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Aliens seeded this planet billions of years ago for food. We make an excellent hamburger I've been told. How will you prepare?

2006-12-20 15:43:19 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Science & Mathematics Astronomy & Space

14 answers

WE have no need of your bodies. Considering the poisons you put in them, we would not be able to consume them even if we were so inclined, which we aren't. As for invasion, not necessary. All we would have to do is direct a couple of medium sized asteriods at Earth and come back in a few years with clean up teams, very economical. We have been here observing you for centuries. In the last 80 years, we have maintained a presence here because your civilization is entering an interesting phase.
Average day for me consists of purging wastes for the first two hours or so. We have been altered to look like you and in order to socialize, we are required to eat your food. Although it lacks many of the nutrients we require (many of which would be poisonous to you), it also contains many substances which don't agree with us. At first we limited such consumption to avoid the purging process (you DON"T want to go in there after we're done), but there are Earth substances that make it worth it. Coffee is something that creates a feeling of such joy in us, that we must have it and paying the price of the purging process is well worth it. The rest of the day is spent documenting Human experience. We take jobs, have pets and under go down time similiar to your sleep. There are some things we have to be careful about, as Human customs are very different than ours. We know it is not polite to insult someone's mother, but you really don't want to insult ours. Our mothers are carried internally in our bodies and this gender (we have four) is rather unintelligent but quite tempermental. If you insult our mother, they demand we liquidate you (literally) and if we don't, they can cause us extreme gastro-intestinal distress that make purging Earth wastes look like a pic-nic.

2006-12-21 14:44:06 · answer #1 · answered by iknowtruthismine 7 · 0 2

Wait just a second i heard of this didn't the aliens come from Mars and didn't the have to leave because there immune system couldn't handle the common cold virus, wait that's the War of the worlds oh well if aliens come down here to harvest our bodies i say let them come, i got a double barrelled sawed off shotgun with special Teflon coated slugs, and a Russian CZ-75 9mm, 15 in the clip and one in the chamber and hollow points to go with it, not to mention enough house hold chemicals to build a dozen bombs, hell i could hold off a few aliens or a full platoon. That which does not kill me only makes me madder.

2006-12-21 05:09:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

that is a lie! hznfrs, I AM AN ALIEN, AND WE ARE ALREADY HERE, MERGED AND HIDDEN IN THE ALMOST 99% OF DNA YOU DO NOT USE! ALL HAIL THE GREAT GAZOO! (all Hail, all Hail they chant) LOL

how many think Wilma was Hot on the Flintstones!

Shakalaka? you mean Shamalama Ding Dong, moow moow


anyways you're thinking of Doctors, they're the ones that "Harvest" your Organs, like you're a fertile crop! LOL

2006-12-21 00:49:05 · answer #3 · answered by Courageous Capt. Cat 3 · 0 0

I get a short haircut and a shave, these aliens hate hairs in their soup

2006-12-21 03:13:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I am preparing by digging a very deep hole to hide in.

Inside this hole I plan to store cases of MRE's and jugs of clean, fresh water, and a few guns with lots of ammunition.

2006-12-21 12:32:47 · answer #5 · answered by zahbudar 6 · 1 0

Poison myself so If any aliens eat me they will get sick, but not so bad that I die. Or get really really skinny so I'll have hardly any meat so they won't be interested in me.

2006-12-21 09:45:56 · answer #6 · answered by Total Insanity! 2 · 0 0

I got my SuperSoaker 2000 ready to go. Bring it on alien scum!

2006-12-21 03:23:52 · answer #7 · answered by Roman Soldier 5 · 0 0

I am pre-loading my body with alien poison. They cannot survive alcohol.

2006-12-20 23:50:53 · answer #8 · answered by iansand 7 · 0 0

I am rapidly wearing my body out so no one would want to occupy it... not even me soon.

2006-12-20 23:54:41 · answer #9 · answered by arnp4u 3 · 1 0

Well marinated and ready to grill. R U ok ???

2006-12-20 23:51:28 · answer #10 · answered by sundeep s 2 · 0 0

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