Confidence and Self Esteem?

Question

Does anyone have any advice on how I can improve my self esteem and confidence without having to seek professional help. Having no confidence and self esteem is making life hard and sucks!

Answer 1

Here is how to boost your self confidence. Good luck! I really hope this helps you.

Emphasize your Strengths. Give yourself credit for everything you try. By focusing on what you can do, you applaud yourself for efforts rather than emphasizing end products. Starting from a base of what you should do helps you live within the bounds of your inevitable limitations.

Take Risks. Approach new experiences as opportunities to learn rather than occasions to win or lose. Doing so opens you up to new possibilities and can increase your sense of self-acceptance. Not doing so turns every possibility into an opportunity for failure, and inhibits personal growth.

Use Self-Talk. Use self-talk as an opportunity to counter harmful assumptions. Then, tell yourself to "stop" and substitute more reasonable assumptions. For example, when you catch yourself expecting perfection, remind yourself that you can't do everything perfectly, that it's only possible to try to do things and to try to do them well. This allows you to accept yourself while still striving to improve.

Self-Evaluate. Learn to evaluate yourself independently. Doing so allows you to avoid the constant sense of turmoil that comes from relying exclusively on the opinions of others. Focusing internally on how you feel about your own behavior, work, etc. will give you a stronger sense of self and will prevent you from giving your personal power away to others.

Answer 2

There Is No Easy Answer Here Unfortunately. The Best Advice One Can Offer Is To Accept Who You Are As You Are. This Does Take Time And You May Have To Change Some Of Your Ideals About Yourself.

Try Very Hard Not To Measure Yourself By Others. You Are The ONLY One Who Can Judge How Well You Are And How Well You Are Doing. Others Opions Of You Are Just That; Opinions.

Be Honest And Frank With Yourself. If You Find There Is Something You're Not Proud Of But Can Live With, Then Do So.

If, On The Other Hand, You Find There Are Things About You That You Can't Live With, Answer These Questions;
1. Is This Something You Can Change?
2. Is It Part Of What Makes You You?
3. Are You Sure That If You Try And Change This You Will Be Happier?

If The Answer To The First Question Is That It Is Something You Can Change Then Be Sure To Answer Honestly The Next Questions.

If The Answer To The Second Question Is That It Is What Makes You You, Then You Need To Accept That And Try To Appreciate That That Is One Of Your Special Qualities.

If The Answer To The Third Question Is You're Not Sure, Then Hold Your Course And Watch What Other Do And How It Turns Out For Them.

Things To Remember-

You Are Who You And That Will Never Change, Habits May Change But The Inner You Will Not, Allow It To Grow.

You Cannot Change The Course Of The River, If That's What You're Trying To Do You Will Fail.

Life Seems Harder When You're Younger.

Since I Don't Know What The Context Of Your Lack Of Self Esteem Really Is, By That I Mean How Are You Measuring This? And In What Situations Is It Occuring, I Cannot Offer Better Advice Than To Say, As Long As You're Not Hurting Anyone Else You're Not Doing To Bad.

The Hardest Part Of Learning Is That You Must Jump IN Feet First And Not Be Afraid To Try. This Is The Way Of Learning And You Will Make Mistakes, The Key Here Is To Learn From Your Mistakes And Change To Accomodate. If You Follow This Approach Your Life Will Find It's Groove And You Will Be Much Happier.

I Wish You Well.

Answer 3

Hello Heidi : yes there is an way to improve yourself's esteem
just follow a good example here
1greet others towards people
2 be happy person and trust friendships
3 relax also take an deep breath every day
4 find confidence in social places
5 keep confidences that yourself esteems will get better !
see all 5 is teaching you things have proven 100% needs more ok?

Answer 4

When I feel low, I like to sit infront of the mirror and point out what I like! I'm sure there are pleanty of things you can find that are beautiful! Take yourself shopping next time you get a little extra money or go get your nails done! And never hang around people who only want to bring you down...they're not true friends. If you like rap, a new song that I really love, and its sort of talking about girls with low self-esteem, is "Run Away Love."

Hopefully I helped!

Answer 5

Try not to compare yourself with others. Remember that some people who appear to be very talented, either academically or otherwise, have been cheating to get ahead, and all of their benefits, advantages and opportunities may not have been honestly attained. I personally believe that people are born with about the same potential, but they just seem to get things and opportunites robbed from them, or else they do not take the time, effort and interest to develop them to their full potential.

Here is a quotation. What do you think of this one?

"I don't want hope. Hope is killing me. My dream is to become hopeless. When you're hopeless you don't care. And when you don't care, that indifference makes you attractive."

"So, hopelessness is the key?"

"It's my only hope."

- Seinfeld

A person's interests and activities tend to define the individual and probably he or she has acquired them because they were perceived to be attractive.

I think you have to stop worrying about other people. The world is full of a lot of strange and twisted people nowdays. Many times they put others down because they themselves feel inadequate and they think they can bolster their own image in this way.

BEWARE OF VOLUNTEERING. VOLUNTEERS IN MANY PLACES GET ROBBED (I.E. KILLED). THE PLACES THAT SOLICIT VOLUNTEERS OFTEN DO NOT NEED THEM. THEY HAVE PEOPLE WORKING AS PAID VOLUNTEERS.

Answer 6

Capitalize on your success. Use positive communication. Show gratitude and appreciation for others.

Apply "self talk" by using affirmations. "I love and accept myself."

Create mindsets. Avoid making up excuses rationalizing reasons for failure or mistakes. Instead, "re-frame" things in a positive way
Value and acknowledge others. Reach out to people.

Avoid expecting too much of others. Be self-responsible. Do not expect the world to be warm and safe.

Relieve boredom by creating variety in life. Do new and different meaningful things/experiences.

Take control of your life. Write your own script.

Confront yourself to accept "change" as a necessary challenge.

Eliminate fears of failure and success. Do what you believe is best for you.

Answer 7

I read a book that made a world of difference to me. It was called Self Matters by Dr. Phil McGraw. Good luck. Also, think about just finding things to do for other people...even anonymously, like a card through the mail, or left on someone's desk, or making cookies, or whatever....It seems to make a difference to take the attention off yourself, and focus on someone else. It also makes you feel better about yourself.

Answer 8

Just realize how screwed up everyone else is and you do not have to prove yourself to anyone...

This is the hardest part because we always want to look good and strong and smart and attractive to others and we feel weak if we do not....

It isn't a big thing...most of the people who give you a hard time...have an even worse self concept then you do....

go about your business and see how people treat you when you even pretend not to care about what they think.

Answer 9

Try Real Self-Esteem Now from the website:
http://www.thinkrightnow.com

I've used it and it works!

Answer 10

Smile! Smiling helps you to feel good about yourself (something to do with the way that the brain links feelings and actions), If you're shy, try just smiling, saying 'hi' to random people in the street, it'll feel wierd at first, but you have to break the 'pain barrier' so to speak. Good luck!