go, this is it. Let her make her decisions, it doesn't make you a bad mum. She know's you'll be there if she really needs you.
2006-12-21 02:12:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋