I'm afraid of marriage, which is fine for now and I know why, and it's nothing to do with my parents. But I'd like to know what would the term for that be? matromonyphobia?
And no, I'm not a commitophobe. When I want something, I commit and I GET it, no matter what it takes, so anyone that answers with that term... eh, not a lot I can do but I'll get annoyed.
The fear stems from a hellatious relationship that was controlling to the point of I was all but ordered to marry him. Never did, thank god, but it's scarey when you have to go on depo behind your 26yr old bf's back so that he can't get you pregnant, which would be the only way we could have legally goten married without waiting two more years, and he knew I was doubting his methods of brainwashing me as it was and wanted me with a ball and chain ASAP. I know it's a valid fear, but what's it called?
Should I be in therepy for this?
2006-12-20 12:37:22 · 16 answers · asked by mandy 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Definition of Fear of marriage
Fear of marriage: An abnormal and persistent fear of being married. Sufferers of this phobia experience undue anxiety even though they may rationally realize that the married state itself poses no threat to them. They may fear the challenge of living with another person and the responsibility of rearing a family. Or they may worry about failing as a sexual partner.
Fear of being married is termed "gametophobia," a word derive from the Greek "gamete" (wife) and "gamein" (to marry).
In English the term "gamete" technically refers to either of two types of cells that unite in reproduction to begin formation of an embryo. In males, these cells are referred to as sperm. In females, they are referred to as eggs.
Guido
2006-12-20 12:41:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you really are not afraid of commitment or marriage period.
from you're own words you stated you went though "a hellatious
relationship that was controlling". a productive relationship is neither that, whether it is with a friend or a potental life partner.
you need to make sure that you won't fall into the same trap again
of being controlled by a jerk, it starts off slowly (especially if he makes a lot less money than you do if at all, or one that is very wealthy, and thinks of you as dirt on his feet), they start making demands that are not normal in a budding relationship, too demanding, telling you to pay for his stuff(if he is poor), buying expensive gifts (if he's rich). i could go on but the rich guy wants to buy you and make you obligated for what he has bought you so his demands, in his mind they are justified(note, i said in his mind),
and the poor guy wants you to treat him like a puppy dog that you just can't let go to send to the animal shelther and like a puppy will make demands that at some point are hard to keep because you really did not want a puppy.
a real relationship relies on trust (the first, and foremost), common interest or the willingnist to find out new things (he likes hiking, you like walking on the beach), do you both share the same values; politics, religon, etc.?. you must use common sense and you're own intuition and your'e new found sense on how to give an honest look at a man and for that matter any other person in your'e life. you are your'e own person, he is his own person, never should you or he compromise each others
principles just for the sake of making a relationship work.
all in all, you are you, you are special,and you cannot be controlled anymore, by anyone, be strong, the love of you're life
is out here, somewhere, and it could be a person you work beside with everyday. merry christmas and a happy new year and beyond.
2006-12-20 14:07:46 · answer #2 · answered by barrbou214 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maximum adult adult males do no longer worry marriage.....as long as though thats we'd like and if we are waiting for it. the real undertaking is that adult adult males now and back get forced into marriage somewhat its from their companions, family members, or friends. The rigidity that females face approximately settling down early and having a family members by some potential initiatives onto adult adult males as though we ought to do the comparable. and despite if a guy is in a good relationship, it quite is ruined if he's not waiting to "take the subsequent step" and his better half finally leaves him. Divorce, in approaches, additionally has to do with it in spite of the shown fact that it is going back to adult adult males wanting to get married as against feeling obligated or forced to get married. No guy needs to circulate right into a marriage he's not waiting for and then it is going downhill which ends up in divorce and all the subjects that stick to it.
2016-10-15 08:28:28 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fear of marriage: An abnormal and persistent fear of being married. Sufferers of this phobia experience undue anxiety even though they may rationally realize that the married state itself poses no threat to them. They may fear the challenge of living with another person and the responsibility of rearing a family. Or they may worry about failing as a sexual partner.
Fear of being married is termed "gametophobia," a word derive from the Greek "gamete" (wife) and "gamein" (to marry).
In English the term "gamete" technically refers to either of two types of cells that unite in reproduction to begin formation of an embryo. In males, these cells are referred to as sperm. In females, they are referred to as eggs.
2006-12-20 15:58:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's called Common Sense. You know that the chances of knowing enough about someone to spend your life with them are pretty small, and you need to have enough common purpose with someone to overcome your logical reasons to avoid getting entangled with them.
Think of marriage as a business, and you are putting up half the cash. That's what it is. Religions want everyone to get married to make more children under one roof so that they can be 'educated' about the 'proper' way to live. The government wants you to take care of their future soldiers.
What is your goal for a marriage? Love is just a lizard brain reaction that gets you interested in someone. Marriage is the deal you make with them for future common purpose.
2006-12-20 13:19:58 · answer #5 · answered by auntiegrav 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In this instance, with your controlling, crazy boyfriend, your "fear" of marriage is called COMMON SENSE.
Thank heaven you got away from this guy!
Not all men are like this. Give yourself some healing, quiet time, but don't give up on finding a deep loving relationship. They DO exist!
Good luck!
2006-12-20 13:02:37 · answer #6 · answered by pat z 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a fear of being controlled and abused - based on your horrible relationship. You have been scarred emotionally.
Yes, I think you are quite right that a good therapist would help with this.
Good for you for being so clear about what happened in that abusive relationship.
Well done.
2006-12-20 16:31:15 · answer #7 · answered by concernedjean 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Committment Phobia.
2006-12-20 13:29:15 · answer #8 · answered by Bubble T 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cold feet
2006-12-20 12:42:47 · answer #9 · answered by Rachel T. 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hope this helps.
Gamophobia - "Fear of Marriage." From the Greek "gamos" = "marriage" and the suffix "-phobia."
2006-12-20 19:33:06 · answer #10 · answered by Jungleroy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋