So I just started dating a guy.. he seems cool, good looking, funny, well dressed, has a job, all his teeth, you know, he's one you want to stick around for. But anyways, I don't think he gives me enough attention.. he only contacts me if I contact him first. He's done nice things for me in the last two weeks, but I don't think he's actually interested in me that much.. I have also done nice things for him (it was his birthday the first week we met and I gave him a really cool present). So I don't know what I'm doing wrong here. I thought it was okay to be nice to people.. have I been too nice to him already and now he's bored? I'm ready to start seeing other people since he seems to be too busy for me (as am I, but the difference is that I make time for him in my schedule).. should I just not contact him until he contacts me?
2006-12-19 02:35:46 · 30 answers · asked by supernaturaldj2000 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thanks for all your answers so far. Dating is always a learning experience. I'm very secure in myself, that's why I don't fear "being nice" to anyone, not just potential dates, but I find that kindness is often perceived as weakness. So if I'm a total ***** then maybe I'll have better results in dating, but that's not "being myself".. I'm being forced to be a *****. So to all the guys who say nice guys finish last, it's the same for girls. I am not going to waste my energy on anyone buy myself then from now on.. I know who my friends are, but it still is a bit upsetting to think that me being me isn't good enough and that I have to put on an act of aloofness just to "get the guy".
2006-12-19 02:57:54 · update #1
I do not know if giving him a present on the first week you met him was good.
There was something that Carrie said once on Sex and the City that really rings true with me; 'When men make big grand gestures, it's considered romantic, but when women do it, it's considered desperate.'
Just back off a little and see if he comes to you, you have clearly made it known you like him.
Let him do some work now.
If he doesn't then you know he was not interested.
You 'll never know if he's interested you keep persuing him, because he might just be responding back to be nice.
Stop calling and see what he does.
Hoepfully he'll realize he had a real cool chick and he'll call you.
2006-12-19 02:43:16 · answer #1 · answered by ♥♥ Nikki ♥♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know, normally i will just bypass a question like this but this morning i am not going to...
it's been two weeks!! why are you so worried about anything after such a short period of time? in my years of experience, i will tell you that if a man is interested in you, he will contact you and that often times, when a woman is too needy or clingy from the get go, they will dump your behind toot sweet..why can't you gals just relax and let things happen without always pushing, pushing, pushing?
i don't get you at all!
2006-12-19 02:43:30 · answer #2 · answered by Tek ~aka~Legs! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you continue that way you might end up been a thorn in his flesh. I have a friend who is like that to me, she wants me around her always cos am well dressed, make her laugh, etc, infact she is so proud of me. she calls and sends mails and offline msgs, but I don't recirocate cos I don't fell like she does for me, even though I have given her several signs she still doesn't get it. If I did I would have given the attention she wants even without her asking but I am not. I think you are in a similar situation, leave him alone, if he is interested in you he would come after you.
2006-12-19 02:45:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would turn the tables and let him contact me because as long as he knows your gonna call him then he doesn't have any reason to call. And when he does call tell him that you know he's busy but so are you and you still manage to make time for him and if he wants this relationship to work out then he needs to make time for you. Good Luck!
2006-12-19 02:41:17 · answer #4 · answered by 2sweet4u 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a girl myself I can tell you that you're smothering him. Let him go, if he comes back then he really wants to be with you also. Since you said you're ready to start dating other people, go ahead and do it. This was not a long term relationship coming to an end, it was two weeks.
2006-12-19 02:39:58 · answer #5 · answered by Candy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I honestly don't think he didn't like, I just think he wasn't the clingy type! But if you feel that both of ur schedules are to busy and you need to move on, then let him know! Just say I think our schedules just aren't working out very well together and you'd rather be alone for right now!
2006-12-19 02:38:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think any guy who gets involved with you should worry. You sound to F/n high maintainence. Is the guy suppose to relinquish his life and take up living only for you? Why do you need such constant assurance and attention from the guy? I hope your guys know this about you upfront. Yeah, go abuse someone else.
2006-12-19 02:41:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that you should talk to him and see whats really going through your head and how you feel about the situation. you only been dating for 2 weeks. if i was you i would sit down with him be cool an express my self to him and if he really wants to be with you he would try to work it out also. thats what i always do with my man and it always works. on the other hand if you dont want to be with him dont call him and move on
2006-12-19 02:43:20 · answer #8 · answered by shy girl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find some one else to date. If he doesn't contact you then he just may not be interested in you. If he was into you he would call you.
2006-12-19 02:44:15 · answer #9 · answered by get fuzzy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your instincts... if you have the feeling that he's "not really into you" then you're probably right. ( his loss) remember, anything you might notice in the beginning stages of a relationship will only manifest. I'd not waste my time on a guy who isn't crazy about me. best of luck-
2006-12-19 02:40:14 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋