My story isnt uncommon, bad divorce. He left me in a bad spot. I work on commission & I'm new- start up is hard. My kids are having no Christmas, no lie! I cant pay my bills, I dont know what to do. I know what you think & no, that's not me. I have a college ed., come from a good home, love the Lord & appear to be doing ok. But I can't keep up the facade any longer. I feel like I'm going to disappear & nobody will notice; but where will that leave my kids??
2006-12-20 04:57:20 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't loose faith! I know you are at the point where the only light at the end of the tunnel you see is a big ol freight train coming your way. It will get better, just keep trying.
Have you talked to local churches about your money problem? some of them will write you a check to help you out, or at least give you food so you do not have to spend money on that. You can also talk to your local state agency about temporary state help, if at least, once again getting food stamps in your kids' name so it takes away that pressure of the bills.
Other than that if you are not going to church regularly you should start, find a big one, because that will help with you selling your items, whatever it is.
2006-12-20 05:02:20 · answer #1 · answered by allaboutme_333 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a mom of 5 and I can completely understand how you feel & what is going on. Go to every source salvation Army. public assistance, all of them United Way Churches/ anybody then try to find a cheaper place to live explain it to your children if they are over 5 or 6 so they can understand that it is nothing they have done it is just how things have turned out. now sit down somewhere (bathroom)) Calm yourself and completely open yourself and as the Angels that are always around to help you in any and all ways they see fit -- Then thank them and take a deep breath and keep going. You have to- you have kids.Pride has to be put away and you go to those churches and you be completely honest and someone will help you. Love your kids and Christmas will be fine. It is not about how many gifts they get it is that you are still there. Good Luck and Best Blessings.
2006-12-20 05:10:18 · answer #2 · answered by srmc7 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the time when you ask close friends and relatives to please help you cause you are drowning. As long as you are not on drugs or an alcoholic, I think they would help you. Most people will try to help if they can temporarily. In the mean time, look for a job that pays you a weekly salary. If your a college graduate you should be able to find a steady job with a weekly salary. Call a financial guidance place and let them take over paying your bills and talking to your creditors. Sit your children down and explain to them the situation. If any of them are old enough to work, ask them if they could get a part time job to help out a little. Ask your ex-husband if he could tack on a few extra dollars into his child support and then when you get back on your feet and are doing good he can deduct that amount to pay him back. Like I said most people don't mind helping for a little while. Just remember those who do help and do something wonderful for them when you are doing well yourself. This is the time when you find out who your really good friends are. God bless you.
2006-12-20 05:13:01 · answer #3 · answered by sunny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetheart, since you say u come from a good home, do u have any family who can take u in for christmas? if not all of you, at least your kids for a while?
it's always hard starting over, but u sound like the type you can tough it out. i know that this may not help, but i feel sad for you. i was almost the same way last christmas.
my bf did not get pay so i spent 750.00 on his daughter, paid his car loan, my school loan and hire purchase bill. had no money left for us for christmas so he spent it with his family. i ate the same food (rice, lentil and stewed chicken) for christmas eve, christmas and the next day!! he did not come home until after.
try to see if you can get at least a small something for your kids- i thank god i had no kids for christmas last year. you can email me at sali0709@yahoo.com.
may not be able to help but talking to someone might lighten the load
2006-12-20 05:16:56 · answer #4 · answered by stacy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call the United Way. They have programs to help families in need. They can direct you to churches and other organizations who can help with gifts for Christmas for your children. Thank God you are out of a bad marriage. Go through an employment agency to help you find a job with a steady income. You are from a good family. Lean on them for emotional support. This is what families do . They stick together in the good times and the bad. Last, you must be strong for your children. You are all they have. Good luck... I hope you will find peace and joy again.
2006-12-20 05:07:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the same situation, although I only have one child. My son won't be getting presents from me for christmas because I can't afford anything. I have been at thrift stores and I've found new items and will be giving the gifts to the people I found gifts for. I completely understand how you feel. I just hope for the best and i've explained to my son that Christmas doesn't mean you get gifts but a time for faith and being with your family. We have to be grateful for that. Maybe you and your kids could all make dinner together, bake, watch movies, and play games together. I'm sure they will appreciate the quality time.
2006-12-20 05:04:35 · answer #6 · answered by Jo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
am really sorry for you, but remember the you are not the only one the is going Truth that, few years ago i was in kind of the same situation, been newly married and with a new carrier getting pay on commission only basis. but for harder the life seems you have to keep you faith cause remember the god wound give you more than you can handle,i really sorry the you feel depressed right now but you have to be strong for you babies, and if you can afford Christmas at lease be with them and let them know the you love them. i wish i can help you,and if you don't mind get some used toys let me know, i have tons of them.be strong and don't loose your faith, GOD BLESS YOU and good luck.
2006-12-20 05:18:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to the salvation army...they help people who are under employed with children...they will help with utilities and rent and sometimes other things...definitely with food. Also connect up with a church and ask for help from them...you can sometimes network into a better paying position and they will often help with bills...the state aid offices go without question, but they are often pretty chintzy. Hang in there, I've been there. Salvation Army was the one that always helped me the most when going to school on VA. God bless you.
2006-12-20 05:05:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't disappear because that is a permant soloution to a temporary problem. Go to your chuch and talk to the paster or priest. There are options!
It is always darkest before the dawn. If you love the Lord, then don't give up on him.
2006-12-20 05:02:30 · answer #9 · answered by darrellkern 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Think of your kids. I can somewhat relate to everything but the divorce. You have to be strong and do whats best for your kids. They didnt ask to be here involved in the results of bad decisions. Dont get so down about yourself. We all have flaws and have fell short. Stop pretending you dont have anything to prove to anyone. If you love the lord like you say, then do what he says to do with your problems....Leave them for him to deal with. I know its easier said than done , but you have to.
2006-12-20 05:02:21 · answer #10 · answered by daprty1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋