What to do about the Quiet Guy at work?..... Any quiet guys want to answer?

Question

I usually dont ask for advice like this but I am just so stumped. I am in my 20s so this is weird for me to ask.

Here's the thing. At my place of employment we had to hire extra employees for the Holidays. Well one of the Holiday people is the guy that I have become attracted to.

We have had small talk and have joked around here and there and I always make sure to smile when I catch his eye and he smiles back.

My problem is that beyond the small talk he seems kind of shy and I myself have a very strong personality with only a hint of shyness. I'm just used to being aroud other people with strong personalities like mine.

So my problem is that I want to let him know I am interested ASAP because the Holiday people leave soon and time is ticking. I just dont want him to shy away. At the least I want to just be in contact after he leaves. I also dont just wanna blurt that out.

What do you think is the best approach to this?
Shy Guys..... How do you like to be approached?

Answer 1

I have the opposite problem, I'm the shy guy trying to get an outgoing girl. Right now, it looks pretty dim...

My suggestion is to find the one thing he is confident in, something he can talk alot about and is proud of it.


Example, i'm a runner. I can talk days and days about running related stuff, but sadly the person i like doesn't like running... I can talk to other runners extremely well.

Answer 2

Loud and obnoxious is a male characteristic, because typically males feel the need to dominate (it's a man thing, you wouldn't understand). So it's not a particularly enticing characteristic in girls, except for a few cases where men *are* turned on but such behavior in girls. A quiet girl is intriguing, it makes us want to dig more deep, but only to a certain point. If she's quiet to the point of being consistingly non-responsive, we'll find ourselves being drawn elsewhere.

Answer 3

Simple, Shy guys as a rule don't do well with hints or clues so just ask if he wants to go for coffee or a bar or something after work.

Answer 4

As a recovering shy man, my best advice is to approach him as directly as possible. Ask him if he wants to grab drinks/dinner,etc. after work. I had a lot of trouble picking up on hints. I could talk myelf out of believing even obvious comeons.

Answer 5

Leave the guy alone. If he's antisocial like myself he doesn't want to talk to any of you. I don't get it why anytime your around people it has to be some socialfest. Let the guy just do his job!! Hate people like that.

Answer 6

well I used to be shy then I decided that I don't care what people think so I am who I am. anyways back to your question, just ask him out in a very simple way such as "you want to go somewhere together", simple yet effective

Answer 7

I'm a shy guy... And if you don't approach me, I might not know that you are interested... So it's up to you to make the move...

Answer 8

Hey there! Some of my suggestions are that, if possible, try to talk to him more during work. Of course, you can't stand there all day and talk, but you can say, "Hey, since we don't have time to talk, let's call each other later on tonight!" And you can go ahead and give him your number! And when he calls you (or you calling him), try to keep the conservation as lively as possible! Try to keep him intrigued while talking, and since you do have a strong personality, don't be too pushy.
Another thing at work: try to come up to him and tell him, "Hey, would you like to go with me for some coffee, or etc? "I've got a coupon for buy one, get one free, and it runs out tonight (not necessarily, but a small, white lie wouldn't hurt!) Nobody else is interested in wanting to go with me! Would you like to come with me?" And wouldn't hurt saying all that! When you say it, be serious, with a serious look on your face (please don't be stern while doing this) and he'll most likely to accept!! Or if you like you can say, "Hey, I'm going to grab something to eat, would you like something back?" But if he says no, don't despair.
But whatever you do, do be friendly with him! Be nice and keep smiling like you have been doing! Now, before he leaves, tell him sincerely that you hate to see him leave, but you definitely want to keep in touch with him! Again, if you already have exchanged numbers, get cell phone numbers, or e-mail addresses especially, if he doesn't like to talk a lot! And when you do get in touch with him after he's left, tell him, "My God, you don't know how much I miss you not being there at work with me!!" Hopefully, he should open up from there. But do take things slowly, trying to talk more, then asking him would he like to go to the movies, mall, or dinner! Again, when you start going places together, don't be pushy. Hold his hand like he is the most important thing on your mind, and most importantly, that you enjoy his company!
Take it from me, I'm a quiet guy, and I love it when girls give me subtle hints that they are interested! I like it when they give me compliments, say or do nice things to/for me! Of course, personality is important, but since you have a strong one, try to tone it down, since you are dealing with him because you don't want to scare him off!! It's a good thing that women are starting to notice the quiet guys because some of them are starting to realize the popular guys that everyone like, aren't always the nicest ones to deal or be with! Those men are the ones who are egostical, vulgar, and obnoxious, more of a headache of anything. Like a good female friend had told me, she always liked the quiet boys in school because they are much more attractive (inside and out), mannerable, and most importantly, a gentleman! She found the popular guys as arrogant and the other words that I describe from, because again, men like that, just care about their egos and how many women that they can pick up! To me, having a good heart and mind is much more important because they'll always last forever than so having an attractive face and body! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder!
Good luck, and let me know if you need any more advice, from a quiet guy!

Answer 9

I am usually to shy to ask girls out, unless i know that they are attracted to me, i would let him know, just ask him to lunch or something, show him that ur interested

Answer 10

Just ask him if he wants to do something after work....it would work on me. You will have to-we can't help the shyness.