She is 22 and a senior in Graphic Design at the University. She got a C+ in the most important class in her major (which is considered failing) and will not graduate on time. She feels that the teacher is being unduly harsh with her and has written an email to her her advisor (who is also the teacher of the class). She feels she is only points away from a passing grade which would be a B-. She is prepared to go higher up if her teacher is not reasonable. She asked me if I'd help her out if need be and I told her that I was sorry for her misfortune and that I thought she deserved a much better grade. Since she is 22 and a senior, the university may frown upon her mother going to bat for her and I'm sure she could do this all on her own and assured her that she could. Told her this was a setback and if she needed to retake the class she could. She was really upset and said I don't support her because I won't help her speak to the faculty.
2006-12-20 22:36:51 · 8 answers · asked by Oh Wise One 2 in Education & Reference ➔ Higher Education (University +)
You either pass or you don't. Even if she is "points away from passing," the bottom line is that she IS points away. She didn't pass. She needs to grow up, take responsibility for her own actions/grades, and re-take the class instead of whining. And, I've never heard of a college that considers a C+ to be failing.
2006-12-21 02:10:46 · answer #1 · answered by ty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your daughter is an adult, and as such the university should not release any information regarding her scores, grades, etc. Rather than intervene by going "to the teacher" as you would with a child, help her prepare to go to the "higher ups" (dean, provost, university president.)
Many times young adults do not really know the fine art of conflict management or how to complain effectively (they whine! "my professor doesn't like me" "I need to pass", etc) Help her to gather her ammunition, papers, grades, etc. Have her make a point by point list of her issues (not her emotions) to present her facts ... do not blame, have her practice her argument in front of you or other older adults (like it or not, we're from a different era, and expect to be talked to differently). Dress her up like a professional, and send her on her way.
If you want, ride with her, walk her to her appointment, but let her fight her own battles! If she loses, stand by her, tell her she did her best, but sometime we just lose... but if she wins, she will win more than her grade, she will win confidence! But she needs to be prepared that she may have really earned her grade.
Good luck!
2006-12-21 10:51:14 · answer #2 · answered by TLC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, it sounds to me like you are a great parent.
However, you can tell your daughter that professors are prohibited by law from speaking to parents about a student's grades. (Exceptions can only be made with written permission from the student, and even with written permission, we usually refer such matters to the Dean)
I understand your daughter's anger, and I also understand why she wishes to have your support on this issue. It is clear that she has it, and that's a good thing, since it is indeed a parent's place to be supportive of their child's desires.
I can also tell you, in all honesty, that faculty do not much care for parental intervention in matters of grades. Nor are we usually moved by student appeals. We call it "grade grubbing."
Professors go to a great deal of trouble to make grading systems both reasonable and fair. At bottom, grades are earned, not given. Point systems are in place for a reason, and are generally not up for debate. (If I were to raise one student's grade, then ethically, I would have to raise them all.)
It is clear to me that you want the best for your daughter, and are indeed being supportive. You think she should have gotten a better grade, and you want her to learn how to stand up for herself, and speak reasonably to persons in authority. Sounds like good parenting to me.
2006-12-21 23:21:51 · answer #3 · answered by X 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Repeating a year can be a good thing. catastrophic on the spot but 10 years later it could be an asset.
i missed a year in the financial area, and today ... i am better than the others. I studied much harder that year and ... today i know much more than others having the same curriculum!!!
make your decision wisely because she seems to be young ...
may GOD inspire you
2006-12-21 06:44:43 · answer #4 · answered by tomcat 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can be a parent or you can leave her alone.
Thats what I think of intervene. Dam straight if thats what you call it, do it. Its called being a parent, parents help the children because they are kinda resposible for them. I thank whatever and whoever runs this show that my Mom and Dad and Granparents were ACTIVE in my youth, and now I thank them as they lay in their graves.
2006-12-21 06:53:46 · answer #5 · answered by Yawn Gnome 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Most people who leave college never go back. Yes, you should because it sounds like trouble is ahead. At 22 she can right her academic ship which is sailing into troubled waters. Ahoy
2006-12-21 06:44:59 · answer #6 · answered by Billy Dee 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Be there as her moral support but not her lawyer.
2006-12-21 07:40:40 · answer #7 · answered by rezruf 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No.
2006-12-21 06:38:04 · answer #8 · answered by bkanastoplus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋