I have been close friends with her for about two years now! I like her but not like that! I Cant even look at her today. and it gets worse........ its the Christmas party tonight!!!!! What do I do?
2006-12-19 20:53:43 · 45 answers · asked by Nigi-magic 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm a manager! She is Admin!
2006-12-19 20:55:24 · update #1
I have a girlfriend!
2006-12-19 21:04:53 · update #2
If she was half decent you'd not need to ask this question!!!
Comprend 'A'
2006-12-19 21:05:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This isn't something you should just ignore since you do have to work together!
BUT, you have to be certain that she really sent it. It is possible someone else sent it from a web site, but made it look like it came from her.
If you confirm that the message came from her, let her know that you got the it, but that you don't mix business with pleasure. Don't be so serious about it that she'll be embarrassed, but don't leave the door open for her to do it again either. Sometimes a little dash of humour can cut the seriousness of your message but she will still get it loud and clear.
I'm assuming that because you are in management that you take your job seriously and wouldn't jeopardize it by jumping into bed with her because of one silly text message! If you deal with this now in a professional and mature manner, then there is no reason why you can't continue to be friends and work together.
Edit: I just saw your note that you have an girlfriend. If you are close friends with this co-worker then she must know this. Makes me think someone else sent it just to get a rise out of you!
2006-12-19 21:09:59 · answer #2 · answered by pink.vixie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did she appear to be drunk when she sent it? someone else could have used her phone as a prank - does it seem out of character? I think if you've chosen to ignore it and not replied she's probably got the hint - she may feel extremely embarrassed - if it's the Christmas party tonight and you're her manager??? you could address it as being inappropriate - if you're just a manager in general then I guess that's inconsequential to the situation. I would ask to have a chat with her before the party, show her the message and say was this really from you - if she says yes, then tell her it made you feel very uncomfortable - that says everything all in one go - i.e. I'm not interested in you, in that way and please don't do it again.
2006-12-19 21:05:23 · answer #3 · answered by Bee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Feel sorry for you and her. I thinkyou need to ask yourself honestly if you have led her on at all. I mean it is a big leap to send someone an explicit text, especially to a boss. I think you need to really clear this up as soon as possible. She may have let a little crush get out of hand and maybe did it when vunerable or drunk!!!
Whatever it is I would not compromise yourself by 'bangin' her. That is very poor advice and I dont thinkyou wanna do that anyway cos as you say - you dont look at her that way.
I'll bet she is reallly embaressed about it. Why not spare her blushes (and test the water) by saying
'did you text me last night cos I deleted it before I read it'
act all casual and say 'was it something important?'
then if she says 'oh no nothing just to say hi' - you know she didnt really mean for things to go that far. If she still tells you wot the text says to you r face then you have the opportunity to set her straight .
Hope that helps...merry christmas. x
2006-12-19 21:05:21 · answer #4 · answered by The Real Mrs Incredible 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont do anything - dont act any different either though - pretend like you never got it. Then if she sends another one or asks you if you got it simply say that you didnt appreciate her explicitness and that you feel it would jeprodise the working relationship you have with her if you were to become involved - tell her shes a nice girl and you have lots of time for her but just not in that sense as you dont believe in mixing business with pleasure.
Good luck! xx
2006-12-19 20:57:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You obviously need to be straight with her. If you have a girlfriend and you're not interested you need to let her know. I know you're probably flattered by the attention but think of the problems it could cause in your relationship and at work! Things could get nasty if she thinks you've been leading her on. I'd set her straight before the party if you can. Text her if necessary say something like "In response to your text message last night, I'm flattered but I have a girlfriend".
2006-12-19 21:30:46 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ever been unable to fight a desire to send flirty SMSs while drunk? You probably had a case of "intextication"...
Sending an SMS while under the influence can lead to major headaches, especially over the festive season when drinks flow freely.
Ask anyone who sent a racy SMS to a partner, which landed up on the cellphones of parents, or even inlaws.
In a survey by Virgin Mobile, 63% of cellphone users admit failing prey to this embarrassing form of "crossed lines".
And a whopping 72% say they have suffered from intextication.
About 33% of cellphone users have discovered the morning after that they sent an SMS to an ex, and 31% regret having aired their feelings via text messages.
Virgin Mobile reports its findings on intextication:
42% of men engage in festive flirting by sending a text message to someone they secretly fancy when they are drunk;
Women are not so forward, with only 19% admitting to doing the same;
30% of women are struck by 'ex-texting' - sending a message to a former partner;
82% of 18-29-year-olds admit to sending saucy text messages whilst drunk;
4% of men admit to sending a text to the boss when drunk.
2006-12-19 20:57:31 · answer #7 · answered by Neo 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all this will NOT affect your job. You didnt do anything wrong so no worries if you blow her off. But heres the problem. She has the ability to text you. How does she have your cell #? You have been friends for 2 years thats how. Now heres the thing. Men and women CANT be friends if one would have sex with the other. Its not possible. Trust me. Men and women can only be friends when there is no sexual attraction.
2006-12-19 21:05:22 · answer #8 · answered by melvinbenjamin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her one tonight after the party, then give her a P45 as a new years present!haha
all joking aside, tell her you have a girlfriend and are not interested in her in that way; and that sending you texts like that is inappropriate. At the party tonight, make sure you are not alone together
...WHAT DID HER TEXT SAY????
2006-12-19 21:02:52 · answer #9 · answered by kchick8080 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you are going to have to say something to her but don't just sleep with her like some of these idiots have said as you will have more problems with her after that. You can either avoid her or if she approaches you tell her how you feel. You should have replyed to her text last night saying you don't think of her like that. I know it is a very awkward situation but you will have to sort it out before it gets out of hand.
2006-12-19 21:01:55 · answer #10 · answered by koolkatt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You guys should learn to just be straight to a person and tell them how you really feel, maybe just text her back a really friendly text - you know one of those friendship texts - I hate them - but she will get the message! Enjoy ur christmas party!!!
2006-12-19 20:57:44 · answer #11 · answered by Immortal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋