ive been cutting on and off for about three years and cant stop!?

Question

I was admitted to a psych ward exactly one year ago and when i got out i was still cutting. I was seeing alot of shrinks (they all gave up on me) and i still couldn't stop cutting. I DO NOT CUT FOR ATTENTION! i did not want my cutting to be known but the school counselor somehow found out. Im 16 now and started when i was 13. When i started it was just scratches and now i am not satisfied unless its deep enough to bleed...alot. I have tried really hard to stop but i just cant. For me its like an addiction that keeps getting worse. I dont want to let my family down again so i cant ask for help. Can anyone think of anything to do that will help me stop for good?
Let me give you a background. I started cutting as a game to see who was the toughest. I always won. My dad had some anger issues and i would slash up my arms with razors and the sharp sides of scissors . I NEED to stop and need help! Any suggestions?!?!

was admitted to a psych ward exactly one year ago and when i got out i was still cutting. I was seeing alot of shrinks (they all gave up on me) and i still couldn't stop cutting. I DO NOT CUT FOR ATTENTION! i did not want my cutting to be known but the school counselor somehow found out. Im 16 now and started when i was 13. When i started it was just scratches and now i am not satisfied unless its deep enough to bleed...alot. I have tried really hard to stop but i just cant. For me its like an addiction that keeps getting worse. I dont want to let my family down again so i cant ask for help. Can anyone think of anything to do that will help me stop for good?
Let me give you a background. I started cutting as a game to see who was the toughest. I always won. My dad had some anger issues and i would slash up my arms with razors and the sharp sides of scissors . I NEED to stop and need help! Any suggestions?!?! ive already been on antidepressants with no luck, and cant find a shrink

I cant find any activities that distract me. Im constantly thinking about it. Therapists and drugs dont help either

For the past couple of weeks ive been having dreams of loved ones dying right in front of me. I know they are fake but its really hard to take, and pushing me to the point where im about ready to try and kill myself again if i have another dream like that...

ice water, drawing, etc, does not work. i NEED to see blood. as disturbing as that sounds, its the truth

Answer 1

If you've been cutting and you want to stop, here are some approaches that might help you.

For people who cut, doing something different may be a big change. Making this change can take time because you are learning new ways of dealing with the things that led you to cut. The tips you'll see below can get you started. But a therapist or counselor can do more to help you heal old hurt and use your strengths to cope with life's struggles.

Start by being aware of which situations are likely to trigger your urge to cut. Make a commitment that this time you will not follow the urge, but will do something else instead.

Then make a plan for what you will do instead of cutting when you feel this urge.

Below are some tips you can try when you feel the urge to cut. We've put them into several categories because different people cut for different reasons. So certain techniques will work better for some people than others.

Look through all the tips and try the ones that you think might work for you. You may need to experiment because not all of these ideas will work for everyone. For example, some readers have told us that snapping a rubber band works for them as a substitute for cutting but others say that the rubber band triggers an urge to snap it too hard and they end up hurting themselves.

If one tip isn't right for you, that's OK. Use your creativity to find a better idea. Or talk with your therapist to get other ideas on what could work for you. The idea is to find a substitute for cutting — something that satisfies a need you might feel without being as harmful as cutting.

You may also find that one of these ideas works for you sometimes but not always. That's OK too. What a person needs can vary from time to time and from situation to situation.

Following the techniques listed below will help you think about why you might cut. The more you learn about what's underneath your cutting behavior, the better you will be able to understand and develop healthy ways to heal that pain.

Things That Might Distract You

Like all urges, the urge to cut will pass if you wait it out. Distracting yourself with something else helps time go by and gets your mind off the urge to cut. The more you wait out the urge without giving in, the more your urges will decrease over time.

Here are some things you can try while waiting for a cutting urge to pass:

* call a friend and talk about something completely different
* take a shower (make sure you don't have razors in the shower)
* go for a walk or run, take a bike ride, dance like crazy, or get some other form of exercise
* play with a pet
* watch TV (change the channel if the show gets upsetting or features cutting)
* drink a glass of water

Things That Might Soothe and Calm You

Sometimes people cut because they're agitated or angry — even though they may not recognize that feeling. If that's true for you, it can help to do something calming when you feel the need to cut.

Even if you're not sure why you're cutting, it's worth giving these ideas a try:

* play with a pet
* take a shower (make sure you don't have razors in the shower)
* take a bath (make sure you don't have razors near the tub)
* listen to soothing music that will shift your mood
* try a breathing exercise
* try some relaxing yoga exercises

Things That Might Help You Express the Pain and Deep Emotion

Some people cut because the emotions that they feel seem way too powerful and painful to handle. Often, it may be hard for them to recognize these emotions for what they are — like anger, sadness, or other feelings. Here are some alternatives to cutting that you can try:

* draw or scribble designs on paper using a red pen or paint on white paper — if it helps, make the paint drip
* write out your hurt, anger, or pain using a pen and paper
* draw the pain
* compose songs or poetry to express what you're feeling
* listen to music that talks about how you feel

Things That Might Help Release Physical Tension and Distress

Sometimes, doing things that express anger or release tension can help a person gradually move away from cutting. Try these ideas:

* go for a walk or run, ride a bike, dance like crazy, or get some other form of exercise
* rip up some paper
* write out your hurt, anger, or pain using a pen and paper
* scribble on paper using a red pen
* squeeze, knead, or smoosh a stress ball, handful of clay, or Play-Doh

Things That Might Help You Feel Supported and Connected

If you cut because you feel alone, misunderstood, unloved, or disconnected, these ideas may help:

* call a friend
* play with a pet
* make a cup of tea, some warm milk, or cocoa
* try some yoga exercises that help you feel grounded, such as triangle pose
* try a breathing exercise like the one in the button above
* curl up on your bed in a soft, cozy blanket

Things That Are Substitutes for the Cutting Sensation

You'll notice that all the tips in the lists above have nothing to do with the cutting sensation. When you have the idea to self-injure, start by trying the ideas on those lists — such as making art, walking your dog, or going for run.

If they don't help, move on to the substitute behaviors shown below.

These substitute behaviors won't work for everyone. They also don't help people get in touch with why they are cutting. What they do is provide immediate relief in a way that doesn't involve cutting, and therefore holds less risk of harm.

* rub an ice cube on your skin instead of cutting it
* wear a rubber band around your wrist and snap it gently against your skin
* draw on the skin with a soft-tipped red pen in the place you might usually cut

Cutting can be a difficult pattern to break. But it is possible. If you want help overcoming a self-injury habit and you're having trouble finding anything that works for you, talk with a therapist. Getting professional help to overcome the problem doesn't mean that someone is weak or crazy. Therapists and counselors are trained to help people discover inner strengths that help them heal. These inner strengths can then be used to cope with life's problems in a healthy way.

Reviewed by: D'Arcy Lyness, PhD
Date reviewed: February 2006
http://www.kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/problems/resisting_cutting.html
http://www.kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/feeling_sad/cutting.html

Answer 2

Well you need to get help. Find a mental health counselor to work with you. Tell your parents! You say you don't want to let your family down but how do you think they're going to feel when they find you dead because you accidentally cut too far or lost too much blood. For the time being, ice water is a great distraction. Some psych wards will use whats called a "cold wet sheet pack", basically wrapping your body in cold wet sheets. In lowers your blood pressure, and practically eliminates your thoughts (your body also uses its own heat to warm you up creating a very therapuetic response). Now I'm not suggesting you wrap yourself up and run around the house using your moms bedsheets, but plunging your hands into a sink full of ice water will create just about the same response. (Plus it's the whole use pain to treat pain method). And still go and get help!

Answer 3

Please go to your community mental health agency. They can and will help you and you can talk to your counselor there about being readmitted to a program. All shrinks are not the same. A good one, and it may take several tries to get to the right one, will help you find the root cause of this self-destructive act. You have a hard, long trip ahead of you but you can overcome it. You should not feel that you're letting your family down by letting them know. It is no different seeking help for this condition than if you broke your leg a year ago and then broke it again this year. What you have is an illness or psychic injury and you must get professional, caring assistance right away. Our prayers and concerns are for you. God Bless You.

Answer 4

I'm not sure that you CAN'T stop. I mean you could if you wanted to.

Here's what I think about cutting. Cutting is a pathetic activity, and it should be banned from all people's minds. I know people who do it for the hell of it. I know people who think it's cool to cut because everyone's doing it. I know people who cut for attention.

Apparently, your reason for cutting is... because you "need" to see blood? Okay, I won't criticize your needs. Here, since you need to see blood, why not have a little bucket full of your own blood. You have probably bled enough to form that little bucket anyway. Just look at it. Then, there, you "see" blood.

Wonderful solution... yes? I might sound like I'm mocking you. That's because I am.

I'm sorry, but cutting isn't an answer to anything. Think about it. Okay... so you just gave yourself a little cut on your arm. Oh my god, what about it? You're abusing yourself because why? You think it's going to help? I seriously don't see the point of cutting because it's beyond unreasonable.

It doesn't help you solve any problem. It doesn't take away your pain.. emotionally or physically. In fact, you're giving yourself even more pain. But who knows, you like that right?

Face reality. It's the best solution to anything. Trust me, cutting may only add to the problem.

Believe me, help is offered everywhere.

LET YOUR FAMILY KNOW. I think they'd rather know that you have started to continue your activities. Seriously, if your parents care, they won't yell at you. In fact, they'd try to help you as much as they can.

However, they can only do so much. It is YOU that has to do most of the stuff. You have to motivate yourself to quit. If you don't resist from cutting, you will just keep doing it. Then, you'll never stop. You are the only person that can help yourself the most. You have the power. You can control yourself. Control is the key here. If you don't control yourself, you can never quit cutting.

Answer 5

You need to go into a Hospital for a While!! Until it totally stops, and you have NO more thoughts of cutting or Blood!!
You might end up killing yourself if you keep on doing this, and then you would totally let down your family!! This is the best thing for right now!! WHat if you hit a Vain or blood vesal and bleed to death?!?!?! Think about it!! Go into a Hospital, where they can TRY and help once more, for a long time!! Tell them your thoughts, and why you do it, do Not hold back!!

Answer 6

i understand how you are feeling and how hard it can be to stop something, i have not ever cut myself, but i do know what your going through. go reasearch over the internet for help hotlines so you can let everything you need to share out. it's confidential and they cant tell anyone so you should feel comfortable. if that doesnt work then go to a doctor, without your parents are sit down and talk with them. they can have it be confidential also. i really think you should go somewhere to talk because this is serious, if you dont stop cutting then you just might cut one of your vains and you really will have killed yourself. about the dreams, i have had those too, but you shouldnt be having the feeling of wanting to die because of them. maybe you should ask your doctor about depression pills or just something to calm you down. i wish i could help you out more, but i guess i cant.

so good luck!!! =]

Answer 7

at least you know you have a problem, now that you know you NEED to stop, it shouldn't be that hard, just make yourself choose between cutting and your family. You have a problem and if you can't control it, your family will eventually find out and then you will put back in a psych ward. Do you really want that? I don't think so. Please think about this. I don't know if you are religious or not but you need to pray for yourself. Good luck!

Answer 8

sounds like you're a normal, healthy 15 y/o guy to me. I used to go about five or six times a day at that age. It's harmless. But, don't be doing it in public. This is a private thing. Keep it to yourself.

Answer 9

You obivously feel comfort from pain/blood, it calms you down, or it could be that your just bored and have nothing better to do. To stop the cutting do other stuff, fill up your free time. Hang out with friends constanly, find hobbies, take up something like guitar or drums, join sports, join groups, help out with the chruch, etc.

Answer 10

Therapy, and distractions. There are other ways to deal with the masochistic feelings. My therapist suggested taking super hot baths, and filling a pitcher with ice water and plunging your hand & arm in it and keeping it in there until you can't take it anymore.