I'm afraid of doing said thing because I don't want to come off as the touchy-feely type of guy. I mean, I can't even initiate a friendly hug with my female friends. I know it's sad to see a 21-year-old guy have this fear. What should I do about this?
2006-12-19 17:11:28 · 14 answers · asked by SkyLordRukaru 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Honestly, the best way to get over it is to start small. My best friend is a 21-year-old guy and has the same issue, but it's only because he's 6'3" and is bigger than most people; he doesn't want to hurt anyone.
But initiating hugs is a good way to start. It's one of the best forms of human contact.
Buena suerte!
2006-12-19 17:14:51 · answer #1 · answered by rayediance 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know of a few steps that you can take
1.when one of your female friends is leaving just walk up to her. if she looks at you and smiles just give her a hug. only use one arm and make it quick. do this until you start to feel more comfortable.
2.when you are comfortable with that move on to giving her two armed hugs.
p.s. looking away makes you look friendly but also takes your mind off of it. Turn your head towards a wall.
Now if this is a girl you like and want to get more physical with there are also a couple of things.
1.when you are sitting there just scoot a little cloers to her.
2.keep scoting until you are touching.
3. if this works out slowly put your arm around her. dont think about it just do it. This will make you comfortable and she will think you are a pro. always have a little smirk no matter how nervous you are.
4. look her in the eyes you should be able to read her body language. after you have gotten that far you will become more confident and many more things will come.
if you need any more advice just let me know. Ill be more that happy to help you out .
2006-12-19 17:24:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When u want to start touching some one. Start as soon as possible. That means when u meet a new person. it should take u no longer than 5 seconds to touch them. (handshake)
Playful touching is the best way to learn how to touch girls.
Here's a guide line,
-hand to shoulder, when u make a point
-poke her belly when u tease her
-pretend to kick her legs
-pretend to punch her
-give her, "The Claw"
-push her lightly when she teases u.
-hit her with a rolled up piece of paper
-pick her up to see how much she weights. Say,"lets see if i can guess how much u weight."
Use normal touching too. Like when, u make a point/statement.
When u want to hug, just say,"Hug." Then do it. Its not a question, its more of a statement.
If your comfortable touching her, then she will feel comfortable with u touching her.
Rules:
Don't, ask her, if its alright to touch her. just do it
Don't, look at your hands, that's touching her.
Don't, touch naughty parts, or sensually caress her.(your not ready yet)
Anytime, u feel like she's creeped out by your touch, STOP.
Have fun.
2006-12-19 17:32:31 · answer #3 · answered by roberto3331 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find one of your female friends that you really trust and confide in them and they may help you get over your fear of touching women. I had the same problem and I had a female and she helped me out alot with my fear of touching or even talking to them.
2006-12-19 17:22:01 · answer #4 · answered by ridemyharley2000_08 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I love hugging my guy friends and they are touchy, feely..but respectable about it ya know?? They know how far is too far, and I am sure you do too. Touching her shoulder or arm or upper back..no biggie. Touching her butt/bosom..yah that is an obvious problem. Just remain respectful and don't touch her anywhere you wouldn't want some guy touching your sister or mom. Just be yourself and don't get nervous or shaky. Just relax and take a deep breath and act natural!! :)
2006-12-19 17:17:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sheesh, that touching guideline Roberto posted sounds like it is for a golden retriever, not a woman.
2006-12-19 17:37:00 · answer #6 · answered by Michelle 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a female friend that you can confide in and see if they would be willing to help you get over the fear. I think you find she would be very helpful.
2006-12-19 17:14:45 · answer #7 · answered by Michael C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
try touching a dude then youll realize how gross that is in 1/2 second, then youll really want to touch your woman
2006-12-19 17:19:25 · answer #8 · answered by storminnormin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh... my... god... Are you kidding me? Hugging is probably one of the least threatening gestures you can do, just do it when you are meeting them or saying good bye. Holding hands also isn't very threatening... Just think of it this way; no harm is going to come out of it!
2006-12-19 17:16:34 · answer #9 · answered by Zach S 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Man, I really dont like touching (like strong hugs n stuff) with girls I don't like. It just pisses me off when some ugly/fat/anorexic chick wants to hug me. Its like 'get te fu*k off me'.
2006-12-20 04:24:29 · answer #10 · answered by st.camilus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋