child support question...?

Question

ok so my 1 year old goes with his father every Tuesday, Thursday and every other weekend this is not court ordered just something we set up togehter. i recently started getting child support from Brandon (my son's dad) i have only gotten 58 dollars in all since he started so that proves that it is still pretty new. my question is, everytime my son is about to go to his dads, Brandon tells me that i need to feed him first because "that's what child support pays for" i have to give him milk when i take him to see him and diapers and just about everything. this last weekend Brandon had him and called me at 1 in the morning he was in another town where is parents live pretty far away from where i live, he called to say that i needed to bring him diapers. my question is, do i really have to do all this because he is giving me child support, right now i am paying for everything with my own money cause like i said i havent got much from him. what should i do. is he right?

Answer 1

No he is not right. Child support is for him to pay for the CHILD in case he needs things when dad is not around. If you want to feed him before he leaves with his dad you can, however, if he is not hungry, dad needs to feed him when he is hungry. That has nothing to do with the child support. He should have diapers, clothes, etc for him already at the house, you should not have to bring anything with him unless its medication,special toys,etc. Good Luck!

Answer 2

You need to talk with a representative from your local Social Service office about starting legal proceedings. Let the courts determine what the child support amount should be, the $58 you have received is definitely not enough to raise a child. If Brandon has a magical formula for raising a child on $1.12 a week, I am sure every would like to know how it is done. I have a child and it costs more than that to get lunch at school. If you and Brandon can agree on other matters like visitation before court, the better off you are. However, when your child goes with Brandon, you do not need to send all of the supplies from your house. If your son is hungry or wet by all means take care of that before he leaves. For your peace of mine, be sure to send enough clothes, toys and extra diapers to get him to his fathers house. You do not need to go out at 1am and take Brandon supplies that he should have anyway. Does he know what $58 will get you in diapers? Maybe enough to last a couple of weeks. The sooner you start child support proceedings, the better off you will be. Also, they will be able to answer any questions you have about what your responsibilities are. Just remember - 'Anyone can be a father but it takes someone special to be a Dad!'

Answer 3

I don't know what state you are in but I know our handbook from the Friend of the Court in Michigan states the custodial parent must send items the child needs with the non-custodial parent when the child is with them. Milk, no you don't have to provide, clothing, diapers you do. Being a responsible parent, custodial or not means providing for their child but he doesn't have to provide the diapers or clothing. He does have to provide food and shelter as well as any medical needs that may arise when the child is in his care. You can go online to your state and county website for the friend of the court to find out what the actual terms are and to read the handbook or just go there to get one. If you recently split up then the child support will be coming in slowly, if it's been awhile then he will pay back support if you requested it when you first approached the courts. It's good you let him see your boy even if it's not court ordered but you need to tell him that if he cannot provide food and basic needs such as diapers then he shouldn't take the boy overnight. Cruel but true. He needs to grow up. He doesn't have him that much and the diapers will last a long time especially if you send some with him in his bag. Good luck, it's a long hard road but your son's happiness comes first. Be happy he at least wants time with his son. But DEFINATELY get the handbook from your friend of the court so you know your rights as a custodial parent.

Answer 4

First you need to go to the Child Support Agency and file for child support. You will get more than that - and it will be enforced. You've tried to play nice (from what it sounds) and he isn't. And NO you don't have to provide when you son goes with his father. If you do - its for your son and not Brandon (to make sure your son is getting what he needs). And if what you sends happens to run out - he can be father enough to provide for his son also. The Child Support Agency will get a set amount due weekly for him to pay and take it directly out of his check. If he owes back pay, they keep track of them and could potentially take it out of his tax check. Another thing, since there is no court documentation that he is suppose or is giving you money now - everything he has given you so far - is considered a gift. Good Luck. Really do things the documented way - let the child support division handle this for you.

Answer 5

take him to court.... my girl friend is going through the same thing as u...( but her son is 14 months ) and they went to court and she gets 300 from him so u are getting ripped off.... and the father only gets him every other weekend ... so ur being really nice letting him have him all the time. but he should be supplying all the stuff that he needs when he has him... why should u do it?
It sounds to me that he isn;t really a good father.... what the hell does 58 dollars pay for? not much. U need to get yourself a back bone and tell him straight that its his son too and he needs to start being a real father!!!! How would he like if if he only had 58 dollars to live off a month.

Answer 6

No this is crazy if he wants to have the baby around than he needs to provide for the child at his house. DOn't send the kid naked, hungery, with anything but common sense say this is wrong. Do you have sleepover and expect the other child to come completely equiped for the event, NO you feed them and give them drink and probably let them use your toothpaste and toilet paper and thats just a friend. I would get through the holiday and contact a lawyer in the new year. This needs to be mandated by the courts or he can do whatever he wants with the child. Including leave the state or country you live in if it's not mandated other wise.

Answer 7

You need to go to court. You need to get more money for child support first of all. My bf pays $900 a month for 2 children and yet she doesnt send any of the clothes on his weekends and if they want something she makes the kids call and ask him for it. It isnt right. If he needs diapers than he needs to have everything the child needs before your child gets there. The dad has no right to call you or expect anything from you. In fact you need to get a lot more money from him. Alot more.

Answer 8

NO!! you do not have to give him all that stuff when he takes your son. yes send a couple diapers along with him, but if he runs out of diapers he needs to go buy them. Milk he should have that at his house. you shouldnt have to send along anything, but the child, clothes and a couple diapers. hes the father he should have diapers, wipes and extra clothing and all that at his house. so what he pays you child support so does that mean he doesnt have to buy his son anything for christmas?? come on . you need to go through court to get child support thats the best way. he should give you alot more than $58. its hard raising a child on your own. but seriously sit down and have a talk with him.

Answer 9

I would go back to court. Although child support is supposed to be to support the welfare of the child, it is do so while the child is in your care / day care etc. If daddy is going to take him on overnights, then daddy needs to be prepared to handle whatever situation may arrise. If this is the case, being you have only recieved 58 dollars...I would tell him that that money has already been used on formula / milk / diapers / wipes...etc! 58 dollars can be used very quickly.

Answer 10

Maybe he is never going to be mature enough to plan to buy food or diapers. You HAVE to know what kind of a maturity level he has. If its beyond his grasp, then of course you must send milk and diapers with the baby. Sounds to me like splitting with him was the right choice.

The baby has a right to know his daddy, whether or not daddy is a screw-up.

However, if he is so immature that he is neglectful (letting the baby go hungry or leaqving him in dirty diapers) then the courts need to get involved and set up specific and enforceable visitation rules.

Also, he's only going to pay what you require him to pay. If $58.00 shuts you up, then he's getting a bargain. You should be getting 20-25% of his NET pay. Also he is supposed to pay for health insurance for the lil tyke.