Every christmas i have the same problem, my parents are divorced and my mum lives alone. my mum is very ill with arthritis and can hardly move, i have a brother but may aswell not when it comes to helping out with my mum.
My husband is very caring and understanding when it comes to my mum, but i think as the years have gone on and weve spent each xmas with my mum hes patient are starting to wear. Hes parents live in manchester and where down south, last year we tried to do the two in one day (xmas day) but it just didnt work,so we always see them boxing day. There also very understanding but i still feel guilty.
I have to spend xmas with my mum, im all she has and shes understandably suffering from depression so not being there isnt an option. I suggested this year my husband go to his parents with the children and i stay at my mums, but he doesnt want to be without me!
i know there isnt really a solution, just wondered if anyone was looking forward to next week as much as me!!
2006-12-20 00:24:17 · 8 answers · asked by mum 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
my mums house bound so theres no taking her with us tho i wish i could, would be a good solution!
2006-12-20 00:35:41 · update #1
If your husband and his family are understanding then you should not feel bad. You only have one mom and for how long no one knows. Try to let the guilty feeling go and have a good Christmas!! You can only do what you can do!!!!!
2006-12-20 00:31:16 · answer #1 · answered by chilly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i imagine that's because u . s . a . replaced into once (and nonetheless supposedly is) usually Christian. So the holiday replaced into celebrated with the help of a lot of human beings. To the point the position almost anybody replaced into celebrating it. It replaced into basically the norm. So now, Christmas has change into extra so custom than what that is (the social gathering of Jesus's birthday). word I reported social gathering b/c it would not count number at the same time as Jesus replaced into born. the point is he replaced into born and, that's the day we are determining on to have a good time it. in line with all this communicate about it coming from a Pagan holiday. Christmas did not come from the solstice holiday. For one, the time of three hundred and sixty 5 days is a outcome of the Roman holiday of Saturnalia. The time of three hundred and sixty 5 days replaced into chosen as a fashion for Christian (who were present procedure persecution) to cover from Romans, or they'd be killed for being Christian. so as that they keen to have a good time Jesus's beginning discretely. that's unlike they stole some different person's holiday. Secondly, until eventually you actually have a good time Saturnalia or maybe if different Pagan holiday that falls on Christmas, you're celebrating Christmas. And a very small inhabitants actual celebrates the Solstice or Saturnalia. So, many non Christians are celebrating Christmas. Christians don't have a good time holidays that worship different gods. basically an statement...
2016-12-01 00:08:07 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, I have the same problem with you. Both my mom and the mother in law are living alone. So it is so difficult for my husband and I to choose where we should go during the holidays, even the weekends. That will a long standing problem in our marriage. We used to go to my mom one week, and the his mom the next week. But recently a new problem rised, his mom felt we are unfair for the last three weeks. I don't know how to deal with that, I feel so upset about that. We've tried our best. We hope them can give us supports, at least understanding. Fortunately my husband stands on my side. But I am still confused, I don't konw how to do in the future.
2006-12-20 18:56:47 · answer #3 · answered by hellenwashington 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to enjoy the holidays but the last few years I'm starting to dread it. My husband's family, who I thought I got along with fine prior to our marriage (his sister was my best friend), rarely speaks to me anymore and I have discovered they have absolutely no manners. I'm not saying I'm so perfect but manners are a nice guideline. I feel more for my husband's 1st wife now. "She was mean to those kids and nobody liked her." Yeah, she didn't do right by the kids and probably was hateful but I'm finding out she may have had a reason. I don't know if it's being married to this brother or being the stepmother of these 2 kids, but I see why she kept her distance. Good luck!
2006-12-20 00:34:51 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that is a tough one. Why don't you take your mum with you to your husbands parents?
2006-12-20 00:27:34 · answer #5 · answered by Alexandra 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not a good situation, there. This is were compromise in a marriage comes in. You can't leave your mother, he just has to know that. He should by now, anyway.
2006-12-20 00:28:23 · answer #6 · answered by INDRAG? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you could spend christmas eve with one family and christmas day with the other.
2006-12-20 00:29:26 · answer #7 · answered by pebbles 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your husband sounds very sweet and you are a devoted daughter!
happy holidays to you all
2006-12-20 00:31:12 · answer #8 · answered by Tek ~aka~Legs! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋