My boyfriend and I have religious and personal beliefs about sex before marriage so we don't do it. I am a virgin and he told he was too but lately I dont know anymore. He mentioned to me on the phone that he still needed to work on "his rythmen"? he said he was joking cause he knows that I am very jelous about other girls and was just messing with me, how do i know if he has had sex or is having it now? what would be the benifit to him if he tells me he is a virgin and knows that i am too??? how can i know if he really is seeing other girls behind my back and/or sleeping with them, and I have already asked him and he said no.
2006-12-19 04:28:57 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My God, it must be amazing to live at your level of amoeba like existence. All the ridiculously petty so called problems that you have.... I can stands no more!
2006-12-19 04:34:30 · answer #1 · answered by Oliver T 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's definitely forgivable, and as a guy I can say that i say some stupid lies relating to all sorts of things, especially earlier on in the relationship. When he said he wasnt a virgin, it's just one of the lies that sort of comes out at early stages of a relationship, whether it's to come across as 'better' in some way or whatever. Assuming he was the one that told you, feel good he at least felt the need to tell you, it means he felt the guilt of lying before you 2 got together. He could have easily have kept the lie going on for life if he had wanted. It's all about trust, and before you were dating you probably didnt trust each other nearly as much as you do now, admitting that he lied in my opinion only proves the growing of the trust and relationship. Yes it was wrong, really, lying tends to be, but he probably feels like an idiot right now.
2016-05-23 07:34:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he hasn't given you any reason to think he is cheating on you like, times he can't account for I wouldn't worry that he might be cheating on you. I don't know about the knowing for sure that he is a virgin. He might be or he might be saying that because he knows how set you are on that situation. If you truly love each other that should not matter as long as you are faithfully together now. There of course are some men out there that might have sex with other women if your partner won't. If that is the case than he obviously was not the guy you thought he was or wanted you to think he was. How long of a time period are you talking about here too? Are you engaged and committed to getting married any time soon? Unless he is really really religious I couldn't forsee him waiting any longer than a yr. If you are suspicious than that might be a sign you should check things out. Then again maybe he is ......unknowingly to you trying to make you feel guilty or uncomfortable about waiting hoping you will change your mind. Be honest with him and talk all this out with him. You should be able to tell if you are asking him face to face if he is being totally honest with you.
2006-12-19 04:45:57 · answer #3 · answered by tessie452004 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, so how does he know YOU aren't messing around on him? Most relationships are a two-way street, you know. Short of getting matching chastity belts, I don't think you can know if he's a virgin or not. One thing you can BOTH do is to submit to STD testing prior to marriage, to ensure blissfully worry-free sex thereafter.
In my opinion, you both need to mature a bit before you get married and it would be a good start in that direction to show a little more trust, or this will be a recurring issue throughout your marriage. Good luck.
2006-12-19 04:38:48 · answer #4 · answered by Jeff W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont ever trust anyone 100 percent in the beginning... You should have him tested and you too to make him feel better for STD's... He could be telling you he is a virgin to have sex with you without a condom... dont do it. Sounds like you two are Nowhere near ready to move to the Sex Stage..so move on if it is a big issue.
2006-12-19 04:33:06 · answer #5 · answered by yo mama 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could ask his friends. You could try contacting his old girlfriends. Other than that, there really isn't much you could do to find out. But if you don't think you can trust him, that's a bigger issue already. He might not be your best choice if you're suspicious of him. He might be being honest, but if his manor is something that makes you uneasy now, it will more so when you're married.
2006-12-19 04:42:01 · answer #6 · answered by Sean J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like there are some underlying issues. Usually when there is this much doubt and especially when someone's fidelity is in question it's a sign that it's time to move on.
There HAS to be trust. It doesn't seem like there is much here.
Good luck!
2006-12-19 04:35:55 · answer #7 · answered by mamabunny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And if he is lying??? Could you forgive him?? How strong is your relationship if it just centers around whether or not you have sex? Is religion the only thing that hold you two together? And if you both are torturing yourselves, just get married and aleviate yourselves of that taboo. If you have doubts and keep questioning him...you do not trust him. If you do not trust him, you do not love him, and if you do not love him...MOVE ON.
2006-12-19 04:33:21 · answer #8 · answered by Marilyn C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, there's not much benefit to telling someone "Hey, I have no experience in this and will probably make the experience (if it ever happens) very awkward and not too exciting. I would think that he's seen a couple "movies" and maybe a couple web sites that have given him some sense of experience.
2006-12-19 04:32:18 · answer #9 · answered by jeepguy_2x 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Trust is the essence of friendship. If you can't trust him, he ain't your friend!
2006-12-19 04:31:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋