I have everything I need but a great girlfriend in my life, why can't I hold on to one?

Question

I have a great job, going back to school to complete my masters, Im healthy, good looking 24 year old, with a great band, income, car, apartment, but I can't seem to hold on to one girl. I've been promiscuous and when i finally gave that up for 1 girl, i screw it up, and i lie about certain things so i wont get in trouble, and i just want to finally stop being such an immature prick and be in a stable healthy relationship. What can i do? where can i find this? Does it take time to realize what to do? Im a one woman guy and i prefer to have a girlfriend than to hook up cause hooking up leads to disaster. I miss my ex terribly and im still trying to get her back after dating her for one month, but im slowly realizing there are probably better girls out there for me to date, but I miss her companionship and im afraid I wont find another 'her'....i write songs to keep me motivated and busy, but it only brings back pain of not having anyone,i know it takes time, but i don't know what to do

Answer 1

DON'T PANIC- YOU PROBABLY STILL HAVEN'T MET THE RIGHT GIRL, AS STUPID AS IT SOUNDS! THE GOOD PART IS THAT YOU REALIZED THAT YOU HAD ENOUGH OF IRRESPONSIBLE PROMISCUOUS LIFE AND YOU WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE A NICE STABLE RELATIONSHIP. REMEMBER THE BASES OF A SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP IS HONESTY, COMMUNICATION, RESPECT AND MUTUAL COMPROMISES ALONG WITH THE LOVE. YOU NEVER KNOE WHERE LOVE WILL COME FROM. I MET THE LOVE OOF MY LIFE IN A MOMENT I DEFINITELY WASN'T LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP, WHEN I HAD TOO MANY DISAPPOINTMENTS AND PROBLEMS. BUT IT HAPPENED- I MET HIM AT A STRIP CLUB, HE IS FROM 6000 MILES AWAY FROM ME, 29 YEARS OLDER THAN ME!! WE BOTH NEVER BEEN HAPPIER! JUST THINK- WHAT ARE THE ODDS OF THAT HAPPENING? FATE KNOWS ITS WORK. SO PROBABLY WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT- SHE WILL SHOW UP AND TURN YOUR WORLD UPSIDE DOWN.

Answer 2

it is difficult because it truly is appears like she had to flow in and also you weren't waiting for it because of your little ones, it is maximum significant of direction. yet when she met the criteria on your needs and desires, then you actually must have made a range quicker because now it sounds too previous due. i do not imagine she bought a house only for thrilling. it truly is type of a clue like make a flow and it will be with me or no way.once that sale finalized, what desire is there. appears like a useless end.as far as desires, all of us has those, so no you're not any further "needy" anymore than universal. I even do not have any thoughts on the thanks to interrupt off yet i am going to assert this. i do not imagine it will be an difficulty with the way issues are going. She is acquainted with what she's doing and it is going to end....

Answer 3

Hey cheer up, you have won half the battle and that is realizing your faults, mistakes, and hang ups when it comes to relationships and women. Let me ask you, do you believe in "Do Overs"? What I mean by that questions is that we all live are lives in ways that we wish could be different, could be better. I got great news for you, God gives us all Do Overs in life and if your serious about settling down with someone then now is the time to fix yourself for the better. God is giving you a "Do Over" and you need to make some changes in your life. Everytime you feel the urge to go back to your old ways think of that girl out ther that is right for you and how she is getting further away.

Make some changes in your life. Your friends, girls, your ex, and anyone who knows you will see the difference in you. Its not until we make those changes until we see results. Good Luck and remember God doesn't make junk! You sound like a nice guy and I'm sure there is a special someone out there for you.

Answer 4

Well sounds like you were not a one woman guy when you were with this girl that you liked. If you think you are ready to make that change then all you can do is give it time. You did find the right girl once, so you will find another but you have to be willing not to go back to your old ways. Being in a band can bring many challenges in that respect. If you can make her your focus and forget about the rest, you will find true happiness and love. Again give it time. Good luck!

Answer 5

Firstly, now that she's cooled off, are you sure she still is not interested in you? Ask once more. Then give up and start looking.

You do sound a bit self obsessed (I..., I..., I...), to be honest. When you find the right woman you will talk more about her and less about yourself. It will take some time to find the right woman, so be prepared to spend years waiting if need be.

Jennie

Answer 6

You know, you are right.....it does take time. But anyways remember to be true to yourself. In the end, everything will work out. And it is great that you turned your life around....don't let it get you down. The person who waits for love the longest, they will appreciate it all the more when it finally comes along. Cuz honey, believe mee I'm still waiting too! lol

Answer 7

Well just be patient!! I know it sucks to want a relationship and can't find anyone to love or date. I don't think you miss your ex I think you miss the companionship. So just be patient and keep doing the things that makes you happy. Hopefully someone will come your way

Answer 8

well first of all u should take things slow, you dont fall head over heals after a month. its a process, second you never ever lie to a girl even if its something u dont want her to know, like if she asked u how many pple u been with tell her the truth she will see you are honest, they always know when you lie and that causes arguments. the right girl will come along, as long as u treat her nice and respect her, it might last.

Answer 9

You have already realized that perhaps you're "fishing in the wrong pond". If you're looking for commited relationships, start with people who are stable and looking for the same thing.

Answer 10

I think that you just need to try letting go. Does that make sense? Alot of guys hold back because of the "machismo" in them, and that usually leads to trouble in the relationship, because they aren't giving it their all. Try actually opening up your heart to love someone and realize that while you may end up getting hurt, you may also find someone you really love.