He claims that he is bored. He is not able to work right now for Immigration reasons. He claims that I shouldn't be worried he is never going meet these people. The sites he is on, which of course predominately women message him. Is this right or wrong.
2006-12-20 16:39:13 · 43 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Send him packing, he's a liar
2006-12-20 16:42:49 · answer #1 · answered by TheWeeKiwi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is wrong, NO you should not allow him to be on any dating websites, ABSOLUTLY NOT! why would he want to do that when he's already married to you?! forget his excuses. Tell him to go out & find a hobby, do outdoor sports or have him do stuff around the house like chores, run errands for the both of you like mail out bills that need to be paid, wash the car, etc. Using the internet as ways to meet people is not the right way to go, if other women are already messaging him, that is a sign of TROUBLE headed towards your marriage. It's possible he can meet these women in person while your at work, he's capable of it. Although he may say he might not ever meet them, it's better to be safe than sorry. You better do something about this, otherwise....expect problems between you two in the near future.
2006-12-20 16:45:10 · answer #2 · answered by sugarBear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know how you can not "allow" him to go to these sites short of taking your computer with you whenever you leave the house. I think there are much more serious issues going on here than boredom and you might want to consider dragging him to a marriage counselor or kicking him out the door, whichever one feels right to you. If you choose to keep him and he can't work and is truly "bored" then there are a million other "hobbies" for him to explore. Maybe he could take up woodworking and make things that you can sell to help pay the rent, for instance.
2006-12-20 16:50:58 · answer #3 · answered by mannersplease 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say......wake up!!!!! Of course it is wrong. The key words are...Dating website! People go their to find someone to maybe create a personal relationship with. If your husband is bored...tell him to clean the house, do some laundry and wash the dishes. He can wait until the weekend for the two of you to go out and possibly meet some people together. I would keep a close eye on him...sounds like your are headed for some really bad relationship problems! Good luck!
2006-12-20 16:56:50 · answer #4 · answered by deezy89 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is wrong and you shouldnt allow it. he has a need to feel needed/accepted. this is a compromise for him. let him know how it makes "you" feel when he does this and ask him if he cares how it is making you feel. get hooked up with a good councelor that can give you both some advise on how to have a fulfilling relationship. there are right things and wrong things to do to make a relationship work. just being "in love" wont get the job done. ask him how he would feel if you were doing the same thing he is doing. get some guidance and nip this in the bud. i would recommend a book called BOUNDARIES IN MARRIAGE, by Henry Cloud and John Townsend. you can find it in a bible book store.
2006-12-20 16:50:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE is WRONG! You have to ask yourself, why is he looking on the Internet for a women to talk to? What's wrong with his wife? Why isn't he talking to you? Being bored is no excuse for this behavior! What else is he doing on the Internet? I wouldn't trust him if he's already doing this after 6 months. He's thinking with the wrong head! You are completely right and in-the-right questioning his intentions! I can assure you they are not honorable.
2006-12-20 18:25:53 · answer #6 · answered by a10cowgirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apparently I am the only one who feels this way but...
...I dont know anything about your husband. If he's honorable or not, etc. And also like others said, if he's using you or whatever etc, then that sucks.
Aside from the green card stuff, aside from the immigration stuff, I am married, and feel that my wife should not care what websites I decide to be apart of. I use to be on a singles website for the panhandle of Florida, dont want to give the website name so it doesnt look like I'm advertising, but eventually when the wife got word of it, (i didnt hide it, I was on it before I met her) she was upset, and for her I got off it.
Still not happy about it, and it wasnt a big enough deal for me to obviously force the issue, but my constant argument was that if she trust me, then it should be end of the issue right then and there.
You cant try to cage him, or restrict/limit his actions. If he really wants to cheat on you, or do anything that would hurt you, he'll do it, regardless of being apart of some website or not.
2006-12-20 16:56:25 · answer #7 · answered by friz898 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have the Internet turned off--if he isn't working and he cant pay the bill then what would he have to say about that??--If you are working and paying all the bills then its your call--He has no business on a dating website if he is married--so PULL THE PLUG --or take the keyboard with you when you go to work and then monitor him when you are home--If he is not doing anything wrong then he wont mind if you read over his shoulder RIGHT??
2006-12-20 16:46:49 · answer #8 · answered by skizzle-d-wizzle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very WRONG!!! You need to see him for the lying cheat that he is, kick his sorry *#@ to the curb, and get a good attorney. I've seen many cases like this and he'll try to convince you that he loves you and all but don't buy it. He's a user and you deserve much better. I was married to someone who wasn't from the U.S. and it was the worst experience of my entire life. I wish I had the brains to get out after only six months instead of five years. Be strong, independent, and find yourself a man who truly loves you.
2006-12-20 17:18:51 · answer #9 · answered by jamie kat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wrong. There are other ways of meeting people, other websites. Why does he choose to be on a 'DATING' one? They have websites for meeting people or talking to people, without the 'dating' bit.
2006-12-20 16:43:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. Men should not stop dating just because they get married. there is nothing wrong with him having a girlfriend on the side. He loves you and you have to do less work in bed.
the best of both worlds for everyone.
2006-12-20 16:51:37 · answer #11 · answered by Pogue_Mahone_1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋