my best friend's brother just died( she and her family are close friends to ours) and I am worried about it. I am deeply sad myself, and I cry every time I visit her, or remember him. but lately I have been able to numb my feelings for I have exams. I have been thinking of paying her more visits to cheer her up(of course you can imagine her state and her loss). Is it appropriate to hide my sadness in front of her and try to cheer her up? If so, what do I do?
By the way, I have been thinking of some ideas like buying her books, or sweets, a mug perhaps, you know stuff like that spontaneously, presents and so, everytime I visit. she is 21 by the way.
2006-12-20 05:49:33 · 7 answers · asked by mariamofcairo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
One if my good friends brother died exactly 3 years ago today. I felt so bad. I had just moved to a differnt country so i wasn't there to help her. I did however send her lots of emails and call her all the time. I told her funny things, i know if i had still been in england, i would have asked her to do things she loves and try to keep her mind off of it.
So try taking her someone where she loves or like you said buy her things that she loves.
She will be okay in a while, it will just take sometime
2006-12-20 05:54:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time is the only thing that will heal her pain, however, it will help tremendously if you continue to show support. Support her in a way that helps HER, whatever SHE needs at this time. Whether that is cheering up or talking endlessly about her loss. I don't know what you mean by "hiding your sadness in front of her." I would try to follow her mood and your heart. If cheering up seems to have an effect, great, if not, do something else.
2006-12-20 05:59:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a very hard time for her right now. She is very lucky to have a friend like you who cares about her. Time will help heal these wounds. You can help by just being there for her to cry on and listen to her feelings. Try to get her mind on something else but also realize that she needs this time to grieve her loss. The grieving process is very important in order for her to heal this pain without stuffing it which can cause alot of problems later in life. You are doing the right things for her. She needs you right now and you are there for her. I admire that in you.
2006-12-20 05:57:52 · answer #3 · answered by Miss Crickett 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
Best thing to do is what your heart says.
I was in a situation like this and my friend who lost his mother took the whole term off school. When he came back he looked drained.
So I stated the conversation on something he likes best which was cricket! I'm not that much into cricket but yeah it would help your friend alot.
Don't forget to sometimes take them out for a walk or something to get their mind off the fact that they loast a loved one.
2006-12-20 05:55:17 · answer #4 · answered by amir_in_london 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you should hide that your sad too because it makes people feel better when someone can feel their pain and they understand the hurt. Just keep doing things for her, be there for her and get her out the house!
2006-12-20 07:28:19 · answer #5 · answered by sweetness 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try to be there for her as much as possible. its ok to hide your feeling in front of her but if the urge to cry comes while your with her go ahead and cry cause you dont want her thinking you dont care its better to mourn together be there for each other
2006-12-20 06:27:54 · answer #6 · answered by lovingmychris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why don't you just hang out with her? Get her out of the house away from everything that is happening at her house. Get ger to thank about something else.
2006-12-20 05:54:56 · answer #7 · answered by BlueDaisy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋