family problems?

Question

what can i do my mam and step dad have been split up over a year and she has met someone else. i have never met my real dad all i know about him is that his last name is farely dous anybody know a way for me to find him. is it a good idea help me please

Answer 1

I think its a good idea that your trying to look for your real father. Because I don't know mine either. I'm 48 yrs. old and I'm still afraid to ask my mom for his name. I was told what it was when I was 17 by my grandmother. But I lost the letter she sent me. Now I'm still curious what he is like. I just can't find the nerve to ask my mom. I just don't want to upset her. But you do what is best for you. Don't listen to too many people about it.
You can go to ancestry.com and see if he is there. Most people are registered and its easy access to this web site. Thats how I'm doing a family tree with the father I grew up with. ( not my biological one) But he is the only dad I knew. And loved him as such.
Good Luck sweetheart.

Answer 2

I think it is up to you whether you go and find out who your real dad is/was no one can decide that for you. If you feel you need to then that is fine lots of people do and dont worry about upsetting your mum etc they will understand, but on the other hand if you dont feel the need to find out then thats also fine and lots of people carry on a normal life not knowing. So basically it is up to you there is no right or wrong decision here, just make sure you are prepared for the answers you may or may not get.
Good luck
and Happy Christmas xxx

Answer 3

if you want to find your real dad try talking to your mum and family find out as much info as you can then try a web site like genes reunited etc or put an ad in the local paper where he last lived, but you have to bear in mind you may cause a lot of problems for instance how will this effect your relationship with your mum and does your real dad have a wife and family of his own now, will he have told them about you, how would he react to hear from you, are you prepared for the rejection or fall out from this, if so then go for it at least you wont be wondering what if all the time

Answer 4

Finding your real dad, prompts me to ask, the reason behind it. If it is only to escape your present situation, you might want to analyze and communicate with your mom based on that. Finding a real dad, one that your mom chose not to reveal to you, may be based on a lot of reasons. Mothers, most often tend to keep that information secret / or unrevealed if there is a safety factor involved. Either HERS or YOURS. If after thinking your reasoning through, and knowing why, you want to pursue this, ask your mom for information. I would even ask her why she has never shared the information with you before. Trust her answer. Talk with your Grandparents to validate what she told you.

Then if you choose to pursue, the Internet has vast resources to search for a person, but you would need the name and a copy of your birth certificate is a great start. (Though a birth certificate can be without the fathers name if they were unmarried.)
And like someone already has said, "Be prepared for all possible outcomes when your do find him"

Answer 5

Ask your mother, if she will not tell you, try to remember and write down any information that she has let slip. Ask at libraries, look on the internet, check out electoral rolls, get hold of a copy of your birth certificate and ask at the registry office of your birth!

Also other people may be good for information, as they may remember the father, what he looks like etc. Ask other relatives, friends of your mother, anyone who was around at the time. I appreciate that your mum may not be supportive so you may have to investigate other avenues.

Answer 6

Can you talk to your mother? Or your grandmother?
This is the best way to start. Your mother must expect you at some stage to ask questions.
Even if she does freak out, it is your right to know. Good luck. But be prepared for the fact that he might be a bit of a baddie.

Answer 7

It depends how old you are?

I met my dad at 16 and he was a ver y selfish man but I was old enough to not build him up as a fairy tale father, and judge him myself........

It is hard to take in meeting them and out of curiousity, I think it does need to be done.....

I would try looking on friends reunited his surname is unusual and if you could find out roughly what area he went to school it will help you

Answer 8

Start with finding out as much information from you mother
like you dad's FULL name
where his family come from?
Has she got a picture?
You may need to go to the library achives
if not
ask RICKI LAKE,OPRAH.TRISHA GODDARD,JEREMY KYLE,SALLY JESSY RAPHEAL to help they are quite good

Answer 9

U should talk to ur mum about this first, the last thing u want to do is upset ur mum. If u talk to her she may be able to tell u more about him, let her know how u feel, ok hun?

Answer 10

maybe you could get advice and help on an tv show for missing people ? they always seem to find people !
good luck !!!