To Pierce Or Not To Pierce?

Question

What do you think about babies with pierced ears? One of my friends got her daughters ears pierced at a few months old. I didn't say anything as I didn't want to get into an argument wih her but part of me was thinking how could you? I don't think babies are fashion accessories. I have a hard enough time watching my sons having their vaccinations, I couldn't put my baby through completely UNNECESSARY pain. I know for some people, it's a cultural thing but what about those who do it just for the sake of it? Babies will grow into toddlers who are so accident prone it's unbelievable. If there's something to pull, they'll pull it, something they're not allowed to do, they'll make it their job to do it anyway. Why do people do this to the children they're supposed to protect? Just seems ludicrous to me. My friend said her daughter never cried but she didn't know that beforehand, she took a risk. Before anyone asks, yes I have several piercings of my own so i'm not anti-piercings.

Answer 1

I used to live in a town with a large Italian population and all of my Italian friends had their daughters ears pierced. I worked in a daycare as a teen and 4 or 5 times, little girls had earrings ripped out while playing. Twice they were wearing tiny hoops and the hoop caught on a toy and a few times it was a child who accidentally hooked them on clothes or something. A co-worker's daughter got a nasty infection at the piercing site and although that's rare, it's more risk than I'd be willing to take.

I really tried to understand the reasoning "it'll hurt more when they're older", but when I got mine done at 17, I was prepared for that pinch and I was able to care for the site so it didn't get infected. Also, it was my choice...

I just don't get it either. 'Course, I didn't have my sons circumcised for much the same reasons... and I got a lot of flack for that decision from my mom-in-law who told me "they won't feel it honey and if you don't do it, you'll be very sorry later". My guys are 19 & 14 and she's still mad at me for not having it done.

Answer 2

I have to admit, I'm not down w/ piercing a baby's ears either. It's a lot of work for the first little while to maintain the piercings, and they do require long-term care as well. A 3 y/o is not going to know how to take care of her ear piercings! To me, it's just one more thing the mother has to take care of. I first had mine done when I was about 7-8, but my ears kept getting infected, so I opted to let them close up.

To do it so they don't remember the pain? Sheesh. I had mine done the second time when I was 13, and I honestly can't remember how painful it was. I've also been through plenty of more painful things since then, say...childbirth. Yeah...having a moment of sharp pain in your earlobe doesn't hold a candle to that. If ear piercing was SOOOO traumatic, why would we keep doing it? And why would parents subject babies to it?

Even so, it's still up to the parent. I'm not really knocking parents who do it, either. A friend of mine had her twin daughters' ears pierced and gave them different color earrings so she could tell them apart, and I thought that was a pretty clever idea! However, I personally wouldn't let my daughter get hers pierced until she is ready to care for them.

Answer 3

I think it's gross to pierce a baby's ears. A child should be old enough to make the decision for themselves and also old enough to know what's going on before you do something like that. While most girls will want their ears pierced when they're older, some won't. When a girl is 5 or 6, you could start talking to her about it and ask if she wants to do it, but I have a daughter myself and probably won't consider it an option unti she's around 9 or 10. Like you said, babies aren't accessories. Some parents just don't have a brain in their head.

Answer 4

Well my mom pierced my ears when I was 5 months and my sister she waited until she was 11. I am glad I got mine done as an infant because I don't remember the pain. My sister has to go through the helaciousness of cleaning, her ears everyday, which she didn't now they are infected becuase she kept trying to change her earrings every couple of days (your not suppose to change them for six months). Now she has the infection ordeal to go through. So honestly being a child who has had that done to her as an infant I think it's the best way to go and when my daughter is born I will get her ears pierced at 5mths also.

Answer 5

Sounds like you've already made up your mind. I see both sides of the issue, and I think it just all boils down to a personal choice. I personally never had any of my 4 chick-a-dee's pierced as a baby. I have let them grow up and make a decision. I think it's a way to empower a teen or pre-teen, so I've always used the piercing thing to that end. But if you have misgivings about the issue, don't do it. You have to trust your instincts as a parent, and not let your friend's decision influence your own. No explanations necessary!

Answer 6

I dont think baies should get their ears pierced. My Mum got mine done when I was two and all I remember is pain and screaming for hours. I have had my ears repeirced many times cause I'd take them out and the holes would close up. The repeircings I chose to do when I was older. But now I have two daughters of my own Ive let them decide and I was never going to do it if they didnt have a voice to say whether they wanted to or not. I'm proud to say my 6 yr old decided a couple of months back to get her ears done( as she wanted a pair earrings and if she couldnt wear them I wasnt buying them). I didnt to it straight away, I told her o think about it first, I explained that it doesnt really hurt it just stings a bit and if she wanted it done that was OK. A few weeks later she decided to get it done, but I had to get my ears peirced first to prove it didnt hurt that much. After I had mine done she was quite happy to get hers done. She sat still and the ladies at the shop did both her ears at the same time time. Although they lied to her and said it wouldnt hurt. That annoyed her, so when they finished she looked and the mirror and thanked them and then told them that it did hurt. But she didnt cry or flinch. I was a very happy Mum. ANd glad that I'd given her the choice. I also gave my tree yr old the choice and she doesnt want hers done till she's older. But I thought I'd offer seeing she generally likes to copy her sister.

Answer 7

I don't see anything wrong with it as long as they are at least three months old. My husband, on the other hand, doesn't agree with it and he thinks that parents should wait until their kids are old enough to say whether they want their ears pierced or not. I guess different people just have different opinions on it.

Answer 8

People don't pierce their children's ears because they see their kids as an accessory, it's so their children don't remember the pain when they're older.

My mother did it with me when I was a child. When I had 3 more piercings (age 16-17), they were all quite painful and annoying because it was hard to sleep on the pierced side.

I don't see why everyone thinks that simple earrings are so sinful or so like "Oh dear God!!" Most people get them eventually and I know people who wish that they were pierced as a baby like I was. It's rare to see a girl who doesn't have pierced ears...or at least for me.

Answer 9

The only person you could really ask that question is yourself. Not everyone see's this sitaution the way you explained it. You know how sore and how long piercings take before you get used to it. No one really remembers once they are there. I dont think a child is going to keep on tugging on their ears if they know how sore it is everytime they do it.

Answer 10

You know what? I'm right there with you on this one. I don't think it's right that babies should be subjected to unwilling body modifications just because Mommy and Daddy think it's "pretty". It's the kid's own body.. if they want piercings, they'll say so. I got my first pair when I was 4, only because I asked. And throughout my teenage years, my parents were always fine with me coming home with liberty spikes, pierced-up lips, eyebrows, and such. Why? Because it was my own form of personal expression, and the parents always respected that. I guess I'm kind of lucky to have grown up in such a laid-back house.

It sounds like your friend needs to chill out, and realise that's her DAUGHTER'S body, not hers. Things like this need to be the child's own decision.