I went to a clothing optional beach with three friends. All whom I am wondering are my ex friends now. The three friends were white and I am Black. I am not shy by nature so when we got to the beach (Haulover Beach, Miami, FL) I stripped naked. The three girls (we are all 18 and freshman in college) decided to keep their bikinis on. I mean the first few minutes were akward being nude in front of them but then it seemed ok and then started talking and we eventually walked the shore, I was still nude and these three ex friends in their bikinis. One of the girls Kristin said " I look like a little monkey ape walking around naked " and later in the day my friend Courtney said " Your a dirty BOY going nude today ".
These girls havent ever ever remotely said anything racial to me EVER. Was this just me being made fun of cause I was totally nude and they were not? Or was there more to it? Am I over thinking this?
2006-12-20 02:55:03 · 26 answers · asked by Kam187 1 in Social Science ➔ Sociology
Sorry Buddy, sounds like racism to me.
I think they just wanted to see you nude. They never had plans of removing their clothes.
2006-12-22 12:56:58 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to decide deep down if you REALLY feel they would have said those words to you to offend you. This world is filling up fast with things we cannot do and words we cannot say which makes it difficult to be politically correct when you just want to relax and have fun. If it was a stranger I would definately take offense that they would feel the could speak with me in that way not knowing if I would be offended or not.
Maybe these girls feel comfortable enough that they could say these things to you and feel you know them well enough to know they wouldn't try to hurt you on purpose.
I'm sure they are SOMEWHAT open to the idea of naked people since they went to THAT beach! Otherwise I would question why would they be there and make fun of you?
The bottom line is, you have a choice to be offended or not. You have a choice to ask them and know for sure. If you are already thinking they are ex friends, what do you have to lose? Find out what they meant and give them the benefit of the doubt. If they act weird or evasive about it then back off and see what happens or decide not to be friends with them.
It sounds that the 4 of you just experienced something new that day so its quite possible that everybody was just feeling insecure about different things but nobody was out to hurt one another.
2006-12-20 20:01:35 · answer #2 · answered by Suzanne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did something that they were uncomfortable doing themselves. A lot of times when we can't find it in ourselves to do something we make fun of those that do. You stood out as the only one able to accept the optional. Which left you open for ridicule by someone who doesn't have a good understanding of themselves or you. Most likely they didn't know what they were doing.
Just answer one question. What if the sign said Racism optional? Racism is a choice just like keeping the bikini on or taking it off. By having you as a friend they get the chance, maybe, to get to understand you and any possible differences you have, but only if you keep an open mind as well.
Best of luck,
Joe
2006-12-20 05:17:06 · answer #3 · answered by Joe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think it was racial. They were probably just a little jealous that you are okay with doing something out of the norm like getting nude on a beach. I am sure they would have done it too if they "had the balls" to do so. I think you should tell them how it made you feel.
2006-12-20 07:21:09 · answer #4 · answered by P W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Excuse me, but am I to understand that you are a young black man who went to a nude beach with three white chicks? I'd be wanting to know why they asked me and didn't get naked more than wondering about the comments. Yes, I think they were being racist - but not based on what they said. If they are walking around in bikinis they are not body shy. So, why did they let you get nude alone? To check out the package and confirm "the rumor" about black men. Racism comes in many forms and I think they were showing their brand.
2006-12-20 10:20:35 · answer #5 · answered by Lisa R 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Don't be too quick to throw in the race card. As with all things, it is important to understand the intent of someone's words or actions. And before you throw away a friendship, I think it is worth a conversation. Starting with the question, "Why did you come to a clothing optional beach if you disapprove of nudity?"
2006-12-21 00:55:24 · answer #6 · answered by Super Ruper 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your reading to much into it. Monkeys walk around with out close is what it sounds like she meant, and since you say this is the only racial thing ever I think you over reacting.And at 18 you are a boy.
2006-12-20 09:12:32 · answer #7 · answered by uthockey32 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The real question is were YOU out of line or just stupid?
why in the world did you strip naked in a public beach in front of girls? it means they dont want you naked
2006-12-20 09:21:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Instead of seeing the comment as a racial slur, try asking Kristin what she meant by that. If she tells you that you look weird being naked, then relax. If she says that it is because monkeys are brown, try not to be offended, just let her know that you don't appreciate her making racial comments insult you.
2006-12-20 03:08:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I find there words very disturbing. And being such that they are high school graduates and now in college. They surely could have chose better words. I have always said, if it is in you it will come out. I would find some other friends to hang out with. They are not worth the energy. And if you do choose to hang out with them, buy them a dictionary. Good luck and God bless****
2006-12-20 03:03:42 · answer #10 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋