do you think i should divorce him?

Question

i am feeling tired of being married to my husband sometimes i think about a divorce acturally ever day. he helps me with my life by helping me study and things like that but as for relationship he isnt funny or fun he isnt sexy anymore. he doesnt work out anymore or take care of him self or his teeth or his hair. i asked him today if he would go out with me to tgi fridays for a lousy mud slide and he said no. so we went home and i said i am leaving to go to tgi fridays to get a mud slide. he got jealouse then he said he would go. i said no. you dont want to have fun anymore. it to thepointwhere i dont want to kiss him or anything and he wants sex but he doesnt want to do things to lite my fire. but then if we have freinds over he will have some drinks and have fun. but just us its on the couch he goes or maybe a walk or something. i ask him to have sex in different positions he wont do it he wont try new things but he wants me to give it up.

Answer 1

Blah, blah, blah.

I'd be afraid to be alone in the world with your (lack of) common sense.

Answer 2

Let's try a little sarcasm here...SURE, DIVORCE HIM, HE'S A BUM. THAT WHOLE "TIL DEATH DO WE PART" THING THAT YOU SAID IN FRONT OF GOD, FRIENDS AND FAMILY WAS ONLY A SUGGESTION, NOT A COMMITMENT! Then you can find a new guy that will have "FUN" with you. And when someone needs to wash the dishes or take care of the kids or pay the bills, maybe your new husband will say, "You do it! I wanna have fun!" And then you can divorce him, cause you need someone who will help you wash the dishes and take care of the kids or pay the bills. Is any of this sinking in?

Here's a real idea...tell him that you think you want a divorce. (1) it will tell you whether you, yourself, really want a divorce or just like to post questions on the internet. Because saying the word divorce to your spouse AIN'T EASY! (2) He might say, ME TOO! And then you'll both know that there is a better place for both of you too be! (3) The word "Divorce" might shock him enough that he pulls his head out of his *** long enough to see what he is doing to his wife and his marriage.

Marriage is WORK! So, GOOD LUCK, cause you'll need it!

Answer 3

Sounds like you 2 need a good talk...dont take the easy way out and divorce, work it out, thats what marriage is about, think of WHY you married him in the first place, there must have been a reason. Try seeking professional help for the 2 of you..just dont give up yet girl, hang in there and get to the root of this problem before it get's worse..if he doesn't want too talk or do anything about it than he is obvisouly bored or has a bigger problem, than maybe consider divorce..after you have tried EVERYTHING. Good Luck

Answer 4

It's called a rut, the blahs, the routine, whatever. I don't know what's more shocking, that you are actually thinking divorce or that so many people are saying leave this guy.

Instead of dealing with circumstances, try telling him how you feel. Be honest. And don't tell him that you feel "like" something; tell him your actual feelings. Then maybe he will hear how bored and pained you are and wake up.

Maybe something's going on with him and he's totally stressed...or worse yet, he senses your dissatisfaction, and not knowing what to do, is just standing pat to see what you're going to do. I know that's not a great thing to think, but it could be true.

You're going to have to actually communicate with him, I've never met a mind reader yet, much less a male who can read a female's mind (I'd pay a million$ to have that trick!). Instead of telling him what you want to do, tell him how this current situation makes you feel. It can do wonders.

Answer 5

Marriage isn't about the same man you married, it is about the partnership that the two of you have now. I know that if you look really hard beneath the things that you say are bothering you about him, that the man you love is still there. Have you changed since you got married. Divorce is a serious thing and if you can truly say that marriage is nothing but fun and games and mudslides then I say divorce him and stop living a lie, but if you really understand the meaning of marriage then stay married but let him know that things have to change with his Hygiene habits and his appearance. Remember the day you got married he was all nice and neat and he needs to be reminded that you didn't marry a slob. And if he chooses to be the slob then he is answering your question for you. Been married and divorced and believe me with lots of hard work marriage is worth it but it takes to to make it happen.

Answer 6

Ah...the work of a woman is never done. Men unravel easily in marriage, especially when married to a really good woman. You know he is in there somewhere because he does help you. Now you have to train him in the rest like personal hygeine. It would embarass you to know how many women still have not taught their husbands about toilet hinges.
You might want to consider having a communications facilitator - pastor or counselor. I'm a pastor and counselor and have used a counselor off and on throughout my married life.
Sex is about giving pleasure, not taking it just for yourself. Teach him with the carrot/stick approach.

Answer 7

Well i think he love u, but hes not in love with u any more! and so he has just let him self go, we as women seeing our men looking bad, it's a turn off to us. on the other hand A man doesn't realize that a woman really does want sex, but sometimes before she can feel her desires, she first needs his emotional support! talk to him tell him how u feel, communication is the best thing in the world before u think about a divorce, when a woman repeatedly gets the message and truly believes that her husband loves sex with her but are not keeping himself clean, her sexual desires can remain unhealthy and not as strong. so if hes not willing to go out with u try going out with family and friends and leave his butt at home! ur only have one life to live so it should be a happy one!!! good Luck and i wish u the best!!!!!!

Answer 8

You sound like you both have issues, perhaps some counselling would do the trick.

Other than that all I can say is you need to talk about your feelings and listen to his and try to remember that any relationship will loose a certain amount of zest after time! That's when the love really kicks in.

Answer 9

I have been having some similar problems in my marriage, but I still love him so we are working things out. There must have been some good things in the beginning, things about him that you loved. Maybe you 2 just need some help getting back there again. It's worth at least a try isn't it.

Answer 10

People get married and think that it will be a breeze, you will feel the same way about each other and you won't have to try. I think it's a real shame that people see divorce as such as easy option. You made a commitment to each other and you both need to try everything to make it work before you even think about divorce - if you had children and they turned out to be less than you wanted would you get rid of them!

Answer 11

you need to get reallllly serious, sit down and have a talk. Does he know you want a divorce? If he doesn't you should tell him. Try not to yell or start world war three, just talk, that's the best way to get a man to confess. Just straight up ask him why he doesn't love you as much anymore. If he says he still loves you, ask him why he never wants to have fun. REMEMBER ONLY TALK, NO SCREAMING OR GOING PSYCHO