When my parents married 27 years ago(they split about six years ago)my dad was in the Royal Green Jackets and he always regretted giving it up,even though he did this because they had me and he didn't want me to have the unsettled moving around life that this can bring,and at times i have felt bad for him.This is why when he split from my mum and was dating like a teenager,always with girls younger than me and my brother,i could understand the reason for his bachular ways.There was a girl he was with for 5 years but she ended up breaking HIS heart,but other than this he lived life like he had never before,and he loved it.That was until six months ago when he met his older and less appealing bride to be,YES I DID SAY BRIDE!.Now if i knew that this was that he really wanted or if he looked happy then i could relax but everyone i know has agreed that there is something unsettling and strange about this woman and i just can't figure out what it is.This then put with his past history,
2006-12-20 18:56:12 · 19 answers · asked by grandmasangel 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First, can you get your hands on some arsenic?
2006-12-20 18:58:57 · answer #1 · answered by Frank R 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you don't say what is actually wrong with this woman apart from "something unsettling and strange". I think that you just cant handle the fact that they are getting married and that you wont be no1 any more. Of course your dad doesn't look happy with you moaning about how he lives his life, he did what he thought was right at the time for you and your brother but now is the time in his life when he must do what he feels is right for HIM. I suspect he knows you don't want him to get married and is tense when you are there. i bet he cant wipe the smile off of his face when you aren't there
2006-12-20 19:11:48 · answer #2 · answered by polydoodle 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Grandmasangel",
I think that you should go to the Wedding hoping ; both for your Dad and his new wife that everything will be OK and that they will be happy together.
They must be very much in love and committed to each other because they have decided to marry after only 6 months.
You say that the new bride is unappealing; but she appeals to your Dad, and he is the one who is marrying her!
You say your Dad is unhappy too!!
Marrying someone with children is harder than marrying someone without children because you also "marry the children too" They are both in love, but you and your friends seem to be very negative about the new wife. After all, if any one's worst fault in life is that there is "something strange" about them they probably arn't doing so bad compared to "drunkards, thieves and axe murderers".
Perhaps Bride Lady is strange because she feels shy and awkward with you and your brother.
Perhaps part of the reason that your Dad seems unhappy is that he wants you and your brother to be happier with his new lover.
"Grandmasangel" at the wedding be happy for them both and wish them both well. Give yourselves a few years to get to know each other well and things may turn out a lot better than you can imagine now.
Good Luck to you all !!
"The Mac"
2006-12-20 19:33:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have often thought over the last few years how it's funny that as I have got older the relationship of parent / child seems to be reversing and I find myself worrying about them, supporting them etc. It's important to tell him that you don't think what he is doing it the right thing but do it in a way that won't mean that he pushes you away. Tell him you are worried about him and try and encourage him to give it more time. And in trying to deal with it think about how a teenager would react to a parent objecting to their new girlfriend / boyfriend and that will help you.
2006-12-20 19:23:19 · answer #4 · answered by roisindu2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if there something so terrible about this woman that you really don't trust... then i suggest you voice your opinions, that is the only think you can really do. You opinion counts for something but again you can't dictate your father's life for him. You should bring it up in conversation only let him know where you stand with the whole marriage thing with this other woman. in the end, you would have given your two cents and he will either take your comment into consideration or not.
2006-12-23 07:49:00 · answer #5 · answered by Vanessa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As hard as it maybe we all have to learn from our own mistakes there are very few of us that learn from the mistakes of others!
So, if it really bothers you then talk about it and explain why(focus on his happiness not his bride to be's strangeness). At the end of the day this is your dad's decision, if it does all go wrong be there for him and make sure he knows he can always count on you!
2006-12-20 19:13:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My dearest concerned! Maybe your Dad got to the end of his bachelor days with younger woman & found someone more his age & who shares most likely his interests in life. Maybe he is not making the right choice....who knows....his adult enough to be able to get out or continue with his choices in life. Ask him if he is happy & if he says yes then let it in God's hands. Dont you look unhappy as this can cause pressure on him & maybe he would like you to be happy for him...maybe thats why he dont look happy around her as some people dont want to accpet her around him...i think you must accept & be there for him as a daughter.....smile...all will work out fine.!
Good luck & merry christmas!
2006-12-20 19:08:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i casn understand u as matters of our parents are somehow ours too but u must understand that it is his life , the same as u wouldnt want that anyone from ur family comes cross with urs .
u must let him take his own decisions even if u are not agree with them , even thou u would maybe know that he will break his heart again ...he must go through it , there is no way to stop him as he would think that u dont understand him and all that
its hard but let him do his thing ... dont get involved too much .
i wish u all the best and a nice xmas !!!
2006-12-20 19:18:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't ask others what they think of her. Ask him.
No-one will ever be right for someone's dad; the dads have to make their own choices. if you are freaked out, do a background check on her. Rather a more mature woman who will know how to treat him than a young air-head who'll run away with his best friend.
Good luck
2006-12-20 19:11:08 · answer #9 · answered by Sugar 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How do you watch your dad ruin his life for the second time on saturday? I dunno.... bring popcorn? Your dad is an adult, and makes his own decisions. I doubt you can really do anything, other than keep your eyes open. Maybe you can catch Ms. Unsettling in the act of doing something devious. Other than that, all you can do is watch and wait.
2006-12-20 19:03:05 · answer #10 · answered by Jack S 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
it's hard sometimes but you have to remember daddy is a big boy now and if he is happy surly that is important.
my daughter didn't like my second wife and made it really clear, however I am very happy except it has damaged my relationship with my daughter.
Don't allow this to drive you and your dad apart, coz you will regret it - I do
HAPPY DAYS
2006-12-20 19:40:58 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋