I have an issue with my boyfriend that he gets sex when he wants it, but when I start trying to have sex with him...he changes what we are doing. He will do anything to stop it.This has been a problem since the begining of our relationship,but I dont know how to handle it.I did of course speak to him about how that made me feel.I told him that I thought our relationship should be equal and that I have sexual needs that he is treating like they dont matter.He usually responds to me,"sex isnt the most important thing in our relationship,right?"Then what do i say?When we do have sex, the sex is great!I hate to say it, but every time he has ever tried,I have never been able to say no.I just love him,and long for that connection we do have during sex.I dont want to be one of those sad girls that will just take what she can get when she can get it,but sadly I really have been.I want to feel like a sexy woman that can turn her man on!This has broken my selfesteem a lot! What should I do?
2006-12-18 19:56:03 · 14 answers · asked by LadyAlysse 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Leave your self esteem intact, and give him reason to question his own.
2006-12-20 03:10:55 · answer #1 · answered by One Who Knows 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are the woman. You have almost all the power when it comes to sex. The only reason he has power over sex is because you let him. Hold out on him. When he wants to have sex. Say no. ONLY have sex when you want to. If he doesn't want to. Just masturbate. Be the biggest tease you can be. Don't ever give into him and you will have control. Give it a week.
2006-12-18 20:00:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Any reason you have asked this same question 5 times in the past 24 hours ?
2006-12-18 20:04:19 · answer #3 · answered by Matthew K 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you HAVE to be able to say no. dot the end. some men dont like it when the woman comes on to them because it makes them feel less masculine, sounds stupid but its true. you need to turn him down and when he bitches about it tell him that now he knows how you feel. also next time you try if he turns you down say something about how most guys would like to be pursued because it means that they are sexy ect.. and you dont get it. he may start thinking about it that way
good luck
2006-12-18 20:15:23 · answer #4 · answered by attila 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You may wan to set a trap on him, if he wans to sex, ask him to lie on the bed, take ur handcuffs out, n cuff his hands to the bed frams. It will something look something like this>>)( . After that, tell him that you dun wan to have sex, thats too horible. let him stay at the bed at a night n tell him to wake up his senses. Actually i am only 12 years old. i like to help ppl with troubles like yours.
2006-12-22 02:41:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next time he wants to have sex, refuse to, no matter how much you want to be with him. When he wants to know why, tell him you don't feel like it. Keep refusing him sex until he is angry about it. Then point out that what he is feeling is exactly how you feel when he does it to you. I don't usually promote revenge, but sometimes it's all people will understand. If he leaves because of it, you'll know he only wanted you to please himself.
2006-12-18 20:02:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
You have to take back control. If you can't turn him away then he will continue to treat you like that. If you always give it up when he wants he has no reason to change.
2006-12-19 07:06:37 · answer #7 · answered by Bathtub Admiral 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As hot as you appear, dump the douchebag and find someone who will do the deed even if their junk is stuck in a bear trap and their hair is on fire. Seriously, only ugly girls should have to put up with that.
2006-12-19 06:56:13 · answer #8 · answered by Doug Church 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
WELL IF HE WON'T MEET YOU HALF WAY ON THIS NEXT TIME HE WANTS SEX,NO MATTER HOW BAD YOU WANT TO GIVE IT TO HIM JUST TELL HIM ,MAYBE LATER. WAIT A FEW MINUETS . OF COURSE HE WILL BE AFTER YOU LIKE A RABBIT DOG . THAT'S WHEN YOU EXPLAIN THATS HOW YOU FEEL WHEN HE TURNS YOU AWAY. THEN SLOWLY AND PLAYFULLY TEASE HIM AND SUDUCE HIM,TIL NEITHER OF YOU CAN STAND IT ANYMORE. IT THIS DON'T WORK BUY TOYS AND WHEN HE TURNS YOU DOWN EXCUSE YOURSELF AND TELL HIM YOU ARE GOING TO THE BEDROOM TO GET BUSY IF HE WANTS TO JOIN HE IS WELCOME. WATCH HOW FAST HE IS ON YOUR HEALS TO GET AN EYE FULL.HE WON'T BE ABLE TO RESIST.
2006-12-18 20:13:45 · answer #9 · answered by looken4answers 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well. when he tries to have sex with you.. say no.
just like he says no to you..
and well. if he can't appreate ur love then you don't need him.
he is right though sex isn;t the most important and just let him know you want to make him happy..
2006-12-19 03:31:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋