So, I live with my boyfriend & we have a roommate. My boyfriend owns the house, but has trouble standing up for himself when it comes to problems with our roommate.
Here's a list of ongoing problems:
*He doesn't do his dishes for WEEKS at a time, creating maggets & other problems in our kitchen.
*He won't buy his own, or even offer to split the cost of toilet paper, dog food (we both have dogs), laundry detergent, dish soap, etc.
*My bf feels thinks that he is stealing light bulbs from around the house for his bedroom.
*He won't clean up after himself, yet if we leave a fast food cup or wrapper on the table for even an hour, he starts cleaning up OUR stuff.
*He's a mechanic and leaves tools, parts, & extra work (ie: transmission, tires, CAR on street in front of house) sitting around for months.
*He talks slander about my bf right in front of me while he's on the phone.
*He doesn't even pay bills on time!
How do we address the issue w/out having to kick him out???(need the $)
Thanks
2006-12-18 17:09:38 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I seems from your statements that this person has been with you a while and continues to exhibit these less than desirable characteristics. What I would suggest is first talk to him about the problem, perhaps in a full apartment meeting. At this time, you could make a printed list of what is expected of people living in the house and have everyone sign it. If the roommate (or you or your boyfriend for that matter though I really doubt that will be a problem) breaks the signed contract, do a "three strikes you're out" policy. This is what a lot of the landlords in our area do and it works out really well. I really wouldn't put up with this behavior just because you need the money. I'm sure you could find someone else.
2006-12-19 05:39:17 · answer #1 · answered by Science nerd 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
If the roommate has been with the two of you for a week, I'd say talk to him about what is expected, but if your boyfriend doesn't put any "bite" with his "bark", then the roomate has no incentive to change. He (boyfriend) could say that one of two things "will" happen if the roommate doesn't change his act: 1) the roommate will have to begin paying for maid service!, or 2) the roommate will have to find another house to trash.
If the roommate has been with the two of you for (let's say) more than 6 months, I would think that you've made your bed and he won't change...that is unless your boyfriend has never brought up the subject of what needs to be changed. Could it be that the roommate has no clue how much this offends you?
Either way, your boyfriend needs to start acting like a landlord if he is going to have renters!
I hope that helps. Sometimes, you have to upset others to make your life liveable. Just part of life!
:-)
2006-12-19 01:41:59 · answer #2 · answered by whadda-dingo-gal 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
a couple of things I tried when I lived with these 2 guys who were jerks like that.
they would never buy toilet paper, so I would keep my toilet paper in my room and whenver I had to go I would take it with me and bring it back. That way they couldn't use mine. That worked really well!
Another thing was that they never washed dishes, so what I did since they werent allowed to use my dishes and had their own, I got this small bucket thing and put it next to the sink. Whenever there was a dirty dish of theirs I would pick it up and put it in the bucket and used the sink to wash my own dishes. That worked too, because the dishes don't smell bad if you keep them dry in that bucket or whatever you can use.
good luck!
2006-12-20 06:34:13 · answer #3 · answered by Atousa 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i would call it a lost cause and make him leave AND take all of his decorations along too. A person like that will most likely need a deadline to have their so called stuff removed else u thro it out or better yet hand deliver it via truck to his new place (my personal favorite). The latter works best while he is out partying
2006-12-19 07:15:13 · answer #4 · answered by Carroll Disher 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋