Don't hang me yet I will NEVER act on this so just hear me out...I have developed a friendship with this woman over the last few years and realized that the feelings have gotten deeper. Her husband treats her horribly and I guess I have been someone that's there for her. I honestly don't know if any of these feelings are shared and I know she wouldn't act on them either. Maybe it's the want what you can't have I don't know. I was just wondering if anyone has any ideas on how to get over it and move on.
2006-12-20 11:20:14 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
~Tell her husband how you feel about his wife. You should be able to get over it very quickly...once you're out of traction.
2006-12-20 11:44:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont' think you like this woman you have a s a friend. IF you did- you would have made a move a long time ago since you've known her for years. To me it seems like you care avout her alot and feel a great sympaathy for what she's going through and think that if she were your wife she shuolnd't have to worry about being treated the way she does because you're a good guy. BUt- if you think and feel that the feeling are getting deeper- stay away from her and just talk to her but don't engage in going to lunch together or talking on the phone for long periods of time. By doing this you will feed the feelings you have by giving her the chance of getting to know you and because she's going through a rough time- she may find in you what she's been looking for in her husband and hell will break loose. Look at it as if she's your best friend and try to be there for her and that's it. IF you go on with it you can start doing things that you might regret later. Good luck to you!
2006-12-20 11:27:04 · answer #2 · answered by Cheesy Stuff 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not make the mistake to get involved with her, there must be a good reason she is still with him, you have no idea how much harm you can do to this marriage, if you both get involved and get caught by her husband, believe me, you and that woman will live the hell, if you really care about her, let her know how you feel and immediately get away from her, if she shares those same feelings she will probably get divorced and will go to you, but DO NOT MAKE THE MISTAKE of getting involved before, no matter how bad the husband is NO ONE DESERVES TO BE CHEATED ON, be honest with yourselves, if you just want to get over it, same advise put some distance between this lady and yourself.
2006-12-20 12:48:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, if you know you will never act on it, and you don't know if she feels the same about you, there isn't really anywhere to go on this other than leaving well alone. You are friends with her, which is all very nice, but if it starts to mess with your head because you want her and can't have her, this might not be such a healthy friendship any more.
My advice would be to see a bit less of her, and try to find someone who is available, and doesn't have all these issues. If her marriage ends of its own accord, then by all means start seeing her again, but unless that happens I would leave well alone.
2006-12-20 11:29:51 · answer #4 · answered by helly 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you married? She may feel the same way about you and you will never know if you dont atleast hint to her about it. leave it open though so you can get out of it if she is non responsive. like why don't we go out for a cup of coffee one evening or something like that and just see how she reacts. I definitely think it is possible for two married people to meet someone and realize that maybe they have made a mistake and they just don't want to hurt a wife or husband. Is it really worth it though to go through life not knowing just so you can say I did the right thing? Good Luck and I don't think you should give up on it!
2006-12-20 11:32:13 · answer #5 · answered by kd 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'd go after the woman you love, even if she is married. Most would tell you this is bad advice but you can't help how you feel. I guess my opinion is this because I am married but I'm in love with a another man that I have known since I was a teen. He loves me too but we are not together. It is a distance issue which allows me to remain with my morals but I wish more than anything that he would come here, proclaim his love for me and be there with me through the pain and hardship of leaving my husband for him. Everyone is so wrapped up in what society thinks is right, that everyone has forgotten that true love exists. If you believe you love her then go grab your chance. She might feel the same and years to come you both might be glad you did.
2006-12-20 11:29:07 · answer #6 · answered by applecheeks 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You have developed feelings for this woman because you two spend time together and she shares with you and this has been going on for years and it's not hard to fall. But you know you can't act on it so that increases the feelings. Yeah, you want what you can't have.
2006-12-20 11:25:48 · answer #7 · answered by kitcat 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You go to a male friend who does not know the woman, and ask to counsel and pray with him over this for guidance.
You can not and should not "rescue" this woman friend from her situation. This is something SHE has to handle, and not with any of your assistance. She needs to get counseling or get out, but it has to be entirely HER decision, not suggestions from you.
You will get over it, but it will take busying yourself, prayer, talking in confidence with male friends, and setting yourself on either dating other women or just focusing on non-dating matters.
This is not going to be easy, but the longer you delay, the harder it will become, then one or both of you will step over the line, and that is when the REAL pain begins.
122006 6:30
2006-12-20 11:33:58 · answer #8 · answered by YRofTexas 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just remember that there are 2 sides to every story. Does she tell you that he treats her bad or have you seen it? DO not get involved with this woman till she is divorced. You can have feelings for someone, just make sure you keep them to yourself till the time is right.
2006-12-20 11:25:10 · answer #9 · answered by mydds07 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well let me ask you first,are you sure that you are in love and not in lust?!?! if you are sure that you are indeed in love then if you think that she will be happier with you and feels the same way, then go and fight for it! but if not, why bother risking your friendship with her? you should also consider the consequences if they have children. what if inspite of her unhappiness with her husband, he remains to be a good provider for her and her children. this will affect them as well so please tread carefully. i wish you the best of luck.
2006-12-20 16:19:53 · answer #10 · answered by Acidburn 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋