I have been together with my boyfriend for almost five years and I am really happy with him. The problem is that I don't really like his family. His parents are really nice to me but I find them very different than my parents. It is a family that no one knows of and I simply don't really like them. For this reason I am starting to have doubts on my boyfriend and I don't know what to do. I really love him, he is a great guy, responsabile, respectful and really loves me but everyone tells me that I just don't get married with him, I get married wih the whole family. Should I break up with him?
2006-12-19 13:37:06 · 16 answers · asked by amy r 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Hi hon...
If you end up marrying this guy, you'll be spending Thanksgivings, Christmases, birthdays, and tons of other occasions with his family, so you should definitely think about your capability to put up with your guy's relatives for long periods of time before you commit to him forever.
On the other hand, there are definitely ways that a relationship can work when one of the partners doesn't like the other partner's family....neither of my parents really likes the other one's family, but they've been happily married for almost 30 years! If you really love this guy and want to make it work, I think you could definitely find a way to compromise the amount of time you spend with his family, etc.
I guess it all comes down to what you feel you're willing to put up with for this guy's sake. Is he worth enduring years with a family you don't really like, or not? How will you feel about spending the most important occasions in your life with his extended family? Is it worth it?
Only you know, hon....best of luck to you.
2006-12-19 13:45:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, No you are not marrying his whole family. When you go to the alter is his family expected to give their I do's? No. It is "I now pronounce you man and wife." Not "I now pronounce you man wife and the in-laws." Besides, with most couples today, the spouse can't stand the others family. It is common in marriages and has no real effect on the couple and their relationship.
2006-12-19 21:42:42 · answer #2 · answered by Angel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it would be awful to break it off with him because you dont' like his family, if you get married you just put up with them because you love him but if you don't love him enough then get out now
2006-12-19 21:39:56 · answer #3 · answered by cutiepie81289 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did his family ruin your 5-year relationship?
You are thinking too much negative when nothing really happens.
It's a must that you also marry his family...coz in times of problems you will also need them.
2006-12-19 21:44:12 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I think that would be a bad reason to break up with him. His family is only one factor to consider. Perhaps family is important to you. However, it seems like there are many other factors which say it is wise to stay with him.
2006-12-19 21:46:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
understand your bf's stand on this, if your bf is going to stay with his family (parents) after marriage, and if you can accept it, you have to find your own solutions to like his family.
Else, time to end the relationships, it will be getting to no where.
Only if you change your mindset, then you can try to accomodate the difference between the two family members.
2006-12-19 21:45:12 · answer #6 · answered by ricodzeus 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u love him it shouldn't matter. if he is a nice guy and u love him than try to understand that people are different, families are different, u may be throwing away a wonderful man, just because of this one thing.
2006-12-19 21:41:09 · answer #7 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its really inmature to say that you just dont like, for no reason.. if you love your boyfriend you dont have like his family, but you should at least give them a chance...
2006-12-19 21:39:52 · answer #8 · answered by ~♥Jade♥~ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well.. here is the thing... in marriages "marring the family" only applies to the guy... in the 15 years my dad and step mom have been together, my dad always spends holidays with my step moms family... ive seen this in other relationships too... very rarely have i seen a couple who spends time with both sides equally.
2006-12-19 21:41:14 · answer #9 · answered by ryanisalifestyle 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
lots of people don;t like their in laws he may not like yours either, if you both really love each other you will find a way to get along with them ,who says you have to see them every day unless they will always be dropping in.how about moving to another state.,far away from them,you may never find a man with parents you will like,try and be nice to them how would you like it if he didn't like your parents he may not but still tries to be nice cause he loves you, I COULD UNDERSTAND IF THEY WAS MEAN TO YOU if you really loved him you'd try to be nice to them too.
2006-12-19 21:57:06 · answer #10 · answered by deedee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋