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My son's teacher gave me a pamplet about Asperger's syndrome. I have not taken him for a diagnosis yet, and frankly, I am a bit scared of doing it.

Brantley is extremely intellegent. He is 9 years old with a big heart and terrible social skills. He has already been labeled as ADHD although I have not medicated him.

He speaks with an astonishingly good vocabulary, and he reads on a high school level.

When he gets frustrated (really frustrated), he has emotional outbursts. He cries easily, and he gets bullied a lot, although sometimes, he almost brings it on himself.

His motor skills are terrible. He is very uncoordinated with sports, running, and physical activities. He has trouble interacting with peers and would rather be reading, playing video games, etc.

It is strange that Brantley often doesn't do his work at school and is instead reading a book of his choice.
Am I an awful mom for not wanting to get him diagnosed? I want to believe Brantley is normal.

2006-12-20 02:43:38 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science Psychology

11 answers

wow. it sounds like it to me. I understand not wanting him to have Aspergers, but thats not an excuse to not get him diagnosed. don't let fear keep him from getting proper treatment, whatever that may be--it may be just learning new methods to cope and that will make his life easier. good luck to you.

2006-12-20 02:50:36 · answer #1 · answered by -- 4 · 1 0

First of all, you are not an awful mom. It's scary having a child with special needs. In some ways, no kids are 'normal'; they all have something that sets them apart. Many moms would love to see their child voluntarily reading a book!

I do think that you should have him assessed by a psychologist or social worker. You can request one through a special education conference, or you can go to someone privately. The diagnosis itself is somewhat unimportant. A diagnosis is just a description of a collection of symptoms--you already know those symptoms, since you've described them in your question.

What's more important is getting Brantley some social skills training, and possibly some occupational therapy for his motor skills. His life will be lots easier later if he starts learning how to interact now. He needs you, as his mom, to show him that you love him no matter what, but he needs to learn to interact with the outside world in a safer, more productive way.

If his school has a social worker or psychologist on staff, a conversation with them about your concerns could be a good starting point.

2006-12-20 02:54:42 · answer #2 · answered by AClaire 3 · 1 0

I have Asperger's Syndrome myself and used to be identified at an overly younger age. I'm 17 now so i am studying to manage it extra easily. I could say your son does have AS, the attention touch is an visible symptom, had the specified equal factor, however now I've found out to seem humans instantly at their eyes so that they realize I'm speaking to them. I determined it very rough to make peers for the reason that I did not have an understanding of their humour, additionally I used to be regularly referred to as 'posh' for the reason that my vocabulary used to be wider than all people else's. All my existence I've under no circumstances had a lot creativeness, I'll see my more youthful brother gambling with a stick pretending it is a gun and he is in WWII. I under no circumstances did that after I used to be more youthful, the whole thing I did needed to be interactive and truly to me. The motive I say that he in general has AS is for the reason that of ways equivalent he's to me in phrases of persona and the way in which he sees matters, feels like we would get on very good! :) My recommendation is to speak to him approximately it. How he thinks you must speak to him, contact him (Some instances of Asperger's sees kids that detest to be hugged or touched in any respect). At his university, see if there some other kids with Asperger's Syndrome and spot if he could make peers with them, my first friend had Asperger's Syndrome and we received on like a apartment on fireplace :) Hope I helped, Aspergers can also be viewed to be a terrible sickness, however I bear in mind it a reward.

2016-09-03 14:27:24 · answer #3 · answered by durfee 4 · 0 0

Asperger's child are often called "little professors" because they do tend to be book smart, while at the same time way below level socially. My friend's nephew is ten - he is taking college courses, but at the same time doesn't think to give the bus driver his emergency phone list when daddy forgets to meet the bus because "That's not what he asked." Not having your son diagnosied is not going to make him 'normal'. That's like thinking that cancer or diabetes will go away if you don't talk about it. Though it's hard, you have to think of him, now, and not yourself. If he does have Asperger's, he's going to need a lot of special help and having him diagnosed will open the doors for getting that help. You must be his advocate. He can be very high functioning if he gets the right help - he can learn to be social, he can go to college and live alone. But you have to face up and help him.

2006-12-20 03:04:02 · answer #4 · answered by jane7 4 · 2 0

There was a boy in my psychology class who I discovered had Asperger's. He explained it to us when we reached that part in the course and said that when he was younger, it wasn't so much that he felt uncomfortable talking to people as was just uninterested. He would much prefer to go home and sit in front of the tv or read than tell his mother about his day. According to him, he's gotten better socially with age, but we noticed that he still tends not to talk to people that much and is blissfully unaware of certain idiots' snickers as he walks by. He also would have complete emotional break downs occasionally and need to leave the room.

I understand how it's difficult to go get him tested. My parents knew a couple who had two children, both diagnosed with autism early on. The only reason the recognized it was because one parent's sister was a nurse or special ed. teacher or something.

2006-12-20 02:53:20 · answer #5 · answered by Lucky Star 2 · 1 0

It most likely is Asperger's Syndrome. A kid with Asperger's Syndrome is usually brilliant intellectually, but not socially. They have a hard time relating with others, or trying to see situations through the eyes of others. They don't realize when they have hurt someone else's feelings. Their opinions and point of view have priority over anyone else's. I knew a girl who had this, with all the symptoms your son has, but she didn't get diagnosed until she was a teenager. After her behavior was labeled, it was easier to deal with. I'm not sure if she started taking medication or not... I think you ought to get him diagnosed. It will only make his life easier. Do it for the teacher, who is obviously concerned about his future.

2006-12-20 03:01:05 · answer #6 · answered by Melisma 2 · 2 0

Wanting your child to be "normal" is one thing, evasion of reality is another. The fact is a Diagnosis can be helpful to him. You can have aspergers and still be gifted and having a diagnosis is a way of ensuring your child gets the best possible education.

A child with aspergers who gets help early on can learn coping strategies and can get help succeeding in school.

2006-12-21 14:48:06 · answer #7 · answered by voss 1 · 0 0

Some people think Bill Gates has Asperger's Syndrome, so obviously it's not always the worst thing to happen to a person.

But you need to have the child go to a psychiatrist and/or neurologist. If you thought you're child had cancer, you wouldn't hesitate to take them to a doctor would you?

2006-12-20 04:40:41 · answer #8 · answered by wordskillreality 3 · 0 0

Do not ignore it. It is what it is. I know that it's scary at first, but as you learn more, it will get better. I'd say, from what you're writing here, that you already know that he has it. It's ok, and all will be well. I'd reccommend a few support groups for Autism, and Asbergers, in order to help you learn more about how to cope, and how to deal with him. It's a difficult thing to admit that your child is NOT perfect. But perfect is an illusion. He's perfect with his inperfections, just like the rest of us.

2006-12-20 02:54:01 · answer #9 · answered by Rod Farva 2 · 1 0

No, your not a bad mom. It is normal for people to not want to hear bad news. I would, for his sake and your peace of mind, get him checked out by a trusted physician. He sounds like a normal kid to me. He just likes his privacy and enjoys different types of recreation than others. I was the same way as a kid. Not always did I enjoy being around a bunch of other kids. I enjoyed being alone, in my room playing by myself and reading. I liked the sense of being able to explore my imagination with no distraction.

2006-12-20 02:51:26 · answer #10 · answered by Nicky Rae 3 · 1 0

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