my partner of 6 years left me 2 months ago for someone else thats not the problem ythough the prob is that he dont want nothing to do with his kids only on his bday and eid as he is muslim i told him he cant just c them when it suits him he has to consider the childrens feelings they r 1 n 4 his new girlfriend has 2 children and he is with them all the time but now he is threatening to take me to court because i wont let him have them this eid coming i dont want him to see them if he is treating them like something he can pick up and put down when he feels like it my eldest went to nursery and said she wanted to change her name as she has his last name i didnt know this until the teacher took me to the side and told after nursery finished! he has even told his frieds and family that its me who wont let him see the kids he dont even phone to see how they r but he will ask his friends how they r so that it seems he is interested what can i do? can anyone give me any advice
2006-12-20 07:49:37 · 6 answers · asked by lindsey c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i am already getting child maintenance andbecause he has said he is going to solicitor i have been to mine but as i dont know his solicitors details or his new girlfriends address i have no details of him to give my solicitor which is what she needs
2006-12-20 08:02:53 · update #1
it is not my ex who wants to change my daughters name it is my daughter who ios only 4 and she doesnt want her dads name anymore for some reason
2006-12-20 08:04:43 · update #2
Children are very perceptive! They see things from a very young age, and although she is only 4 ... has obviously digested the fact that her father doesn't see her!
I would suggest you speak with your lawyer about changing both their names to your maiden name, which is perfectly legal! Just tell him you are using your maiden name again and that you want your kids to feels as though you are a unit!! As for him not seeing them on a regular basis, get your lawyer to draw up a legal visitations contract, with the added stipulation, if he fails to make regular contact with his children, he waivers his rights! Inother words he has to stick to the agreement, otherwise he doesn't get to see them. I am sure if you explain this to your lawyer, he will be in total agreement with you! It seems to be your ex has just replaced his kids with someone elses!! I do feel for you as they are still so young! Do get their names changed though as in the long run it will be of benefit to you! He is obviously still their father, but if your little girl wants to change it, then you have to show her that you respect what she wants! Good luck and take some comfort in knowing things always work out ... kids do grow up and soon make their own choices ... even the courts will listen to their little voices!! Take care.
2006-12-20 09:22:54 · answer #1 · answered by lynne 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems he wants his cake and eat it! my sister is in the same position when the novelty wears off with the new family he l probably take more of an interest, you could see a solicitor and try and get some sort of acsess rights, point out that he must stick to these arrangements or you will have no choice but to seek further legal help,its annoying but the children do need to see their father even if its not as often as it should be, then in years to come they will know that you tried your best for them,and they have nothing to blame you for he cannot change names without your consent make the nursey aware of your situation and that anything to do with the children should go through you first and no one else as you have custody of your children they will respect your wishes
2006-12-20 16:01:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have a court order for visitation you must follow the order or you will go to jail. If you have physical custody of them then go to friend of court inform them of your concerns. You can not just stop the father from seeing his kids. But you can file for an evaluation of the situation. The courts can determine if visitations should continue, or be supervised. In my experience,usually dads like him faid away. As far as the child changing the last name, that sometimes is out of anger, but if insisting depending on the state you can do so for about $200.00. Or try to convince the judge threw friend of the court without having to pay that.
2006-12-20 16:11:03 · answer #3 · answered by c_schreel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a solicitor involved you can get legal aid and beat him to it dont forget to mention (if he is not doing so) you need financial help from him for his children.
2006-12-20 15:54:35 · answer #4 · answered by Ding Dong 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be careful. He seems to believe he can just do whatever he wants. Protect yourself and your children.
2006-12-20 16:29:08 · answer #5 · answered by colorado_mechanic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
English please.
2006-12-20 16:01:03 · answer #6 · answered by crymsyneyes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋