Just how hard is the first year of marriage?

Question

Just how hard is the first year of marriage? What things have you gone through in the first year of your marriage?

Answer 1

Ours was tough. We unexpectedly got pregnant 3 months after we got married. That caused a lot of tension, made for an interesting year. We had been together for 4 years before we got married and had been through a lot of ups and downs and thought we are on to smooth sailing once we got married. We made it through just fine and have a beautiful son who has added so much joy and love to our life and brought our family together in ways we could never imagine.
For better or for worse...............

Answer 2

The first year is hard. Actually, the first few years are hard b/c you are both trying to be nice to each other b/c you are "newly weds", try being romantic but it's tough b/c you fall under the pressure of friends or families microscopes while trying to maintain your own individual identity. Don't worry about what other people think or tell you what they did when they first got married b/c if you do that will drive you crazy comparing what he did or didn't do etc.

It is best to be honest with each other, talk about things that bother you when they bother you or shortly thereafter don't let it build up to the point of an explosion, don't be so strict nor rigid about the new rules, people make mistakes, try to be open minded about each others needs or wants. I know this is a cliche but you should try not to go to bed angry and especially don't let him or make him sleep on the couch after a fight. That creates more tension in the morning.

Just remember that no one is perfect. Dating was fun but now this is marriage so if you haven't lived together in the past then this is the time you will see what he's really like and no matter what annoying habits he may have just remember why you married him in the first place. Then communicate to him what both of you can do to not annoy each other so much but instead find ways to be closer with one another. Communication is very important along with patience, understanding, support and love.

Answer 3

The first year is the hardest. This is when you really get to know one another and at times question your choice of partners. The second year is a little less hard and continues up to about the seventh year. Most divorces happen around the seventh year. Some countries now only have seven year marriages. At the end of seven years a couple is no longer married. At that time they can remarry for another 7 years, or just live together or walk a way. Personally, I think governments of all levels should stay out of marriages all together and not issue "government" marriage licenses. If a couple wants to marry let the Church issue licenses or let the couple live together with all the privileges of taxable dependents, medical care, etc for as long as they wish to be together and be allowed to do so with as many partners as is desired and can support.

Answer 4

the first year is getting use to each other and thats when all the the things come out that you never noticed before. You know, while your dating you are on your best behavior-after your married it kind of goes out the window. It's usually not anything just ungodly bad just the little things and its easy to adjust to. Think of it as a breaking in period. My first year the first time was not all that hard. The marriage I am in now was more difficult. The first year was just about the last one.
Back to your question it really depends on how well you know your spouse and if there are any secrets lurking about.

Answer 5

First year of marriage?

Well there is a bit of bliss as well as alot of adjustments.

I would tell you that it is not a question of the marriage being hard per se but all the adjustments you will have to make.

Imagine fighting over the simple things like "Toilet Seat Up" Vs "Toilet Seat Down" this is jus the most basic thing.

You will have to get used to each others habits and quirks some of which you probably were not aware of before moving in with each other.

I would venture that the biggest things is to keep others out of your personal business and that means in-laws especially.

Good luck and god bless.

Married 17 years and counting, learn to compromise and you will have success.

Answer 6

The first year of marriage is what continues throughout your life. There might be a few hiccups here and there, but try to sit together and solve it. Never let it grow in your hearts. Solve your issues then and there. a hug and a sorry would solve any kind of issue. I am married. Believe me, the more intimate you both are, that is what continues thereafter. We have been married for 3 years and our love has grown several folds since we were married. This was because, we made a point that our first year of marriage went smooth.

Answer 7

first of all anyone that say marriage is a waste of time they just cant afford it lmao..its alway hard in the first 2 years of marriage even if you two are totally in love with each other..things always get heated up..some people here will tell you to try counseling but never do that unless its the last resort..ive been thru the worst, either its money, another girl, and even my job cuz it took alot of my time and the only thing i could tell you after 4 years of marriage is that do what makes you happy before its to late. only you can make that choice if you wanna be happy or be trapped for a long time, and when you guys have kids, then your ******. idk if that help but good luck in your marriage and in life..
never let anything pass you by, cause you'll never know when it might come your way again...

Answer 8

Having been married for over 10 years, I think the first is the easiest. I think the hardest years are after the "newness" and excitement has worn off that are much more difficult. Also, when you have a screaming baby at 3:00 in the morning and you both have been sexless for over 2 months and working on week #2 without sleep, these are the tough times!

Answer 9

The first year is the hardest because you are both getting to know each other on a everyday basis living in the same house. Little habits you have or he has may be somewhat annoying the first year for example...throwing cloths on the floor instead of the hamper, leaving tooth past in the sink and not washing it out, leaving the toilet seat up and your butt falls in the toilet in the middle of the night and so on. The second year you are used to all these little things and have voiced your opinion on the issues that really bother you. As time goes on you will hopefully with any luck have him trained....

Answer 10

The first year of marriage is very hard! You will have many disagreements. You both will need to be very mature and be able to sit down and talk about your disagreements and hopefully be able to come to some kind of agreement. My advice to you is if you have not gotten married yet that you both make a list of all the things that you want in marriage. You also need to make a list of the things you both do not want in the marriage. You then need to sit down and talk about all these things. Do not leave anything out of your discussion! If you both agree to everything after your discussion and you still feel that you want to get married then I wish you both the best of luck and A very Happy Future together.

Answer 11

Just coming up on our first anniversary. It's been a time of adjustment for both of us but for the most part it has been rather easy. Things we've had to get used to are . . .

He needs 5 hours sleep, I need 10
He snores
We handle our money a bit differently
My kids live with us, and they can be a bit, shall we say, challenging
We like different foods

But we talk things out and we try to treat each other with respect even when we disagree . . . so it's been fine. In fact if our entire marriage is like this, it would be one of the best marriages I know of.