Been dating my current bf for 2 years. I got w/ him right after a bad breakup. He helped me get thru huge drama that was going on in my life for so long. He's really a sweet guy and a wonderful person, someone that any girl would wanna find. I conciously know this but for months now i have been getting huge urges to go out and meet other people. i've been really attracted to other guys and I feel so guilty but can't help feeling trapped. We've been together for 2 years but i still don't love him, as much as he loves me and as hard as i try. I've been honest about this to him the whole time, but he is very attached to me and it breaks my heart to hurt him. I keep on thinking that maybe love will come& this is just a phase & it will pass but it's getting harder for me 2 pretend to be happy when i'm really not. I know that under different circumstances i'd have even married him, he's that great,but i'm just not feeling it. I feel like i'm ruining something so special & wonderful go by :(
2006-12-19 02:39:19 · 7 answers · asked by PinkButterfly 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If your not happy do the thing that you need to.
2006-12-19 02:41:36 · answer #1 · answered by rastus7742 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is just a rebound that lasted for a very long time. The fact that this relationship started right after you got out of a relationship was a sign of "not ready as yet". Even though he helped you through a very rough time and everything, you see him as no more than a friend to you, a really good friend. It's just that you didn't get to enjoy the single life after you healed from your previous relationship, you didn't get to go out on dates, it was like you escaped from one relationship to get trapped in another. You didn;t get a chance to breathe on your own. And now, he's been comforting and supporting to you but that's all he is, you're ready to go back out and enjoy the dating life.
Sweetheart you need to sit and talk with him and as much as you do not want to hurt him, it is mandatory that you do because it's just as if you're leading him on. And if you don't talk to him soon, you might end up hurting him even more because you might probably cheat on him.
So you need to sit and talk with him, let him know exactly how you feel and that you too are just not at the level he thinks the relationship is. Common sense, the longer you wait the more difficult this will get and he is going to get hurt alot more. Circumstances might arise, where he'll ask you to marry him, what are you going to do then? Say yes when you obviously dont want too or say No and ruin his life.. No matter how sweet and wonderful he is, as long you're not happy, it makes absolutely no sense. This is your life and you need to do what makes you happy, yes you are going to hurt his feelings telling him this but its better sooner than later. Remember everyday that goes by, it's only getting worse and more complicated. You will find some other guy who is just as sweet and wonderful probably even better and who you will love and appreciate.
Let him know sooner before you do something crazy and it will ruin him for the rest of his life... it's your life, you have to live it!
2006-12-19 02:57:58 · answer #2 · answered by annalezam 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you don't feel it after 2 yrs you need to cut him loose so he can find someone that will love him. It's not fair to either of you to continue to allow this to go on. I know he'll be hurt and you don't want that - but in the long run it is the best thing to do.
2006-12-19 02:43:25 · answer #3 · answered by lunasage 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
see a nice guy helps a chick and they have a perfect relationship and women still want to get " hurt" then next time youll be on here saying o this guy hurt me bla bla shut the f up and get a ring on your finger have a couple of kids get a house and work your way to riches. or do you just wanna be a bum. im sure a better woman than you will have what he has to offer.
2006-12-19 02:49:24 · answer #4 · answered by luckydo6 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The simple truth is that you have to break up with him. You don't love him and you cannot continue an intimate relationship with him. To do so is dishonest, and the break up will be more painful for both of you the longer you wait. You care about him, so be gentle but firm. Wait 'til after the holidays...
2006-12-19 02:44:32 · answer #5 · answered by smecky809042003 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's time to make the break or you'll both regret it. It hurts now, but you'll both get through it.
2006-12-19 02:43:19 · answer #6 · answered by Claire 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let him go if you don't want to be with him. Before you hurt him.
2006-12-19 02:43:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋