My g/friend and I have broken up several times. Usually she breaks up with me because she thinks I'm "not into her". Then each time she writes me emails saying how I've wasted her time and she wishes she had never met me. Then after a few weeks she will say how much she misses me and time we get back together...this has happened 4 times now. To be honest, I feel almost "guilted" back into seeing her. Then when I do see her I also realize I miss her. It just makes me wonder though if I'm with her out of guilt, lust, or love. I do hate hurting her but dang it I want to be sure she is the one for me. I worry she'll play this guilt game even worse if and when we're married to get her way.
I say this because another girl and I very much like each other now (as friends). It is just that I now have nearly 3 years of history with my g/friend. Starting over with another woman seems like such a task. Does my g/friend really love me or is she just being desperate?
2006-12-19 08:49:42 · 13 answers · asked by Bill 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Move on my brother. Your girlfriend is only showing the tip of her crazy, manipulative, and mentally f---ed up iceberg. Go conquer some new teritory and give the looney bizzle a kick out the door.
2006-12-19 08:59:08 · answer #1 · answered by Eldude 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You two have a mutually dysfunctional relationship. You both use each other for convenience and to hang onto the remnants of what once was.
It's time to end the drama and move on. Three years is no reason to keep reliving the problem. If she were the one you would have already known and you two wouldn't keep breaking up. She's not the one and you both should stop wasting your time. She seems incapable of doing so, therefore it is up to you if you have the strength.
Tell her you are breaking it off permanently. Do not allow yourself to be drawn back into her soap opera and resist the temptation by not opening her emails (put her into your spam blocker) or taking her calls.
2006-12-19 16:55:15 · answer #2 · answered by Karen L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you need to figure out if you want to give this relationship an honest go and then if you decide that you do you need to talk with your girl and ask her to cut out the drama.(its to high school)The dumping and getting back together thing is old and is most likely becoming tiresome.If she can't work out your guys problems in a more constructive manner then you need to cut your losses and move on.And no matter how much history you have with someone it doesn't mean that you should put up with behaviour that is mentally and emotionally draining.Good luck!
2006-12-19 16:59:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well first off from what you have written here I dont think your gf is way off base when she says your not into her. Your only argument for staying with her is that its too much hassle to start new. You even like another girl. Is your gf really that wrong in what she is thinking ? She gets angry with you because she has devoted 3 yrs of her life to you and she doesn't feel your putting enough into it. And this whole I think I go back with her out of guilt bs is just that, bs. Nobody does anything they dont want to do. Your either going to decide that you want to stay with her and treat her right or your not.
2006-12-19 16:59:24 · answer #4 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Out of the three yrs she has done the same thing over and over again, you should of let go 2 yrs ago, but since you didn't, my advice is the next time she breaks up with you over something stupid or you break up with her go ahead and look for someone else, not a relationship, but a date, a few dates, explore the world and the more apprecitive women in it.
2006-12-19 16:56:45 · answer #5 · answered by babyluv145 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any on-again/off-again relationship has little chance of making it very far or being very satisfying no matter how far it does go.
MANY people are in relationships (including marriages) for years and then have them end and move forward into dating again.
Let this chick go...she's too wishy-washy to even consider keeping around long term so cut your losses now and move on...perhaps you'll meet someone who knows more about what they want...
2006-12-19 16:53:26 · answer #6 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
actually You need to move on seperate yourself from her. You can have friends that is her friend. but just ask them to not tell you what is going on with her. I know people that like to be friends after the relationship. But alot of times it unhealthy. If You are feeling guilty or things are making You feel guilty, that she is sending You. For Your own good cut the ties. period. put Her letters on spam. You need a clean break.
2006-12-19 16:56:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like she's being needy and posessive, even though she's not feeling fulfilled by your relationship anymore. I would suggest that you ask her to evaluate your relationship together before she wants you to get back together again. In the meantime, invest in the second girl. You never know where that may lead.
2006-12-19 16:54:16 · answer #8 · answered by floppybelly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your ex, she still loves you. She didn't want to go. She didn't want to leave you. She was just scared that you would hurt her. Don't hurt her, get back together and tell her that you would never do anything to hurt her. If you don't want her anymore, tell her that you still love her to death as a friend, but that you two just weren't meant for eachother.
<3 Pat
2006-12-19 16:54:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your girlfriend keeps dumping you as a test. She just wants to see if you'll be upset and come back for her.
She sounds really immature. It's time you move on to a more stable relationship.
2006-12-19 16:52:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋