Should I go out with a girl who is under medication for depression that I just met?

Question

Do you think it's better to become friends for now? because I might trigger something that would affect her so much. I'll be here to support her anyway. Should I hang out with her? What should I do? What do you think guys?

Answer 1

I answered a question almost exactly like this a few days ago. Is she going to stay on her medication or is she trying to stop? How long has she been on the medication for, and has she been in other relationships prior to you? Has she been in a relationship while on the medication? Does she see a psychologist as well as a psychiatrist?

Also, it something you might want to consider is how old both of you are, and your relationship history.

When she has mood swings or gets depressed, just try to talk to her. Although it's unfair for her to get mad at you for no reason, you need to talk to her about it rather than getting mad at her back. I am bipolar, and my boyfriend and I have been together for three years. When I get upset or irrational for no reason, if he just fights back with me, we get into an all out verbal brawl, but if he tells me I'm being irrational, and talks to me calmly about it, it really helps me to understand.

If you fight back with her, it will only fuel her flame, but if you just think to yourself, "I know, she's bipolar (or has depression, whatever your case is)", and then talk to her calmly, maybe she'll realize how she's acting. And, no, bipolar disorder/depression isn't an excuse to fly off the handle. You need to let her know that also. If she is always having mood swings and always being irrational with you, you need to tell her, "I know you're bipolar/depressed, and that's a big influence on the way you act, but you're _____(her age) years old, you're not a little kid, and you need to take responsibility and not always blame your moods on your bipolar disorder/depression."

I hope that didn't sound too much like a speech or essay, and I really hope you figure something out. My father and I are both bipolar, and fortunately I have been able to handle it and have a great relationship with a guy that understands what I'm going through.

Whatever you decide to do with this girl, I wish you luck with your relationship.

Answer 2

Do you listen to music, or play it, or hike in nature, or smoke weed or anything? From what you said about your school schedule, I'd suggest you spend some time wasting time. If all you're worried about (on that front) is getting into a particular (demanding) college, then think about how you'll feel once you actually get there (if the depression doesn't subsume you first). By the way, is the girl of your dreams 100% decided on going to the same college as you? Or you as her? College is only the beginning, and for you, that beginning is coming sooner than you think. Once you are in college you will have to ask yourself: What comes next? Will I ever, in my however-many-years-left of natural life, ever experience TRUE happiness? What happens when I get old and decrepit and horribly close to death, what will I have done with myself? I only say this because up until my senior year of high school I was depressed in much the same manner as you, dealing with divorce, and girl, and school (though I was more cynical about grades than you seem), and then I had a fat reality check to the face when my dad died following my parents divorce. I realized my problems were small compared to the really bad stuff that can happen to me, I guess, and then before I knew it I was gone far away for college and new people were around me and I soon found I loved them, as much as I'd loved anyone, and everything changed, my life was real and good. It really happens.

Answer 3

You will probably agree with me, just be natural and respect your own feeling about it all, you have to be comfortable with her and yourself, depression or not. Depression won't be caused by something that you do or would do, rather it's the sufferer's brain chemical imbalance that creates the lowering of the moods that we know about.

I love a man who has depression, it’s truly not funny for the sufferer. He is taking medication that does not work very well, he’s tried other kinds but still hasn’t found a medication that works well. So, even though he is being treated, he’s still depressed. I don’t know about your friend’s treatment, I hope it works well for her.

Depression is very insidious, what it does to one’s life is not funny, they literally lose interest in just everything, seeing people, working or studying, feeding and caring for themselves properly, lose their libido and taste for life in general. And there is nothing, not outside help that can ameliorate their symptoms but a proper balance of brain chemicals, hence proper medication.

I think that if she’s into seeing you proves that her mood is not on the low, her medication would then work well, therefore her brain chemistry is normal, this makes her a normal person. You won’t have to deal with depressive moods or sadness or anything else like that.

I think that if you are to worry is only if her symptoms come back. Is she ok right now? Then all is good and you shouldn’t be concerned with seeing any show of symptoms. Bear in mind that certain meds affect libido in the negative sense, I hope it’s not her case, as if you’re thinking of seeing her in a romantic way, she might not be all too interested in physical contact and affection. But she’s best placed to tell you about that.

Good luck, and don’t be afraid, depression does not deter my affection and respect for my own love-of-mine, it’s unfortunately a very common condition. But remember, don’t label her with a condition, she’s a person, and an interesting one as you seem to think :)

Answer 4

I think going out with her would be just what the Dr. would order. She's taking the med.s to balance out her chemicals in her body, so the depression will go away. This believe it or not affects over half the people in the US. So treating her like normal, and being her friend would be very wise and considerate of you!

Answer 5

Just because someone is being medicated for depression, that doesn't mean that they are going to fly off the handle if you disappoint them. Anti-depressants can make you a lot of things, but they generally don't make you irrational. If she's suicidal, however, you might want to back off. It isn't a great idea to get involved with anyone who is really unstable.

Answer 6

Yes going out with her might be the best medication for her. Be nice. Be understanding. Both of you have fun. It helps to stop depressive thoughts

Answer 7

treat depression like an ailment. imagine you have acne or chicken pox or an ACL injury - you need to go through the whole process of treatment before you get better. depression isn't supposed to be a stigma. you might end up liking her in spite of her illness. :) you might even be part of the cure.

Answer 8

Sure. If her meds are working.
If you like her and she feels ready to date and you feel the same,
what are a few anti-depressants between friends?
I would wonder how it came to be a topic of conversation, though.
Is she trying to say something.
It might be good to draw her out on the subject/topic...

Answer 9

What a generous person you are to consider the effect a relationship might have on her at this time. The very fact that you're concerned about this indicates that you'll tread tenderly and carefully... so I say go for it!!!

Answer 10

Sure, why not!
You may be what it takes to get her off thae anti-depressants --now wouldn't that be a great feeling.
But, only do it if you think that you really may like her, because it could go the other way as well.
Good Luck!!!